My attempt to decorate for Christmas…

Regardless of Bing Crosby, Celine Dion, and 98 Degrees serenading me with their Christmas tunes and flashing colored mini-bulbs blinking all around me, doing yoga in a tank top and stretchy pants on a mat in my room with all windows and doors open at nine o’clock at night threw me into thinking that it couldn’t possibly be December. No cold? No rain? No snow? No shopping rush? No Christmas cards? No hustle and bustle? No sipping hot chocolate with mini-marshmallows next to an open fire? No Starbucks dates with girl friends to exchange small holiday gifts? No family plans? Or family squabbles? No. Then it could not have been Christmas.

At least for me it wasn’t Christmas in the cultural sense that is forever ingrained in every American who is born and raised in the United States of America. The neat thing about it is that I had the opportunity to experience the Christmas season through Guatemalans’ eyes. First of all, many Guatemalans, like Americans, travel around during the holiday season to reunite and spend time with family members who live apart. Family is most important. Also, Christmas in Guatemala is not traditionally  “commercialized;” however the inescapable influence of “the States” is creating more of a trend in that direction. The customs I will share, though, are what I experienced in a rural, slower-paced part of the country. The people of the village where I often work, Pajquiej, invited me to participate with their community this year.

Probably the longest-standing Christmas tradition in Guatemala is the “Posada,” and it is practiced in other Latin American countries, including Mexico, as well. It is most common in the Catholic communities, but I noted that it is not exclusive because many rural-living Guatemalans are NOT Catholic but still implement posadas as a community event every December. Posada literally translates to “inn; home; shelter.” The Christmas Posada is a reenactment of Mary and Joseph’s journey into Bethlehem in the days leading up to Jesus’ birth moving from inn to inn searching for a place to stay.

The “Posada” procession in Pajquiej arriving at the destination house for the evening and requesting entrance at the door.

In Guatemala, the Posadas occur each night, usually starting on the 15^th or 16^th of December with the final one happening on Christmas Eve. Everyone who is going to participate arrives at the first “host” house to say some prayers, sing some songs, and in some rare cases even dance before collecting a candle and lining up for the procession. A figure of Mary and Joseph and possibly Baby Jesus in a manger are carried in front and another person is in charge of ringing the cow bell [throughout the procession, alerting others that they are passing by], then everyone falls into line behind them holding only their burning candles as they trek from the host house to the “destination” house each night, which can take anywhere from 15 minutes up to an hour, depending on the distance between houses. Walking up grassy hills in the dark, slipping through barbed-wire fences, and trying not to step in cow-pies really added a lot to the excitement of the evenings! Plus, the young boys would try to sneak up to all the girls to blow out their candles while the teenaged boys took up the rear of the procession so they could set off firecrackers all along the way…

When the procession arrives at the destination house, where the new hosts are waiting, there is a series of back-and-forth chants that occur at the door, imitating Mary and Joseph’s pleas while standing outside all of the inns. I believe that during the interchange the people at the new home do tell the “travelers” that there is no room. But that would be no fun if all the visitors were just sent away. So after the exchange, the new hosts open their doors to let everyone inside. Once gathered, there are more prayers or songs led by the hosts, and then everyone shares a refacción, or “snack,” usually sweet bread or tamale or tostada, and ponche, a warm drink. Other activities can include smashing a piñata or passing out small gifts to the children in attendance. When the festivities die down, all go back to their own homes and prepare for the following night’s posada. I only participated in two posadas (on the 18^th and 20^th) since Pajquiej is an hour on foot from my own home and it is not easy for me to find transportation at night, but those two nights were well worth the effort and will live in my memory forever.

My buddy, Jonathan, sipping his “ponche” and enjoying his “tamale” by the manger scene at the “Posada” host house after the procession and prayers.

I left my site early on the 21^st to meet up with Chelsea to go to the Maya ruins in Quiché for the 13 Bak’tun celebration (which I already wrote about), then I headed to Kathy’s site, which is located a short distance outside of the big city, Xela, and spent the night with her, preparing for an exciting event the following day. Kathy has an impressive ability to not only start up but also maintain strong friendships with all sorts of really cool Guatemalans. One such friend of hers, José Carlos, owns a restaurant in one of the larger cities in Guatemala where he invites local artists to perform live on Saturday nights. Back in August, Kathy, José Carlos, and our other PC friend, Ana, got the idea that I should sing one Saturday night there and so I debuted in an unexpectedly solo show with part-time piano accompaniment in September. (That’s a whole other story for another time, though…) After that, José said that he would like to have me perform again so we scheduled a Christmas show for December 22^nd.

During my performance at the restaurant, singing to pre-recorded tracks as my background music (1st set).

I had been preparing a set list under the impression that I would be singing along with the same pianist who accompanied me the first time, but three days before the show, he revealed that he had another commitment on the same night so wouldn’t be able to play this time around. Good thing for back-up plans! José Carlos immediately found another musician—this time a 19-year-old guitarist—to learn as much of my music [from a 24-song set list] as possible and play with me that Saturday. The only time we practiced together was the afternoon on the day of the show, but we immediately clicked and found the groove we needed to pull off a successful show. I was amazed at how quickly we connected—two people from different countries, ingrained with different cultures, and speaking different native languages—over our love for music.

During the 2nd set, I was accompanied by Jose on guitar…

I felt so lucky to have the chance to sing and perform in Guatemala! The preparation, the adrenaline, and my support system, which consisted of Kathy (my Peace Corps best friend, partner-in-crime, and designated “agent” for these shows), a couple other PC friends, and a handful of Guatemalan friends, all contributed to my temporary escape into another dimension—the type of time-and-space travel that one can only feel when he or she is entirely “in the zone.” After including a variety of classic Jazz, popular hits, and some Spanish songs in the first two sets, I concluded with only Christmas numbers in the final set. As I sang Barbara Streisand’s version of “I’ll Be Home for Christmas,” I couldn’t help but picture my family around the Christmas tree without me this year, but they knew I was there in spirit, and I appreciate them for supporting me and allowing me to be right where I need to be at this time in my life (without making me feel like I am missing out on too much at home). Being so far away instills a deep sense of appreciation for the love and warmth one finds at home.

So although I had no snow or mistletoe, I had Kathy, who is now like a sister to me, singing along from the front of the audience (and making certain that I didn’t forget the lyrics during a couple tough songs!), and I am pretty sure that we were both home for a moment or two, if only in our dreams… Throughout the years I have been performing (usually singing), I have learned that the presence of a special friend or loved one can make all the difference in regards to the quality that is delivered. Kathy has been that person for me here, and I wouldn’t have been able to pull off either show without her brains, finesse, and enthusiasm. I have learned a lot about teamwork from her and am so grateful for our friendship!

Kathy and I, post-show.

After making a quick trip back to site to drop off valuables and pack for “vacation,” I headed to Antigua on Christmas Eve in the morning (on the last reliable transportation out of my site until the 26^th). In Antigua, where some Peace Corps friends were going to meet up with me the following afternoon, I found myself quite alone and so I sought out a coffee shop where I could do some writing and people watching. Another Guatemalan tradition that occurs on midnight every year between Christmas Eve and Christmas Day is setting off a variety of firecrackers and fireworks in the streets so I stayed up to watch the sky light up that night. In many homes, families spend the entire day on the 24^th making (and eating) tamales and sometimes other special Christmas foods, like sweet black bean-stuffed pastry sort of things, as well.

Christmas Day was not much different. I hadn’t bought a single Christmas present for anyone and my family was nowhere to be seen so it was just like any other day in Guatemala, only with a man dressed up as Santa wandering around Antigua’s Central Park. On the bright side, it was the first Christmas I can remember where I wasn’t driving or being transported from my mom’s house to my dad’s house, or vice versa. I felt like I should have made a couple Christmas phone calls, but I wasn’t feeling great physically, and, psychologically, I am pretty sure I was thinking that if I didn’t make the calls, I could continue pretending that it wasn’t a holiday and thus avoid feeling sad. (Of course, my wonderful family and friends wouldn’t let me get away with that and I did receive some lovely phone calls from home!)

It wasn’t until I went to evening Mass at the Cathedral that I really felt the Christmas spirit seep into my veins. I felt at home and surrounded by wonderful people who I made friends with in the short time we spent together at Mass and immediately after. Listening to the homily and singing Christmas hymns was just what I needed! The Cathedral was decorated so beautifully, and it was just such a peaceful place to be. By the time I walked out of the Cathedral, I felt like a new person, happy and refreshed. I then met up with a small group of PC friends to get dessert crepes before turning in for the night. I am glad I know what it feels like to spend Christmas without my family but, God willing, I hope I never have to do that again.

The beautiful nativity set-up behind the altar at the Cathedral in Antigua.

The feeling of “skipping Christmas” continued throughout New Years since I ran off to Belize for six days immediately after Navidad! Early on the 26^th, Kathy, her boyfriend Frank (also a PCV), and I hopped on a bus headed for the Caribbean coast of Guatemala where we took a boat over to Belize and stayed in Punta Gorda, a border town, for a night before bussing up to Belize City the next day in order to catch a water taxi to Caye Caulker, one of Belize’s many islands. Because we were tight on time, we decided to stick to more of the popular, touristy places and did not get off the beaten path very much; however, I still believe that I got a really good feel of the country. (Unfortunately, all the pictures I had of Belize were accidentally deleted from the memory card in my camera on our fourth day of vacation so I won’t be able to share the country as I saw it, but some things are meant to be olvidable (forgettable), I suppose, or at least only live in our memories. Special thanks to Kathy, Pedro, and Frank for sharing their photos with me; about two-thirds of the Belize pictures in this post are from their cameras.) The entire time I was there I couldn’t help but think of what it would have been like if I had done my Peace Corps service in Belize. It is such a neat country!

Caye Caulker in Belize.

For starters, let me rave about the people. The majority of Belizeans I met were extremely friendly and self-assured. It made me realize how timid most Guatemalans are; that makes sense since they live in a culture of fear. In Belize, I felt very safe. I also didn’t feel like people were constantly trying to take advantage of me in some way or another. Dealing with “straight-shooters” was a nice break from the society in which everyone is trying to survive and get ahead of whomever is next to them. Belize didn’t even seem like a developing nation. Even the some of the public transportation busses we rode in were air-conditioned with a mixture of Christmas songs put to a reggae beat, classis Motown hits, and a couple Boyz II Men favorites playing over the speakers. Everyone respected each others’ space (only 2 to a seat), the bus ayudantes (helpers) didn’t try to overcharge anyone, and there were even people singing along, OUT LOUD, to the songs on the radio—something that is a rare occurrence in Guatemala.

Belize has such a laid back feel to it that I don’t know how anything ever gets done there. But who cares? People really just enjoy life. The Caribbean influence dominates the country, but the population consists of many different races: black, Asian, Latino, and white. Most of the country’s citizens are trilingual, fluently speaking English, Spanish, AND Creole. Belize used to be under British rule, and although it was finally granted independence in 1981, Belize is still on very good terms with the United Kingdom, and Queen Elizabeth the Second is featured on all Belizean currency. One really cool thing about Belize is that the country doesn’t allow big-chain businesses to infiltrate its economy so no Starbucks, no McDonalds, no Wal-Mart and no corporate monopolies—just small, personal, local businesses.

Some typical Belizean foods include rice ‘n beans, meat stews, Johnnycakes, and seafood, as well as the variety of tropical fruits that are available at varying times throughout the year. (Johnnycakes are small, whole-grain biscuits that they use to make small sandwiches and often sell on the busses.) I wasn’t afraid of buying or eating “street food” in Belize, and it was refreshing to not have to worry about disinfecting every piece of fruit and vegetable I got my hands on because Belize has clean water. And as far as seafood goes, we were spoiled with practically the freshest seafood possible—fish, lobster, shrimp, conch, you name it!—straight from the sea.

Just as we boarded the water taxi headed for Caye Caulker, our friend Pedro—who started PC service with Kathy and me in April 2011, was part my Spanish group and training town (Alotenango), became Kathy’s site mate in Huehuetenango, then left Peace Corps in November 2011 to continue working as a Registered Nurse—flew in to Belize City and met up with us for our Belizean escapades. Even though Pedro had been away from us and Guatemala for over a year, it was as if we all picked up right where we had left off; friendships created during one’s PC service are apparently pretty durable. Anyway, the four of us together made a great little travel group and a functional team, and I am so pleased that I got to explore a place I’ve had my eye on for over 10 years with such great company!

While on Caye Caulker, we rented a 4-person bicycle and rode all around the island!

We spent two nights on Caye Caulker, one of Belize’s best-known islands among tourists, where we found quite a lot to do regardless of being on a tiny, isolated island. On our first morning there, the boys went out and impulsively rented a 4-person bicycle that we took all the way down to the edge of the island and back exploring the different paths and homes staggered along the way. It was quite an adventure trying to get all four of us pedaling in sync while attempting not to crash! Shortly after our bike ride, we hopped on an all day snorkeling tour and spent the entire afternoon out on a boat that made three different stops where we could jump in and swim around. One of the snorkel spots was called “Shark Alley” so we were treated to a swim with a bunch of nurse sharks and stingrays, as well as various other types of fish and a handful of sea turtles. Our tour included all gear, a delicious seafood curry for lunch, and ceviche and special punch served to us on the way back to the island.

Kathy and Pedro snorkeling in the Caribbean.

A snapshot of the underwater world off the shores of Belize.

A stingray coasting along the sandy ocean bottom.

Despite the fact that our day had been full of high-exertion physical activity, we still decided to go out dancing that night since it was our last night in this spot. When we were all ready to dance, the nightlife on the island hadn’t quite ignited, but after one attempt at a small club toward the end of the island, we decided to get the party started ourselves a little closer to where we were staying. Kathy’s, Pedro’s, and my combined love for both dancing and Latino music made another great night! Before sleeping, though, we just had to get our feet in the warm, still, Caribbean ocean while the shining moon was reflecting down upon us. Couldn’t resist it! (And I can almost guarantee that you wouldn’t have resisted either had you been there…)

The Caye Caulker shore at night…

The next morning, we set off for the next destination in our vacation plans: Placencia, another well-known town on a peninsula at the southern end of Belize. For our stay in Placencia, Kathy had arranged for us to rent a condo type of set-up for the three nights we planned to be there that included a kitchen and dining room area so we could cook most of our meals ourselves and have a place that felt like a little home. It was pretty cool because we split the cost among the four of us, and Kathy and I discussed how we actually felt like REAL “grown-ups” organizing and paying for our vacation at a place that wasn’t just a hotel or hostel. Included with the condo rental were nice beach cruisers for each of us that we took out for our entire second day in Placencia, riding 10 miles up the peninsula, making short stops along the way to explore beaches and snap some photos, spending most of the afternoon at a restaurant right on the water relaxing, chatting, swimming, and munching, then turning around and making the 10-mile trip back, racing the setting sun. Frank cooked us up a fantastic dinner that evening, and we topped off our night at a karaoke place we found up the street, Kathy, Pedro, and I each taking turns with the microphone, riling up the Placencia regulars and encouraging passers-by to join in on our fun until they pulled the plug on the karaoke machine at midnight.

Sunset on the peninsula in Placencia, Belize.

Kathy on one of the beach cruisers we took out for a whole day in search of the best relaxation spots and beaches in Placencia, Belize.

Kathy, Pedro, and I posing against a wall at an abandoned building along the beach.

Me, Pedro, and Kathy after the first 10 miles on our beach cruisers, finally having arrived at our destination restaurant.

A tropical plumeria flower found in Placencia.

Kathy standing on the dock a few feet from the restaurant in Placencia, where we spent an entire afternoon.

Pedro and Kathy jumping off the dock. When we are together, there is never a lack of entertainment and fun!

The following day, we used some connections to get hooked up with a private snorkel/fishing trip. With our guide, we set out in search of something to eat for lunch that day and ended up with two bags full of fresh lobsters! None of us had ever been lobster hunting before so it made for another first time and unique experience for all of us. After a couple hours of that, our guide took us to a seemingly private island, Frigate Caye, where he prepared a BBQ-style lunch for us that included our catch-of-the-day, cheesy roasted potatoes, and a coleslaw salad. It was an exclusive little party of five! We enjoyed each others’ company and lots of music and food and drink there, then we loaded back into the boat and headed “home,” but not before stopping into Placencia’s famous Tutti-Frutti ice cream shop for a scoop!

A glimpse of Frigate Caye, a tiny island where we enjoyed a private BBQ-style lunch after a morning of boating, snorkeling, and lobster-hunting.

Fresh lobster catches-of-the-day!

Straight from the sea, passed onto the grill, and landed directly on our plates, this was the freshest lobster I think I have ever eaten. So satisfying to catch your own food! (Although I didn’t catch anything; I just toted the lobster bag around…)

Kathy and I with fresh coconuts that the boys opened for us.

A storm rolling in on the Caribbean…

That was New Years Eve so we planned on celebrating together in style. It was fun to actually be in a place where I could actually get dressed up a little bit because dressing up just isn’t practical in Guatemala so I have slipped into a “drudge clothing” lifestyle and don’t often where make-up, high heels, or dresses in my little isolated rural town. (I also have avoided trying to look nice all the time so as to deflect and perhaps lower the amount of unwanted attention/harassment I, as well as many other female PCVs, receive on a regular basis in Guatemala. This trip to Belize, interestingly enough, made me realize that I have been repressing and locking up many aspects of my femininity simply to deter the attention.) In fact, it had been so long since I had really done myself up that I hardly recognized the girl staring back at me in the mirror! The best part was being with one of my best friends and “prettifying” ourselves together.

Kathy and I all “done up” and ready to go out for New Years Eve.

We had a blast that night, ringing in the New Year together. We bounced from place to place, staying a little while here and a little while there for the music, dancing, and some late night street food, being goofballs together, laughing, and even meeting some interesting people along the way. We brought in 2013 in Belize with celebratory sparklers I had with me from Guatemala and later got caught in a tropical rainstorm before calling it a night.

Pedro, Kathy, me, & Frank, wandering around and entertaining ourselves just after ringing in 2013 on our last night in Belize. What a fun night!

I have a feeling 2013 is going to be a great year. For me, it will be another transitional year, but there is so much promise for success and joy in store: completing my Peace Corps service, making the most of the time I have left with my amazing PC friends, traveling around a little bit more, reuniting with my friends and family at home, tackling a couple personal projects, and possibly even focusing in on the next steps toward my career. There is so much opportunity ahead—I just can’t wait to get my hands on it! So spending NYE in Belize was awesome because we were able to go out of 2012 with a bang and start 2013 with a fresh outlook and new energy. All four of us bussed back into Guatemala together on New Years Day, determined that we had just had a completely wonderful, activity-filled, yet relaxed vacation.

So much has happened since then, but I’ll save those stories for upcoming chapters…

Love,

Alexandra

Originally I thought I would write a little about this “big day” before it happened, but since I didn’t know too much about it except that all the indigenous Maya people currently living in Guatemala were simply looking forward to a celebration (NOT counting down the last days of their lives), I figured I might have a better report to share after living through it and experiencing this special day first hand amidst many indigenous, traditional Maya people.

One guy went a little over-the-top in his costume choice while guiding a Maya ceremony on 13 Bak’tun!

Upon receiving my PC assignment to Guatemala, I got excited because since Guatemala is home of the Maya Empire, I thought if anything crazy did happen on December 21^st—like a bunch of volcanic eruptions, a meteor shower, or a gigantic earthquake—at least I would have a front-row seat. Some of us PCVs out here did engage in the hype, wanting to take advantage of our location so we could witness the events of the day. Many tourists and Guatemalans flooded to Tikal, the famous Maya ruins site in northern Guatemala, but since we PCVs are prohibited to travel there via land (because the department Tikal is in is dangerous due to narco-trafficking), most of us settled for other Maya ruin sites and volcanoes closer to our sites.

The place I chose was the Q’uma’rkaj Maya ruins site in Quiché, just outside the capital of my department about 2 hours from my site, which I have been meaning to visit for a while now. I met up with my friend Chelsea and we rode out there together.  First we walked through the small museum containing some ancient artifacts, but we quickly moved on to the center of the ruins where all the action was taking place. In comparison to other ruin sites, Q’uma’rkaj is relatively small so it wasn’t extremely crowded with people, however there were significantly more visitors than on any other day.

The Central grounds of the Q’uma’rkaj Ruins with ritual fires and ceremonies going on.

The activities that were going on around us included mainly Maya ceremonies and people praying around the ritual fires. All Maya ceremonies I have seen revolve around a central fire in which different sorts of items are “offered” and burned including different-colored candles placed in the directions North, South, East, and West (then one prays facing each direction, asking for the thing associated with the direction), nuts, seeds, fruits, flowers, plants, sugar, spices, soda, tobacco, and hard liquor (and sometimes chickens, like on the volcano I hiked last year on my birthday!). The offerings all depend on what one is praying for or giving thanks for. For example, sometimes candles will be tossed on the ritual fire in remembrance of one’s ancestors and to ask for guidance from them.

Maya women praying around a ritual fire with a basket of small offerings, mainly flowers.

Chelsea and I wandered away from the crowd for an hour or so in order to explore other areas of the ruins, namely the caves. We stumbled upon other small groups also practicing their ceremonies in more exclusive areas that afforded some privacy. We also inched our way through several narrow, dark tunnels that had small altars with offerings of fruits, flowers, pine needles, and candles set up at the caves’ ending points.

One of the caves Chelsea and I crawled into and explored. Tight squeeze!

In addition to the ceremonial proceedings back in the central area, there were other aspects of entertainment that contributed to the day’s festivities including different groups or individuals playing traditional Guatemalan music on marimbas, drums, flutes, etc., various people decked out in costumes or masks dancing around, food vendors selling snacks and drinks, tourists, reporters, cameramen, and those people who came only to observe and celebrate.

An indigenous boy resting after playing on his drum with his father playing a flute by his side.

The day was officially titled “13 Bak’tun” in Guatemala and was intended to be a joyous celebration in the Maya world. In the Maya calendar, the “Long Count” is based on short cycles of 20 days that fall into larger cycles of 360 days, 7,200 days, and 144,000 days. A “bak’tun” is equivalent to 144,000 days so 13 Bak’tun represents the end of this particular era. The Maya calendar started 3, 114 years before Christ and only went up to December 21, 2012. The reason as to why the calendar did not continue officially in books and charts may be unknown (at least to me), but I speculate that it might have something to do with the Spanish conquering Guatemala in the 1500s, forcing their ways on the indigenous people of the land, and destroying all but 3 books/manuscripts detailing the life, history, beliefs, and knowledge of the Maya people.

Nonetheless, the Maya people of Guatemala have proven to be resilient and have managed to maintain a large part of their identity and traditions. This change of the Maya Era of 2012 was an opportunity to celebrate the history of the Maya culture. For the people, it was a time to give thanks for what had passed and to turn their attention to a new era and the changes that will come with it. (Supposedly, we just left the age of materialism…) December 21, 2012 was a day to shed what has passed, and to refresh and renew one’s focus, energy, and spirit in preparation for what is to come. I am grateful that I had the opportunity to be a part of it.

I know it has been a while since I have posted, but now I am back in writing mode so stay tuned for upcoming chapters that will be posted very soon! (UP NEXT: Skipping Christmas; SOON TO FOLLOW: Fiesta Follow-Up & Future Plans.)

Love,

Alexandra

*This is a link to a PC video that was filmed in Santa Cruz del Quiché in May. There were about 10 of us working on this film project, discussing different aspects of life in Guatemala and how we have had to adapt. All of the PCVs in the video are Healthy Homes volunteers from my training group, and we all live in the department of Quiché. One of our security guys, Ariel, did the filming and editing. There are 3 videos in total, but this is the only one that is on Youtube.*

This month is very exciting for both of the groups I have been working with because next week, we are having “closing ceremonies” and parties to celebrate! I feel like it’s the end of the school year and summer is about to start. (Actually, in Guatemala, it IS the end of the school year—it runs January through October/November.)

Cat-in-a-box! As busy as I have been, my cat, who I have renamed “Missy,” isn’t affected and still finds ways to entertain herself.

The last couple activities I have done with my “casual” women’s group, Mujeres de Vida Saludable, have been fantastic! Recently, we wrapped up with charlas and activities on acute respiratory infections, sugar in the diet, and dental hygiene. We also had a day we went out and played soccer—promoting a healthy lifestyle. For our last cooking class, we made pizza, which was a hit! I have become very close with this group of ladies, the majority of whom are related to Rosa somehow. They are all so warm, friendly, and FUNNY as heck, always laughing and joking. Our big party is going to be on Monday and will include a Jeopardy-style review game in teams, a participation diploma handout, games, and food, of course. (Although we are done with classes for now, we will likely start meeting again in February.)

Our soccer team assembled right before the game started. We ended up winning 5-3, I think.

Juana, Rubidia, and another Rosa during a dental hygiene activity. They had to eat peanut butter M&Ms, getting all the chocolate on their teeth, then show everyone up close before the teeth cleaning demonstration.

To wrap up our dental hygiene charla, we brushed our teeth together using the new toothbrushes my dad and step mom sent me in the mail for this activity. I think some of them were shouting, “Thank you, William!” when I took this photo. We really had a fun day…

We made pizza for our last cooking class and topped it with chicken, bell pepper, tomato, onion, pineapple, and cheese. It was delicious! And now we can all make pizza in our own homes (well, at least those who have some sort of oven).

In Pajquiej, we are also wrapping up training for the Health Promoter course. We are planning Health Promoter graduation for next Friday, and it’s going to be BIG. We have invited the entire community of Pajquiej plus the mayor of San Andrés, representatives from the Health Center in San Andrés (including the doctor and all the people who have accompanied me to the trainings) and Ministry of Health of Guatemala, and a couple of members of the Peace Corps. We are expecting between 150 and 200 people. It’s going to be quite the event!

My favorite kiddos in Pajquiej: Yessenia, Kimberly, Oliver, and Yaser. Such a joy to be around these energetic little ones!

We received some funding from the mayor’s office to make a big lunch for everyone, which will be prepared by my 15 health promoters, Rosa, her sister, and me. In addition to food preparation, my health promoters are working in three teams to create their own charlas and activities, representing each theme we covered during the course, which they will present during the event. Also, next Tuesday, this group is going to collectively take a field trip to the Health Center to get PAP smears. Of my 15 ladies, only 1 has ever had a PAP smear; after covering the topic during training, we discussed the possibility of taking group action in preventative health by facing the PAP smear, which the majority of them will do next Tuesday. After that, I have invited them to come to my house for a snack (and a surprise “congratulations on becoming a Health Promoter cake”, party planning, and work on their presentations. This will be quite an exciting week for all of us!

It is tradition to dress up nicely for certain holidays and special events in Guatemala so the ladies in both of my groups are getting their nice outfits ready for next week’s events. In Mujeres de Vida Saludable, all the women are indigenous so they all wear traje típico, the traditional clothing, and speak K’ich’e. Only about half of the women in my Health Promoter group are indigenous, but since traje típico serves as formal wear, all the ladina ladies jumped on board, suggesting that we ALL wear the traditional clothing for our event so that we are all unified. I’ve been thinking about buying my own traje típico for a while now, so this is the perfect time. Instead of just picking out my corte (material “skirt”) and hüipil (blouse-like top) from a shop, I actually got to personally design them! With the help of Rosa, Manuela (her sister), and Oralia (her aunt), I picked materials, colors, designs, and ribbons to complete my outfit. I am going to browse the market for a faja, the woven and embroidered belt that holds up the corte, this Sunday with Rosa and Manuela. Yesterday afternoon, I picked up my corte from the lady who hand wove it in just a couple days, and tomorrow I will have my finished hüipil from Rosa’s cousin—just in time for our celebrations this week! I’m stoked for my new Guatemalan clothing!

Here is a picture of my personalized corte, which I will wear as a skirt. I chose the blues and teals, yarn, and spacing of the stripes. Corte made with vertical stripes is characteristic of San Andrés, as well as the black stripes with white blotches, and the colored design stripes. You’ll have to wait to see the whole outfit put together!

Another opportunity that came up for me recently is starting work with Magisterio students in town. (Magisterio is the school for teachers-in-training; it is sort of like high school since it is the step before university—if the students choose to attend—and the average age of the students is 17-20.) I met a couple girls at a birthday party in town. Later I asked them if they had received HIV/AIDS workshops; they responded, “No, but what we really need to know is how to plan NOT to get pregnant.” This launched me in the direction of creating a sexual education workshop that starts from the basics of anatomy and physiology of the reproductive systems, includes a small genetics lesson, covers the importance of taking responsibility for family planning, stresses the value of abstinence, introduces different methods of pregnancy prevention (there are THREE natural methods taught in the health center in addition to the hormonal and surgical methods available), and concludes with an HIV/AIDS mini-session. The workshop takes 3-4 hours and includes four hands-on, participatory activities for the students to better grasp the concepts covered.

Magisterio students participating in one of the activities during the Sex Ed workshop.

So far, I have given five workshops, and the only complaint from the students is that we didn’t have enough time. I am totally in my element, and I LOVE working with this age group! The director of the school has told me time and again, “This is your house; you are always welcome here.” Well, in that case, I’ll definitely continue! Since school is getting out, I only have time to do one more workshop, but the director says this is something that should continue yearly to every new class so I am thinking about possibly training this workshop to health center workers so THEY can sustain the education after I leave. Did I mention that the first class I taught this workshop to had 4 pregnant young ladies in attendance?  Oh, we have lots of ideas for related themes to tackle (like breaking the cultural idea that having so many kids is a sign of manliness) during the next school year…

In a nutshell, my last couple months have been filled with lots of work stuff and spending time in my communities. Guatemalan Independence Day was in September so I participated in those festivities in my site, and I have attended a handful of birthday parties lately, as well. When I have been leaving my site, instead of traveling to touristy areas and vacation-like spots, I have been visiting other PC friends at THEIR sites. I spent a weekend with Kathy at the end of September and half a weekend with Chelsea just recently. I loved getting to see how they live and function in their own places. But I’ll talk more about the “Peace Corps World,” including changes, updates, and statistics, in my next post. Also, since on the topic, I should note that my site mate, Perry, decided to leave PC for good and has been medically separated. He left San Andrés Monday morning so I had him over for a final “site mate dinner” the evening before. My work and life in site shouldn’t be affected since we really didn’t spend too much time together.

Independence Day is known for the parades that file through the streets in every town. A parade cannot be complete without a marching band!

Sarahy was voted “princess” in her preschool class so she got to ride in front of the rest of her class in her very own castle built on her dad’s (Ozman’s) pick-up truck. The rest of her class marched behind in “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs”-themed (and hand-made, probably by their parents or siblings) costumes.

Chelsea and I during a hike in the forest near her house. Her site is just under 2 hours away from mine. (She’s right outside the capital of our department, Santa Cruz del Quiché.)

*Chelsea wrote about “50 Ways to know you are in Peace Corps Guatemala” on her blog. The majority of the things she said ring true for most of us. So if you are interested in hearing the perspective of another Guatemala PCV, I included the link to her post. It’s pretty funny!*

http://clpcguate.blogspot.com/2012/06/peace-corps-guatemala-is-you-know-youre.html

Lastly, in regards to Guatemala news, as some of you already have heard, Volcano Fuego erupted BIG TIME last month, but no one was harmed. This is the active volcano that I used to stare up at every morning in Alotenango during training; my host family said all the lava went down the opposite side, away from their house. We also had a 5.5 earthquake a couple days ago, but no damages reported. Rainy season has come to a close, although it was hardly felt at all this year; we can say goodbye to the MUD…and hello to the DUST now. And on a final positive note, the number of security incidents reported in the PC Guatemala world has decreased significantly this year. Todo bien!

Kathy took this shot of me during a hike to the waterfall in her boyfriend’s (Frank’s) site in Totonicapán. It was a beautiful day!

The other day a Guatemalan acquaintance of mine asked me what it is that I miss most from home/the United States. I didn’t hesitate to respond to him that, besides family and friends, I miss the general cleanliness of the United States as well as having options. (I will save the concept of “options” for another discussion.) Trash cans, smog checks, organized recycling, paved roads, my own car, sidewalks, vacuum cleaners, washing machines, and dryers are just a few factors that contribute to cleanliness—not to mention the habits Americans have all developed to meet cleanliness standards due to enforced regulation such as getting fined for littering, not being able to register a car if it hasn’t passed the smog check, and being sent home from work or school if you show up looking like a rag-a-muffin.

In Guatemala, it isn’t so easy to stay clean and look presentable all the time (which is probably why it isn’t expected as a general standard), especially for those who are living the small-town rural lifestyle—which happens to be the majority of the population. As strange as this sounds, when I think about my wardrobe at my mom’s house in the States, I breathe a sigh of relief that it is tucked safely away in a dresser and a closet and not being exposed to the raw elements and harsh treatment of Guatemala. The following are some examples of what happens to our clothing upon exposure to this untamed lifestyle:

HOLEY

Initially, I was horrified when I discovered the first holes in some of my clothing just over a year ago; now it shocks me to find a piece of clothing in my stack that doesn’t have some sort of hole somewhere on it. (And if it doesn’t have a hole, then it is surely affected in another of the following forms.) When I take a minute to observe the attire of everyone else around me, I am relieved to know that I do not suffer the holey predicament alone: for everyone, it seems to be an inevitable byproduct of living in Guatemala.

First of all, the majority of people in Guatemala hand-wash their laundry in pilas on cement washboards, and those who live way out in the boonies and do not have a pila will use rocks in a riverbed to get the job done. In addition, anyone who tromps about the countryside will likely encounter barbed wire fences marking boundaries for communities, cow pastures, properties, etc. I have personally battled many a barbed wire having to pass over, under, and through while hiking out to and around aldeas, or villages, and can’t say that I have conquered every single fence-crossing completely unscathed. One’s clothing also suffers from catching rides and bouncing along in the beds of pick-up trucks with whatever random accompanying cargo, be it planks of wood, chicken wire, baskets of corn, beans, or fruit, or some sort of farm animal.

A barbed-wire fence I often have to get across when I hike out to Pajquiej.

Speaking of animals, the cat I have claimed is another culprit for putting holes in my clothing. She likes to use her claws to pull herself up my pants to climb on my lap when she is being too lazy to jump, and she also refuses to knead without digging her claws into everything soft that I own, including my blanket, sweaters, and yoga pants. I suppose this one is actually MY fault because I give her permission to sit on my lap and my bed (away from my pillows!).

Some holes are just from constant wear. For example, my favorite pair of jean capri pants finally wore down in the typical upper inner thigh spot where every girl’s favorite over-worn pair of jeans is bound to rip. (It is not just ripped, but shredded.) I saw this coming and put in a shopping request with my friend Elease back home who sent me a new pair of khaki capris just in time. Unfortunately, that “new” pair already has two small holes, and I’ve only had those capri pants for a little over a month now! I just keep discovering new holes. One of my shirts has a hole in the sleeve that I got while running through the market trying to catch a bus on time; it got snagged on a vendor’s stand, and I have had a safety pin in that shirt ever since—for about a year now. Too bad all my holey clothes can’t be classified as the holy kind because, man, I would surely consider myself EXTRA blessed!

My cat, Serena, snoozing on my bed in the middle of the day.

FADED

Most of the faded effect on PCV clothing is the result of over-washing or direct exposure to sunlight and other powerful elements. Many of us spend hours walking outdoors under the sun to get to our communities for work or just through town to run errands or grab some fresh produce at the market. In addition to sunlight, just by being outside, we are vulnerable to all sorts of dust, dirt, and nasty smoggy exhaust from all passing vehicles; not only are we inhaling all this unpleasant stuff in the air, but our clothes are soaking it all up as well. It can be such a hassle to do laundry that many of us now wear our clothing until it is unbearable and desperately needs a wash. Plus, all the sweat, dirt, and dust that we are constantly exposed to act as a deterrent for washing—we all know our clean clothes are going to get soiled again probably within an hour of putting them on so why bother worrying about keeping them immaculate?

Since clothes dryers aren’t existent in my town (or in most of the country), right after the clothes get washed on the cement washboard, they go directly out in the sun to dry on clotheslines, many of which happen to be on people’s roofs or out in their yards. Just as over-exposure to the sun damages people’s skin and can lead to skin cancer, it also destroys the vibrant life in our clothing. Recently, my friend, Mari, commented that she remembered when my long-sleeve red shirt used to be red… Sad but true—it has lost a bit of its spunk after being tortured by the sun. Another thing I have learned and gotten used to is that “sun-dried” goes hand in hand with “stretched out.” One time I thought I had lost weight since my jeans weren’t really staying up very well, but I was fooled—it was really that they were just stretched out after a good sun-dry.

My laundry, sun-drying on the roof of my house.

On a positive note, I have learned to embrace the “faded effect” for the sake of integration. I am proud to say that I can wash and dry my own laundry using the same methods, soaps, and clotheslines that Guatemalans living in my town use. When it comes to laundry, I have absolutely no shame in publicly displaying my clothing and the majority of my undergarments on the clotheslines on the roof. By now, I wouldn’t doubt that half the town is well aware of my collection of rainbow-colored cotton granny-panties—and if not half the town, then at least the guys building the house directly across the street.

One last thing that comes along with laundry hangin’ on the line are all the surprise bugs and insects one can find tucked away in the folds of the damp garments. There is one funny looking type of pincer bug that especially loves to climb inside my socks and hide in my sheets while they are drying on the roof. Just like one would check the pockets of a pair of pants for gum, crayons, or money before tossing the pants in the washing machine, here, you’ve got to check your clothes, socks, panties, and sheets for critters before you fold them or, more importantly, wear them—unless you want to be pinched, bitten, or poked unexpectedly.

Different bugs come and go here with the ever-slightly changing climate. They usually arrive in “shifts” that change every two to three weeks or so. Luckily, in this part of Guatemala, the bugs aren’t unbelievably gargantuan or frightening. The biggest bugs are probably the moths, the cicadas, and the cucarachas (cockroaches), which are all harmless. Oh, and there are those hardy, slow-as-molasses rhinoceros beetle guys. A couple months ago, we had an invasion of this really weird type of flying ant-worm thing that arrived in swarms and had no consideration whatsoever for personal space—thank goodness they’re gone now. With rainy season come the mosquitoes, miniature ants, creepy jumping spiders, and pincer bugs, but since rainy season this year has been extremely mild, the bugs are not out of control…

MOLDY

Musty and dank would also be good adjectives to fall under this category. This is usually only a problem during rainy season (May through October), but it sure makes one appreciate both insulation and ventilation—two things that are far from common in Guatemalan households. When I faced the first mold growing on my stuff last year and, frustrated, vented to one of the PCV Leaders, she was so matter-of-fact while giving me tips to combat the situation that I realized mold is a reality for ALL PCVs out here during their service. I have been significantly more prepared for the second time around this rainy season and mold is no big deal anymore, although still annoying.

One can even make mold on clothing a science experiment in regards to how much bacteria and germs linger on exposed clothing. One time after a run, I tossed my sweaty sports bra in my laundry basket and by the time I got around to doing laundry maybe a week later, it was polka-dotted with fuzzy green growths! Gross, right? Yeah, I thought so, too. I have even found mold growing on the threads of my belt and my high-heeled shoes. Now, I have to put preventive measures in place and make regular mold checks. All of us PCVs have definitely learned the importance of the upkeep of housecleaning—if we let anything slide, our stuff will be destroyed. Period.

This is my complete PC wardrobe, folded and stored nicely on my bookshelf up against the brick wall. (I keep my small articles of clothing in the basket to the right.)

Luckily, as mentioned before, rainy season is light this year (it is La Niña). The good part about that is that our unpaved roads don’t get utterly destroyed, we are not tromping around in mud every single day, and maintaining cleanliness is a little bit easier. Usually, when there is a lot of rain, everything we own soaks up the moisture in the air, from our blankets and clothing to our books, work materials (posters, pamphlets, etc.), and even bookshelves. It can be more than a little frustrating. Things like crawling into bed and trying to sleep between layers of damp sheets and putting on my t-shirts that have been infiltrated by the smell of musty brick and cement instead of Bounce dryer sheets will not be missed when I get back to the USA.

Unfortunately, the shortage of rain this year has visibly affected crops, raising the price of corn (Guatemala’s staple food) as well as other grains, meat, and produce, thus putting a damper on the financial well-being of the majority of the inhabitants of this country whose lifestyles are based on the agriculture industry. In addition, there is speculation of water shortage in the upcoming months. For me, I suspect that will mean going several days without having the water turned on, but for many others in the country, it will be much worse.

SPECKLED

Well, this is a fun characteristic of the wardrobe that takes many forms. The biggest source of obvious discoloration on my clothes is bleach—and not on purpose. You see, one day while I was treating my bookshelf for mold, I knocked the bottle of bleach over and some of it splashed up onto my clothing as it hit the floor. I had no idea that when black clothing gets bleached, it turns orange! Well, you learn something new every day, right? In my old life, accidental bleach marks probably would have rendered my clothing “destroyed” or “unacceptable for public appearance,” but standards are slightly more relaxed here so one must learn to improvise: I never thought I would use a black permanent marker to fill in rust-colored speckles on my black sweaters and T-shirts before wearing them out of the house (not that it would matter here one way or another).

Some other sources of speckling include brightly- or deeply-colored clothing or towels bleeding their dyes onto vulnerable material while soaking in the laundry bucket as well as slipping on rocks or in fields (which tends to leave grass stains or dirt streaks) and even hanging out with 4-year-olds. Last time I was in close quarters with Sarahy and playing with her, I discovered small chunks of the yellow, orange, and green pure-sugar candy she was eating smooshed into random areas on both my jeans and t-shirt—two days later. At least we PCVs can accurately declare that our personal clothing lines are one-of-a-kind!

Here I am standing by the pila in my house; the left side “sink” has a built-in cement washboard specifically for laundry!

During our Mid-Service Conference a few weeks ago, we had a session on perspectives during which we discussed the things we cannot change and how instead of getting frustrated with everything, we have learned to accept certain things. I’d say the clothing line is one of those things. There are days when I really do miss my clothes from home and even dream up new ideas for my future wardrobe, but I think it is more the idea of having options of what to wear that I fantasize about rather than having SO MUCH clothing since being a PCV has definitely proved to all of us how little we actually NEED to survive.

To finish up regarding the topic of dress, I will tap into the psychological perspective that many of us PCVs share (the females, at least). First, let me rattle off a statistic from the PC Medical Office: approximately 80% of female PCVs gain at least 20 pounds during their service in Guatemala. From what I mentioned in my previous post about the social activities of women in Guatemalan communities revolving around food to the typical Guatemalan diet that includes an overabundance of carbs and refined sugars, it is easy to understand the weight gain predicament, I suppose, but it is definitely not something that is easy to adjust to.

I hadn’t really been paying attention to it until some Guatemalans—true to their “call it as they SEE it” habits—told me that I was engordandome, or “getting fat,” a couple months ago. One guy even told me that I had better not gain any more weight. That was really nice of him. (Not!) I’ve talked to at least 10 other PCV girls who have been dealing with similar situations. I’m lucky that I actually cook for myself and have some control over what I eat unlike some other PCVs, and, sure, I was not being very health conscious for a while there, but I am only 5 or 6 pounds over my “normal” weight so I don’t see much of a problem. When put into situations like this, it is very hard not to get frustrated and go off on people explaining that if there were actually more options for exercise here or if they wouldn’t push so much bread, tortillas, rice, and fried chicken on us (often at the same meal!) or if we didn’t have to deal with stupid digestive system issues, then maybe we would be more successful at managing our weight. But it wouldn’t make much of a difference so the response is often, “Yes, I suppose I have gotten a little curvier lately.” If it’s any consolation for us, Guatemalans also comment when we LOSE weight…

In Guatemala, size doesn’t seem to matter all that much. No one really cares about fashion or clothing size. (The tags on my clothing right now range from size 4 to 9 and XS to XL—and I couldn’t possibly be all those sizes at once!) As mentioned before, the important thing in this society is functionality so I do not often go out of my way to try to look nice. While discussing this topic with Kathy and talking about how we miss getting “dressed up” and feeling ladylike, she claimed, “Guatemala has the least sexy culture in the world!” We decided that this factor has a huge effect on our own attitudes toward attire. On one hand, there is no pressure to dress to a tee; on the other hand, there is no motivation to be stylish.

I didn’t even realize how much cultural standards and social media impact the ideals and identity of a society until I was watching some American movies on DVDs that I brought down here with me and noticed how skinny and fashionable practically every leading actress was. More than once, I caught myself thinking, “What a cute outfit/hairstyle! I want to dress like that/look like that/fix my hair up like that/etc.” People are highly influenced by what they see and the things that surround them on a regular basis, and I believe this may be the principal cause as to why we PCVs are complacent with our clothing line while we live in Guatemala. I can appreciate that the focus in Guatemalan culture is more so on people, family, and spending time together as opposed to having an unrealistic “perfect body” or being aesthetically pleasing. There are different priorities, for sure, however, in the sense that body size is linked to proper health and nutrition habits, there may be a need for a shift in attention in this society.

We focus on Nutrition (with cooking classes!) in one of the women’s groups I work with. Here, Rosa is describing the suggested diet for children under 2 years old as well as the benefits of breastfeeding.

With all said factors in mind, I am attempting to redirect my correlation with body size and image to nutrition and physical activity and implement healthy lifestyle habits as well as encourage the healthy habits of those around me (part of my job!). There is really no escaping the PCV clothing line, but I find solace knowing that ninety percent of my current PC wardrobe will NOT go back to the States with me when I leave Guatemala; in fact, I might even leave up to 95% behind! My clothing serves its purpose here well (even though it makes me feel frumpy some days), but I look forward to the day I can start fresh again. This post, although sort of a rant, is not a complaint of my current chosen lifestyle conditions; it is meant merely to put a humorous spin on our situation and also to express my appreciation of the cleaner conditions, easier methods of clothes washing and drying, common insulation and ventilation, convenience of wardrobe storage, and progressive fashion statements that are prevalent in the United States.

A NOTE ON THE OLYMPICS

Even though I do not have a television here, I was really looking forward to catching the Olympics on some of my friends’ TVs. It turned out to be much more of a challenge than I expected. Even when I was near the Peace Corps office for Mid-Service Conference and being put up in a hotel with TVs in every room, viewing the Olympics was practically impossible. It went something like this: flip through about 100 channels, passing four or five channels dedicated purely to soccer, to find ONE channel with the Olympic games. And it wasn’t even full coverage. It was about an hour of a quick “visit” to each event that was going on, and then on the same channel when the next hour started, the opening episode of Survivor: China started in Spanish—that was from like over 10 seasons ago!

I didn’t realize how much I would be affected by “missing out” on the Olympics, and I was actually a little bit depressed about it. I think my experience was indicative of a huge cultural difference. At home, in the USA, watching the Olympics together has always been a family tradition for me. But not just that—it is such a part of the American culture. I suppose when a nation has a track record of dominating the Olympic medal platforms, taking home nearly 100 medals in ONE season of Olympic games, and boasting talented, record-breaking athletes in almost every sport then that nation’s people would be engrossed with watching history in the making. In contrast, Guatemala loves soccer. Also, I believe Guatemalans do not have an obsession with tight, athletic bodies outlined by chiseled abs that ways Americans do. That is just not something that many Guatemalans aspire to achieve while existing in a rural lifestyle; it just isn’t realistic here.

On a positive note, London’s Olympic games did have an impact on Guatemala’s history. After sixty years of participation in the Olympics, Guatemala claimed its very FIRST Olympic medal EVER this year. It was a silver medal won by Erick Barrondo in the event “Speed Walking.” (Just like when I was introduced to “Curling” for the first time in the 2010 Winter Olympics, to discover “Speed Walking” was not just a sport but also an Olympic event was a little confounding, but in a neat way.) Woo-hoo! Go, Guate!!! Anyway, after that win, Guatemala upped its Olympic coverage understandably, but I still got most of my Olympic highlights from Yahoo! News when I had internet access.

Erick Barrondo, the silver medalist from Guatemala in this year’s 20K Speed Walking event in the London Olympics.

I realize I have been MIA for a while, but that is the nature of rolling into the second year of Peace Corps service. I felt like I was traveling non-stop from April through July for PC trainings, conferences, mid-service medical appointments, and visitors. When I finally got back to my site for an extended period of time starting early August, I felt like I needed to get back into work mode so I have been spending a significant amount of time in my community and with my Guatemalan friends (and choosing NOT to purchase very much internet credit). Also, a fellow PCV friend, Lauren, transferred a bunch of television shows to my computer from her hard drive, including 3 seasons of Glee, which, I admit, is more than somewhat addicting. I have many more topics to write about including finishing up “The Gringo Groove” series as well as delving into Nutrition and diet in Guatemala plus some comments on pregnancy to start, but I am not stressing too much over writing at this point because these next couple months are going to be crucial for work progress in my community.

Enjoying the company of my friends in Pajquiej! I stayed overnight at Carmen’s house with her daughter, Queylan, and Queylan’s baby, Marleysi, then taught them how to make French Toast in the morning–which we ate for breakfast accompanied by Guatemalan rice tamales, of course.

Hope this was a fun post for you!

Love,

Alexandra

EXTRA! EXTRA!

Congratulations to my sister, Ariana, and Christopher on the birth of their baby girl, Hayden Skylar Leedham, on August 11^th, weighing 5 lbs., 10 oz, AND to my best friend, Linda, and Robert on the birth of their second baby boy, Henry Dean Usher, on August 23^nd, weighing 8 lbs., 12 oz. Both babies are healthy, breastfeeding, and wrapped in loving arms!!!

Well, since I have just passed the halfway point of living in Guatemala and serving as a Peace Corps Volunteer alongside 44 other PCVs who started service at the same time as I did, I think the time is appropriate to explain just exactly how we PCVs have adapted to living and working here. It has been an exciting, challenging, and eye-opening experience thus far, and we each still struggle daily to figure out how we fit into the various worlds in which we play a part. At this point, we seem to exist at an in-between phase of each world—we really aren’t fully a part of any of them as we try to decide into which worlds we would like to integrate and from which ones we are okay drifting away for a little while.

There are four worlds in which a PCV exists and that I will spend the rest of this chapter exploring: 1) Life in our sites and how we are fitting into our communities with our work, social life, living in isolation, etc.; 2) The world of gringos living abroad including what Guatemalans are used to associating with gringos and how we PCVs relate to other gringos out here; 3) The PCV population and how we relate to each other and socialize together; 4) Our families and lives in the USA, back “home.” (Actually, I am only going to elaborate on the first two worlds this chapter and save the other two for the next chapter.)

It might be helpful to review the “three goals” that constitute the Peace Corps’ mission to promote world peace and friendship as these three goals underlie the majority of a PCVs chosen lifestyle, purpose, and daily interactions. They are the following:

1)     To help people of interested countries in meeting their need for professionally trained men and women.

2)     To promote a better understanding of Americans on the part of peoples served.

3)     To promote a better understanding of other peoples (and cultures) on the part of Americans.

With those in mind, I will venture into the PCV/Gringo Groove within our Four Worlds…

1) Life in site

First, I will start with an update on my living situation. I finally feel like I am settled into my own place. My kitchen and room are completely set up so I don’t really have a lot of hefty outgoing costs anymore. I have a very peaceful environment and living space, which makes it easy for me to focus and relax. I can work on my own schedule and cook, eat, bathe, workout, study, visit friends, prepare my work materials, and sleep whenever I want. One of the best aspects of serving in the Peace Corps is that most of us get to make our own schedules; this might make the transition back to working for someone else difficult! I do realize that this may be the only time in my life where I have so much freedom—of schedule, work, time, projects, responsibility, etc., so I am doing my best to appreciate this time.

Last November, Tayra, Ozman, and their daughter, Sarahy, moved out of the house into their own home—four whole blocks away. A different couple, Katy and Marco, started renting one of the rooms where I live in December. I am not very close with them, but they are easy to live with—pleasant, quiet, and respectful of space. Although Tayra and Ozman don’t live here anymore, I still regard them as the closest thing to a “host family” that I have in site. Tayra is more like my best girl friend and sister here than anything else, though. We still get together a couple times a week to cook and share meals and recipes or just hang out. I also have a nice little “auntie” relationship with their daughter, Sarahy, who is 4 now, and Tayra just found out that she is pregnant again so I get to be around for the next baby, too!

Perry, me, Tayra, and Ozman enjoying a spaghetti dinner that Tayra and I prepared at her house.

In regards to our counterparts, Rosa is really the only one of our original four who we actually interact with. (Two of the other ones don’t work In San Andrés anymore, and the other one is in charge of a Health Post now instead.) In the middle of February, three new educators/nurses came on board at the Health Center so we unofficially work with them as well although Rosa is our “primary” counterpart. I hardly ever spend any time in the Health Center anymore as there is not much for me to do there. My focus is on my aldea (small community/village), as well as a women’s group I meet with in San Andrés just a few blocks away from my house.

A big change is that my site mate, Perry, and I decided to split up in February and divide our communities so that he is working by himself in Limón and I am working by myself in Pajquiej. This was probably the best decision that we could have made as it means that we can each devote more time and energy to each community as well as work at our own paces and not have to run all scheduling and other work details by each other. We are two extremely different people with unique personalities, work styles, interests, tastes, talents, social needs, and coping mechanisms, and thus hardly spend much time together anymore; however, we are still available to each other as a resource and support. We just now both have the opportunity to have an individual experience and learn and grow from facing and overcoming challenges on our own, instead of being overshadowed by or dependent on the other. It has been good for both of us.

This is a little snapshot of what I do. I am giving a charla about different types of parasites that can cause stomach sickness to my womens’ group.

The only drawback I have experienced from separating from Perry is that now everyone is finally convinced that he and I are not married—even though we were telling them from the beginning that we were never a couple—and there has been an influx of men trying to get me to be their novia, or girlfriend. I do not give my phone number out, but I have dealt with calls and text messages from several different guys in town—some of whom I know, others who are complete strangers—who magically obtained my number and then refused to tell me who gave it to them because they “didn’t want me to be angry.” I declined offers, stopped answering my phone for unknown numbers for a while, and nicely informed those who I actually knew that if they continued to send me mensajes de amor, or love messages, that I would not want to talk to them at all anymore because it made me uncomfortable and that I was just not interested in being their novia. So the pursuits have dwindled (word must have gotten around about all the unsuccessful attempts), and I am managing quite nicely at keeping a low profile in town.

Of course, I am still teased about finding a suitor quite often by people who know me better. A couple of my lady friends in town and in Pajquiej like to joke about me learning how to make tortillas so I can feed my “husband” while he works and I stay home and take care of the kids all day, and then they imagine, “If you marry my brother/son/uncle/cousin…then you’ll be my sister/daughter/aunt/cousin…and so-and-so will be your mother-in-law/sister-in-law/niece/etc.!” The women, especially Tayra, like to let their imaginations run wild about the prospects of my love life and the possibility of me living in San Andrés or Guatemala forever. In contrast, the handful of men I know that have poked fun at the topic usually says things like, “If you were dating my nephew, you could take him back to the States with you!” Since the banter is harmless and mostly in good fun, I’ll jokingly join in on some of their crazy ideas, then we’ll all laugh about it. But I have never in my life experienced so many people scheming about how I could end up as a part of their family…

Tayra and Sarahy getting ready for the preschool parade around town.

Moving on to the topic of my work, I would like to bring back to mind the First Goal of the Peace Corps Mission (above) which is “to help people of interested countries in meeting their need for professionally trained men and women.” The translation is that Peace Corps’ primary focus is development work. I’m just going to come right out and say that development work is a pain in the butt. I have never been one to prance around dictating people’s lives, so it is extremely difficult to enter a community as a complete stranger and implement a plan on how to better the lives of the people in that community. What right do I have to come in and tell these people how to live? Who are we to say that how they are living isn’t “good enough”? And why should these people trust us?

It is so frustrating to all of us working here, especially in communities (like Pajquiej) that have not had experience with Peace Corps before, because our “bosses” and PC Headquarters want to see numbers. They need quantitative data as proof that our programs are actually making a difference within the countries we serve. They want to know how many people we have trained on which topics, how many workshops we have given, how many students we have educated on HIV/AIDS, how many households within a particular community have received the training on the benefits and maintenance of a chosen infrastructure project and then eventually received the project itself, etc. We have to justify our program in order to keep it running (a.k.a. funded) in this country. But we can’t force people to change—let alone attend our meetings and listen to us. These Guatemalans are now our co-workers, friends, and even families. In the communities, they are people, not lab rats, and we must always take that into consideration when approaching our work.

I understand that many people—supporters of us PCVs—back home are curious about what exactly it is that we do out here. People want to see progress and results—they want to believe that our time spent away from them is being used in some sort of productive way. That’s fair. We PCVs, as well, wish to have some sort of validation every now and then. We want to know that the frustrations and tears, bug bites (and chucho, or street dog, bites) and diarrhea, adherence to cultural norms that we do not personally believe in, tolerance for public transportation, and changes in diet that we all put up with will ultimately be “worth it” in order for us to see some small positive change in the world. We all came here to “serve” and to give back to society a part of what has been bestowed upon us as far as education and experience in life goes. There is a desire that lies deep within many of us to practice NOT being selfish. However, when we get to a point where we have been here for about a year and have very little to show for ourselves, we all start to question exactly what degree of selflessness we think we are demonstrating.

Right around the one-year mark in the typical PCV cycle of service, many volunteers experience what is referred to as the “Mid-Service Crisis.” Our minds are filled with doubt as we try to identify what we have done and can’t seem to come up with much of anything. Depressed, lonely, and lacking motivation, we wonder, “Why am I here?” yet we aren’t ready to quit because we are determined to do something during our service. The Mid-Service Crisis normally occurs right before [and ends with] a major breakthrough in one’s community. I believe I went through my “crisis” in February, and I have recently spoken to some other PCVs who are currently struggling with finding their niche here and are now taking a step back to re-evaluate their purpose and motivation for being here. Everyone experiences it at a different time—and we all imagine how life could be back in the States “if we left right now”—but that is all part of the process which most often proceeds with a renewed commitment.

Amidst all the pressure, guilt, and questioning, a huge enlightenment came over me that helped curb my feelings and refocus my energy. It was that this country is not driven by productivity, schedules, and the expectation to attend every single prior engagement to which one has committed; on the contrary, it is a very forgiving society. I never thought that I would place productivity and forgiveness on opposite ends of a scale—let alone the same scale! Very different from the American culture that revolves around hitting numbers, producing results, and maybe even gaining noticeable profit, this culture is based on “showing face,” spending time, and gaining trust before any moves will be made or changes will occur. It makes sense now how anyone who is familiar with the PC experience will claim that the entire first year is about integration, while the second year is focused on work and carrying out projects.

I invited Carmen, her daughter, Queylan, and Queylan’s baby, Marleysi, over to my house from lunch one Sunday. We had egg salad sandwiches and carrot/potato/onion cream soup!

With that in mind, I changed my approach to work in Pajquiej. In March, just after Perry and I split, I decided that I was going to focus on simply spending time in my community so I picked a day once a week to just stop by and hang out with people in Pajquiej. By that point, Perry and I had already given some charlas, or health talks, to interested community members and completed house visits in December and January as part of a community diagnostic. Our next move was to form a health promoter group in the community and train the members on specific health topics. Health promoter groups are a major focus of the PC Healthy Homes program (my program) in regards to sustainability within a community. The idea is that we train motivated, interested community members to serve as leaders and health resources in their community who will basically be capable of doing our job when we are no longer here.

At first, getting people interested in forming this group was like pulling teeth—in these areas, it is difficult to get anyone to COMMIT to anything. One big problem is that these people are accustomed to a culture in which there is a whole lot of talk with a very small percentage of follow through. When I first started telling some community members that I was going to visit them, and then I arrived at their houses on the day I told them I would, they were surprised and told me that they didn’t believe that I was actually going to show up. It turns out that almost nothing happens in these communities unless you are physically present to facilitate a start or see it through. I believe that all my little house visits and time spent participating in my community have paid off in that they have led to many community members gaining confianza, or trust, in me and what I say. Confianza is the magic word here, and it is the thing that every PCV seeks to attain within their communities, as it is a sign of integration.

Before integration occurs, the idea of moving mountains is daunting to a PCV; once confianza exists, however, it is not just the PCV out by himself picking up one small stone at a time and changing its location—it is the single PCV (who started by example and sparked interest, acting as a sort of catalyst) plus a bunch of members in a community all working together to move several stones at a time or teaming up to transport the big rocks. Much patience is required to commence the implementation of an idea, but once a community is engaged and has identified all the tools and resources they need (which are usually right in front of them and just need to be pointed out), a PCV can pull back and the community will still be able to complete the job on its own. And THAT is how mountains get moved.

In Pajquiej, things are starting to get fired up. In March, we had health promoter sign-ups, and in April, we started a 7-month program of trainings during which we meet twice a month. I have fifteen women, ranging from age 14 to 61, who show up regularly to the 2-hour training sessions that are usually held either at the school or at one of the lady’s homes.  We are focusing on three major topics—diarrhea & the cycle of contamination, nutrition & the immune system, and reproductive health & family planning, and we have completed five training sessions so far. About half of my health promoters cannot read or write (and one of them hardly speaks any Spanish, but understands it) so each session involves explanations through drawings on big posters as well as hands-on activities. By the time my health promoters graduate in October, they will be responsible for the important points of the information covered (I create handouts with drawings and diagrams for each session with the information they will need to know), and they will also have prepared and given a small charla in front of a group of people. I really enjoy working with these women, and because many of them bring some of their kids to our meetings, I have plenty of opportunity to interact with [and include] the kids during the sessions as well.

These are some of my favorite little ones from Pajquiej: Yessenia, Yaser, and Kimberly Johanna. They always help me out during the the health promoter trainings.

In addition to training a group of health promoters who will be the driving force for creating behavior change and healthy habits within their homes primarily, and then extending to the rest of the community, I have put out feelers for interest from the community regarding other small projects such as learning how to compost (with worms) and then creating tire gardens and growing veggies in their own homes. We are working toward these things in Pajquiej, but it is a slow process. It is definitely something that I would like to facilitate, though, because it would be so useful to them, and the community pretty much has all the basic materials necessary to do these projects—they only lack the “how-to.” I will be responsible for teaching that part, but first I think I have to figure it out for myself because I have never done this stuff before either…

One last aspect of future work in Pajquiej that is related to the PC Healthy Homes program is the possibility of carrying out small infrastructure projects (such as cement floors, improved stoves, or latrines) based on need within the community. If the people in Pajquiej decide to participate in this process, my health promoters would then help me to educate and monitor the habits of the participating families in order to make sure “behavior change” is occurring before a project will be installed. In April, we Healthy Homes PCVs all attended a 3-day IST (In-Service Training) during which we all witnessed and participated in the construction of each project. Since most of us are panning to move in this direction with our communities, IST was a great experience for us because we all finally felt like we were getting our hands dirty and doing something tangible for once.

This is the improved stove that we constructed for a Guatemalan family during IST.

In May, we then attended another 3-day training (called PDM, but I forget what that stands for), with either our counterpart of a member from our community, during which we learned about the paperwork process involved with creating a budget and soliciting funding for the projects. A couple months ago, I asked the doctor (who is in charge of what communities we work in) about possibly working in another community as well, but he recommended that I stick to only one community because he said I am going to have to be in the community a whole lot more once we get projects going. I figured he knew best since he has already worked with Healthy Homes PCVs in the past, so I agreed with him. IST and PDM confirmed the doctor’s predictions as attending these very informative and rewarding training sessions made me realize how much work planning and implementing projects is going to be. Things are going to start getting busy here in the next couple of months, but I feel stable enough in Pajquiej to proceed forward, and I think they are going to be willing to work in that direction with me.

Since I only go to Pajquiej on average twice a week, I am left with quite a bit of free time in San Andrés to fill when I am not preparing my work materials. I really love being in site. Living in my house is like being on vacation so I don’t really try to get away too often. I am accustomed to alone time now and have come up with many ways to fill my days including reading, studying more Spanish through a Spanish Grammar workbook, rereading my Nutrition textbook from college, keeping a journal, and writing the occasional letter or e-mail or watching a movie. I can always do yoga, go for a run, or do a dance workout video. Plus, there are all the household chores to keep my attention such as sweeping, disinfecting and cutting fruits and veggies, scrubbing the floor, hand-washing all my clothes and putting them on the line to dry, and cooking. There is quite a lot to do so I rarely find myself bored. And when I desire more social activity, all I have to do is step outside my house and take a stroll down the street—it’s a guarantee that I will find someone to talk to.

Rosa sharing a tostada with her “nene” (baby boy), Isaac, after a charla.

It got around that I enjoying working out and some of the ladies in the Health Center and around town started asking me when we were going to workout or go running together. Based on the interest, I got excited and decided to plan “Workout Wednesdays” at my house every week during which we would do one hour of guided exercise/yoga/cardio classes together with some fun facts about women’s health at the end of every class. My idea was that this would also serve as social time for the ladies. So I planned the first workout class and no one showed up. The next time I saw all the ladies who had told me they were going to come, they all asked me excitedly how the class went. I told them no one showed up. They felt a little bad and every one of them had an excuse, but two weeks later started asking about it again. So I planned another class. This time three people came! I was pretty excited about that, and they had a great time, they told me, and couldn’t wait till the next week. A week later, one lady came back—and I gave her a personalized session. The week after that, no one showed up. I sat around my house for the entire hour waiting, laughing to myself, knowing that no one was going to come. And now I don’t plan workout classes anymore. I tell them, “If you want to workout or go running, you pick the day and time, get ready, and then come get me and I’ll go with you.” That seems to be a better system because the ones who are serious WILL come find me.

My attempt to make “Workout Wednesdays” a regular, social activity didn’t work out for several reasons. The first reason is that it was mainly MY idea—not something that the women came up with, planned, and were excited about. And the second is that the preferred past times of a single, childless, American woman in her twenties may not be feasible to women who are all married with children and have endless household and familial obligations or who are expected to be at home during certain times of the day. The truth is, taking time out of the day to do yoga and other exercises just isn’t practical here, and the women here do not see the same [long-term] benefits as I do with working out. They seem to get a workout in just by performing all the household tasks on a daily basis. I also think many women were interested in what I was doing at first because I am a gringa and the things I do are thus “different and interesting.” But the failed attempt at workout class was actually a great lesson for me and helped me to look beyond what I do to understand how women socialize in these communities.

My biggest observation is that life—and social time—in small rural communities revolves around food, cooking, and mealtime. (There are no mani/pedi salons, Starbucks, movie theaters, or indoor rock climbing gyms in these parts!) The Sunday market is like the big hang-out spot where everyone assumes they will run into everyone else and catch up on the town gossip, the status of a sick family member’s health, what produce they found cheap that day, etc. It took me awhile to catch on to this and realize that importance of mealtime as well, but once I did, I jumped on the bandwagon and started focusing my social life around food, too! Starting with Tayra, I started inviting people over to my house to share a meal or try out a new recipe. I also now keep enough snacks on hand to be able to invite anyone over on the spot. One evening, I had a total of nine people over (3 co-workers at the Health Center, their kids—5 in total, plus me) for a dinner that we all cooked together! I occasionally go to some of my friends’ houses as well to cook with them, learn their recipes, and share a meal. I willingly recognize FOOD as the biggest factor in my breakthrough to a steady social life.

Pancake dinner night at my house! Victoria (left) and Ana Maria (standing on right) brought their munchkins to help out, play, and enjoy the meal. (Rosa was there, too–just not in this pic.)

Interestingly enough, my reputation for cooking and having cool recipes has spread around to the point where people are requesting that I teach them how to cook. I can’t help but think of how comical this is considering I am that person who burned banana cream pie once, lived off of cereal and frozen foods throughout college, and really never created much of anything too special in the kitchen (besides Chicken Surprise—never the same dish twice!) before moving to Guatemala. It just goes to show how much we are capable of doing in spite of limitations we may have placed on ourselves before. What a transformation! And when I think on this, I wonder, “What else can I do that I used to think I couldn’t?” Along these lines, as I continue studying about health, food, and diet, I have started to create a little niche for myself here that focuses on nutrition, and this is something that I plan on incorporating into my everyday interactions for the duration of my service.

During our “Fats” charla in our nutrition class, one of the ladies is participating in an activity identifying various healthy fats versus bad fats.

Thanks to Rosa, my amazing counterpart, an opportunity opened up for me to start spreading nutrition education. Since she used to always accompany Perry and me to the aldeas when we would give charlas, her family heard about what we did. She told me one day that her mother and aunts asked her, “Why doesn’t Alejandra give us charlas? We aren’t any different from the people in the aldeas…” And that is how my women’s group in San Andrés began. This group has a different dynamic than my health promoter group since I am “sharing information” as opposed to “training” the women in Pajquiej. It is extremely laidback, and we usually have anywhere between eight and fifteen adults in attendance (plus kids). We named the group Mujeres de Vida Saludable (Women of a Healthy Life), but Rosa’s husband and one of her uncles have both started attending our classes regularly as well so it’s Mujeres plus 2 hombres (men).

During the “trash” charla, we did a timeline activity where each person had to identify the amount of years it takes to decompose various items of organic and inorganic waste. (This is the organic end of the scale.)

I love this group! We have so much fun. Everyone who comes lives in Rosa’s “neighborhood” and is related to her somehow so they already have good chemistry, and they are always willing to participate. It is a nutrition-based group (because they wanted cooking classes), so we also have a schedule based on two classes per month, ending with a big party in October. I rotate themes between a health topic with recipe sign-ups for the first meeting every month and a nutrition charla with the cooking class for the second meeting. In the nutrition classes, we have covered the importance of a balanced diet and are now focusing on the functions of each type of food (fats, proteins, carbohydrates, vitamins, and minerals) individually for separate charlas. Under the health topics, we have covered themes about diarrhea, parasites, and dehydration prevention, as well as reproductive health. That class was hilarious as I explained the anatomy of the reproductive systems (with diagrams), gave a very generalized genetics lesson, and Rosa introduced all the different methods of family planning. The ladies were cracking up and asking so many questions—it was great! We have also had lots of fun in the kitchen making everything from soup to [Incaparina (a special protein-enriched type of mix they use out here)] pancakes to salad (with a special homemade dressing) to Sloppy Joes and Dulce de Leche.

This is the day we made Sloppy Joes for our cooking class after I finished a protein-themed nutrition charla.

I am very happy here in site now that I have developed good relationships and steady working goals with schedules. My “best friends” in site are Tayra, of course, a lady named Carmen who lives in Pajquiej and is like my right-hand-woman there, and Rosa. I see and hang out with each of them once or twice a week and feel like I can just “drop-in” to their houses (or Tayra’s workplace) any time I feel like it. I have had them all over for meals, and they invite me over often as well. Rosa even asked me to help plan her baby’s 1^st birthday in April and be in charge of the games at the party as well as help make tamales de arroz with her aunts before the party. (THEY wanted to give ME a cooking lesson! Lol!) Although I have had to change some plans around and abandon ideas I had for my PC experience (such as getting a dog, starting a girls’ choir, etc.), the way it is turning out to be is better than I could have imagined. Even having a cat sort of as a pet has been better than I thought: she pre-washes most of my dishes after I eat AND she is in charge of cockroach control. I’m getting much more than I bargained for!

Can you find the kitty? She’s in there somewhere! This is “my” cat, Serena, resting in the garden at my house.

2) Being A Gringo Abroad

PCVs are definitely not the only gringos prancing around Guatemala. Since the Dollar (and the Euro, etc.) go a long way in developing nations, Central and South America have become ideal destinations for travelers, students of language, and people who just don’t feel like living in their own country at any given time. Here, one can find gringos of all sorts including expatriates, short-term volunteers, long-term volunteers, entrepreneurs opening up small businesses, employees of NGOs (Non-Governmental Organizations), students studying Spanish, retirees, vacationers, backpackers, and general tourists.

This is the beautiful cathedral that stands in Antigua’s central park.

The majority of gringos in Guatemala flock to certain areas, and I daresay they have “taken over” these parts, namely Antigua and Panajachel—the latter of which has even been nicknamed in guidebooks “Gringotenango.” Anyone who comes to visit this Spanish-speaking nation could hang out in these towns the entire time and get by just fine without speaking a lick of Spanish. Guatemalans are also accustomed to dealing with gringos in these parts and so many have learned English to facilitate interaction for business or simply for getting along.

This is Lago de Atitlan, surrounded by 3 different volcanoes. I took this picture from Panajachel (a.k.a. Gringotenango), which sits right on the edge of the lake.

In some parts of the country, gringos are very common and can be prime targets for both crime and vendors. I have yet to be a victim of petty theft or any other sort of crime, but I do get easily fed up with the non-stop hounding from vendors to buy their stuff so I just try to spend as little time as possible in big “selling areas.” The people in the more rural parts of Guatemala generally have less contact with gringos and thus have a different reaction. There tends to be more staring and pointing and even a little bit of shyness. Knowing that you’re being stared and observed by a bunch of pairs of curious eyes can either be awkward or fun. One curious little girl on a chicken bus took a fancy to me and turned around in her seat (in front of me) so she could watch me for about 20 minutes. I kept smiling at her and she finally asked me, “Why are your lips red?” followed by “Why are your eyes blue?” After I told her that it had something to do with my parents and the color of their eyes and lips, she decided she could start talking with me and telling me about her family and friends at school. She was 5 years old and super cute!

Sometimes, like in the example mentioned above, I will proudly exhibit my “gringo behavior” (a.k.a. my normal daily activities and habits) in order to allow for observation and more understanding on the part of Guatemalans (2^nd PC goal!), but there are also days when I just want to hide away or say, “Geez, can you make it any more obvious that you are staring at me and could you please stop investigating the contents of my purse/bag so thoroughly every time I open it?!” There are always up days and down days of living as a foreigner in another land—just like everything else that happens during PC service.

The general level of interaction between us PCVs and other tourists/gringos is very low. We are friendly, but this is our home now, and we have a certain lifestyle that is different from any other traveler. We must abide by certain rules and fulfill our obligations to our work and communities. For example, we are only allowed to have two weekends out of site every month which limits our availability to frolic around the country with a cool backpacking gringo we meet who is only spending a month or two in Guatemala. Also, we have experience crossing paths with many young travelers who look at their trip abroad as a big party. Most of us PCVs aren’t living a two-year party, that’s for sure, so again, views on being in Guatemala just don’t match up. I have met a handful of interesting gringos outside of the PC circle while I have been here, and I do admit that it can be very refreshing; however most of the time I go to gringo-congested areas, I like to keep a low profile as I don’t always feel like exchanging travel stories with everyone I meet since I am not “traveling” right now.

The “Cross on the Hill,” in Antigua, is a popular spot to go for a bird’s-eye view of the city–both for foreigners and locals. (Volcan de Agua is the volcano in the background.)

Travelers are really neat people and usually have pretty fantastic stories, but this is where my life is right now, and the people who are important to me are the ones I interact with on a regular basis and have meaningful relationships with. It is difficult to connect with short-term travelers when they are just grazing past the surface of the land into which I have been fully immersed. I can almost guarantee that most PCVs would agree with the statement that we didn’t join the Peace Corps and move to Guatemala for two years in order to hang out with Americans the entire time. We PCVs take pride in the fact that we have Guatemalan friends and that we include them in our plans—and they include us in theirs.

Creating strong relationships here has a catch, though. Unfortunately, this is temporary for pretty much all of us. We are just passing through (although not as briskly as the majority of gringo travelers), and in another year or so, we will leave Guatemala, disappearing from the lives of our dear friends here. Our Guatemalan friends know and understand that, too, but it’s not something we like to think about.

On that note, in reality, since PC is a volunteer organization, any of us can leave whenever we want to—we each have lives in the States that we can go back to anytime. Many of us experience feelings of guilt associated with those thoughts because the people here do not have a choice. This is their reality. Of course, many of them do not know how different a lifestyle can be besides what they see on television and in movies. Most don’t feel a sense that something is lacking because they have no basis of comparison. People living in rural Guatemala only know one thing. They do not know how bad they have it or how poor they really are until they know something better or easier. But those who have gone to the States understand. They know as well as I do about the luxury that the USA has to offer, simply because it is a developed nation, and I know that I get to back to that eventually. I sure don’t want to live in Guatemala for the rest of my life, and I am grateful for that choice.

Then there is that dream shared by practically everyone in the developing world to move to the United States—the land of the free—and start a life there. With how convenient it all is there, shoot, who wouldn’t want to go there? This brings me back around to this constant internal struggle I have regarding the issue of immigration to the United States. So many Guatemalans believe that if they can just get to the States, their life would be a breeze and they would have money and could easily buy everything they would need as well as things they want. But I wonder if there is a better way for the people here to create a healthy life for themselves without “escaping” to the United States where they think all their problems will be magically solved.

Just as Guatemalans may dream to go to the United States to live, many Americans/Europeans/etc. dream of a life of relaxation in Central America. In Guatemala, foreigners flock to Lago de Atitlan (Volcano San Pedro in the background). The building on the edge of the lake at the right-center of the photo is Casa del Mundo, a prime (and pricey) lodging for visitors boasting the highest comfort level and best view of the lake out of all the hotels/hostels in the surrounding area. On my Peace Corps budget, I have yet to stay there. Haha!

The relationship that these countries have with the US is that the people go up there (legal or not) to work and send money back to their families down here. Any “nice” house in a rural community is usually associated with having a family member in the States supplying the funding for quality construction materials and labor. Did I mention already that if anyone decides to visit the town of Providence, Rhode Island, they would probably run into a relative of at least half of the people living in my town (San Andrés)? Here, the theme of family resurfaces once again: the family is where one’s loyalty lies and thus where one’s money goes. Although immigration has its downsides, wasn’t America founded on immigrants? Don’t we all come from a line of immigration? So although I may not believe that patriotism toward the USA is the top priority of every immigrant who has most of their family living in the country they came from, I don’t know what right I have to judge who is allowed to come in and who is not. (This is as far as I am going to proceed here as this is a sticky topic, and I am not sure exactly where I stand, but I am just pointing out how I witness the system from this standpoint…)

No matter how you look at it though, the United States is regarded as a superior nation by many other countries—as well as US citizens! Consequently, money, gifts, and volunteerism get charitably pumped into the developing nations as “good people” have the desire to share their resources, skills, and/or wealth. Guatemalans (and many other “third-world country” citizens) are now accustomed to this “gringo system” in the sense that white foreigners show up randomly, bear gifts, stay for a short while, take some pictures, then leave. Or they have interaction with tourists who come here and spend money because “everything is so cheap!” Many people here have come to expect things from gringos, playing up the role that gringos have created for them—that of living such a poor, unfortunate life.

This presents a nice little roadblock in the PC line of work. We show up and people are expecting gifts and money from us. We are constantly interrogated with questions like, “What can you give us?” or “Oh, so why are you here exactly?” When people believe that I have something that would give them an advantage somehow, they have no shame in asking favors and, if you don’t say, “no,” people will continue to ask to see just how much they can get out of you.

Within the span of a week, these are the different favors I was asked for by Guatemalans: 1) I heard you have a computer, can you teach me how to use it? 2) Promise me that you’ll take me back to the States when you go. It has always been my dream to move to the USA. Will you get a Visa for me? 3) Can I use your computer to transfer pictures from my camera to my phone? All the other computers in town have viruses. 4) Can I have your stove when you leave? 5) Can I borrow 3,000 Quetzales? (By the way, that is more than I earn in my monthly living allowance.) The final request was from a bolo, or a drunk guy, following me around with an outstretched hand calling me gringa and telling me to give him a Quetzal. Not cool. At least it provides many opportunities to practice saying, “Sorry, but no, I do not have the means to do that.” Breaking through this stereotype that all gringos are rich is probably the motivation Peace Corps has to provide PCVs only with a living allowance sufficient for getting by at the same (or similar) standard of living as the people in our communities.

From this aspect, there is also another feeling associated with short-term gringos who come here for one to two weeks. I have felt both frustration at how they feed into the gift-bearing stereotype and envy toward them at the same time—especially during my first few months in site when things were so slow. I used to think how nice and easy it would be to just come in, tackle a project, and return home a few weeks later with a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment regarding the help or the things that were given to these “needy people.” Some days I wish I could just do some quick projects so I could feel a sense of immediate gratification and accomplishment. But that is not what the Peace Corps is about. We aren’t here to give gifts—we are here to form relationships.

Here I am with Carmen and her grand baby, Marleysi. Carmen is my go-to woman in Pajquiej, but we have developed a much closer friendship since we have been spending more time together.

Going back to the three PC goals, the way I understand the Peace Corps Mission is that we are here to promote peace and friendship through cultural interchange as well as provide trained professionals for developmental purposes. I hesitate to just give free handouts to people because there is no behavior change—they wouldn’t have to work for anything so they might never realize how much they are really capable of doing and achieving on their own. Plus, by bestowing gifts, we would only be facilitating the system of dependency on outside support. Our “work” can be so frustrating in this sense since there is a constant battle against the stereotypical views of Americans. (In addition to all PCVs fighting the idea that Americans are rich, the PCVs of different ethnicities also battle, every single day, the stereotype that ALL Americans are white.) When I look at my service in terms of relationships, I feel as though I am making an investment toward humanity—the important thing is that we are all just people who experience the same human emotions and difficulties, and who are all capable of contributing to the betterment of the world, one friendship or new idea at a time.

Maria and Juana are racing to “feed their children” during an activity I planned for our Reproductive Health & Family Planning charla with Mujeres de Vida Saludable. We always have so much fun in this group!

That’s it for this chapter. I will continue this theme in the remaining two worlds—that of the Peace Corps web and also of life and connections back home—in the next installment of this story. I received my first visitors (from home) to Guatemala in May and June and so have been on high adventure mode (with lots of quality time spent with my visitors) for the last month and a half. I will share more details of the fun we all had in my next chapter as well.

Love,

Alexandra

Semana Santa, or Holy Week, is the most celebrated holiday in Guatemala. Pretty much everyone gets the Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday off of work during the week before Easter Sunday; the entire country seems to shut down. We PCVs were allowed Thursday and Friday as vacation days so I was going to leave site on Thursay, but my plans were changed and I was forced out early once I was informed that there would be NO public transportation on Thursday and Friday—pretty much everywhere in the country! The transportation would pick up slowly on Saturday and be back in full force again on Sunday. So if you don’t own a car in this country, unless you headed to your destination on Wednesday, you would have been stuck wherever you were basically until Sunday.

Most of us headed out of site toward the popular Semana Santa destinations in Guatemala including Antigua, Panajachel, and the beach. In fact, throngs of Guatemalans and tourists alike swarm the beaches during this week. It’s like Easter Week has an automatic association with “beach time.” I decided to avoid most of the crowds and head to my host family’s home in Alotenango since I hadn’t seen them since January. They live close enough to Antigua that I could participate and observe the Semana Santa goings-on there as well.

Although Holy Week in Guatemala is most intensely celebrated by Catholics, there are some traditions that are practiced by the entirety of the country. I won’t go into too much detail regarding the religious history and tendencies of Guatemalans right now, but basically the Ladino population—or Guatemalans with European ancestry—practices Catholicism whereas the indigenous, more rural-living population adheres to Protestant beliefs (mostly Evangelical) or traditional Maya rituals and customs. Semana Santa traditions, however, exhibit a fluid blend of both Spanish and Maya culture and religion.

The most common shared traditions are regarding special Semana Santa foods, namely bread and fish. (Does Jesus’s loaves and fishes miracle ring a bell, anyone?) In any household with an oven, families and friends come together at the beginning of the week, starting on Palm Sunday, to crack eggs, mix batter, add sugar, and bake loaf after loaf of bread—mostly sweet breads at that—through the week up until Good Friday. Everyone in the country eats endless amounts of bread during Holy Week. I was visiting one home in the community I work in and was amazed at the level of dedication at which the women made their loaves—and the joy they shared in the fellowship together. I swear all the bread in that house that was dumped into large baskets or spread across tables and benches to cool could have filled an entire small room—or half a room, at least! I was told that the bread baking and eating custom is representative of the bread Jesus broke at the Last Supper.

The other traditional food that is eaten during Semana Santa is fish, and Good Friday is usually the day to eat it during a big lunch with the family. Many Guatemalans buy pescado seco, or dry fish, from the market or maybe a grocery store (if they live in an urban area). The fish is usually cooked by covering it in a light [egg] batter, then frying it. In some households, the tradition is to serve the fish accompanied by pacaya, (a special edible plant that I’m pretty sure is native to Guatemala or at least Central America) with rice on the side and maybe a thin, tomato-based sauce on top. I enjoyed a very traditional belated Good Friday meal a few days after Easter with a family I like to visit. When I inquired about the type of fish we were eating, they told me tiburón. It took me a second to register the translation, and the shocked look on my face was quite visible as I realized I was eating shark, which I had never eaten before and was very surprised to find in the middle of Guatemala. It was definitely tasty (although rather salty)!

The two most important things associated with Semana Santa are processions and alfombras, or carpets. As far as festivities are concerned, everything begins on Holy Thursday. The processions that take place are essentially a reenactment of Jesus’s last days on Earth and loosely resemble the Stations of the Cross including Jesus’s Passion, Crucifixion, and Resurrection. The processions are organized and carried out by the Catholic Church, but thousands of people come from near and far to line the streets and witness Jesus passing by in the days leading up to Easter.

Jesus is moved through the streets in the form of a large, detailed float carried by men who rotate in teams. (These “processional carriers” are part of the brotherhood of each particular sculpture/float of the various churches.) The carrying teams are chosen very carefully, depending on each person’s height to ensure that the float—which can weigh up to 7,000 pounds—is even. They have an intricate system of how they advance, slowly rocking from side to side in a forward direction, pausing every now and then to move backward a couple steps before proceeding in the forward direction once again. (It’s like 3 lengths forward, 1 length back.) The floats are either preceded or followed by a marching band playing the ominous pre-tragedy or funeral tune—bum-da-dumm…ba-da-dum-da-dum-doo-dumm—over and over again. Each procession leaves from its church and moves through the designated routes in town, crossing over the alfombras laid down by the residents, before returning to the church anywhere between 6 and 9 hours later; the float carriers are the first ones in the procession who are allowed to step on each carpet as they pass.

On Holy Thursday, the theme of the procession is Jesus carrying the cross through the streets of Jerusalem. I watched this one from the roof of my host family’s house in Alotenango with my host sister, Helen, who explained a lot of the customs to me. The floats support various figures who share a part in Jesus’s story, including Jesus himself, saints, angels, apostles, Mary, and even the grim reaper, and can be extremely dramatic. The processions come complete with Roman soldiers decked out in their red and gold costumes. On Holy Thursday, all the float carriers line the routes wearing purple robes (which happens to be the official color of Semana Santa, as deemed by both Guatemalans and the Catholic Church). Also, in both the Holy Thursday and Good Friday processions, there is always a smaller float of Jesus’s mother, Mary, that follows closely behind and is carried by women in skirts with white veils over their heads.

The Roman soldiers leading the Holy Thursday procession in Alotenango.

Holy Thursday float with Jesus carrying cross, preceded by the grim reaper, through Aotenango.

Close-up of a very sad Virgin Mary on the float behind her Son on Holy Thursday.

Good Friday is the most important day of Holy Week in Guatemala. Shops are closed, public transportation is non-existent, and people generally don’t do any work—women don’t even make tortillas that day! Good Friday processions begin at 3 or 4 in the morning and continue throughout the day. I think I was awakened three different times in the middle of that night by that loud somber tune played by trumpeters and drummers announcing the arrival of Jesus in the streets; by the third time, the tune was so engraved in my mind that I wasn’t sure if I was humming along with it or just dreaming. The themes of the processions are Jesus’s crucifixion during the day, and then Jesus being taken down from the cross and laid to rest in the nighttime hours; the float carriers wear black robes on this day.

Good Friday nighttime procession of Jesus being laid to rest; the thick incense being burned all around the float has a haunting effect as the procession passes by.

This is the float of the Virgin Mary that followed Jesus’s float (after His death) on Good Friday.

I was lucky enough to have the opportunity to participate in the carpet-laying tradition while I was in Alotenango. When I first started hearing people talk of the famous alfombras that are made during Semana Santa, I pictured woven rugs all over the streets and couldn’t figure out what people were going to do with the special rugs when the week was over. I was pleased to learn that the carpets laid on the streets are meant for “one-time use” only—being essentially destroyed once a procession crosses over them— and represent the “carpets” of palm fronds that were laid down for Jesus on the streets in Jerusalem to prevent him from burning his feet as he walked through town. Now, in Guatemala, the people make alfombras as a way to honor Christ as he passes [via float] on the streets through their towns.

This is what the streets look like with fully-prepared carpets just before the procession passes over them (destroying them) on Holy Thursday in Alotenango.

Here I am, helping some friends in Alotenango create their alfombra for the Good Friday procession.

Here is our finished carpet, complete with pine needles, flowers, lettuce, radishes, bell peppers, and mangoes!

People use all sorts of materials to make their alfombras. The objective is to display opulence and thus lay down the nicest things possible as a sacrifice for the Lord. The carpets tend to be detailed and colorful, made up of anything from pine needles, flowers, and roses to fruits and vegetables to [specially-dyed just for Semana Santa] sawdust and even candles. Each family has its own design and method for their alfombras, and it is rare to see any two carpets exactly alike. I think this is such a beautiful custom because, in addition to remembering and honoring Christ’s journey and sacrifice, it is an event during which families unite and everyone participates in the carpet-making together.

Young and old alike work together to create this ornate carpet that includes roses, among many other types of flowers and petals.

This family is creating a carpet with intricate patterns and rigid lines using the traditional brightly-colored sawdust.

This carpet—which has watermelons, cantaloupes, pineapples, and mangoes—exudes a candlelit glow in the dark night.

As I walked through town on Friday evening to view all the other alfombras, I was completely amazed and impressed at the level of creativity exhibited in this little community. It isn’t just in Alotenango, though—creativity and resourcefulness are part of the beating pulse of this country. The art that people are able to create with their hands here is something that many “westernized” cultures have fallen out of touch with (at least somewhat). But here in Guatemala, where “the many” live on very limited financial means, it seems a necessary skill to be able to think outside the box and be creative in order to have beautiful or nice things without having to spend too much money. Plus, there is a certain sense of personal pride one feels when he or she can say, “I made it” instead of “I bought it.”

This ornate carpet is based on pine needles, pineapple, a few candles, and an abundance of flower petals!

A very creative carpet of fruit!

On Saturday, I headed to Antigua to meet up with a couple other PCVs and observe the festivities there. My friend Kathy’s parents were visiting for the week, so we had fun hanging out with them during the afternoon and taking them around to various markets so they could do their last-minute shopping before flying home the next day. Antigua was still jam-packed with people, of course, and the streets were filled with vendors selling such things as that which one might find at a carnival—light-up toys, cotton candy, popcorn, street food, and various other snacks and goodies. In the evening, there were two more processions, each starting at a different major church in Antigua and following a different route through town—until late in the night. By this point in the week, some of us onlookers were getting a little bored with standing around waiting for processions to pass and checking out alfombras (after all, it IS the same thing for 3 non-stop days), so we made our evening a little more exciting by zig-zagging through the streets of Antigua chasing down the routes of the processions, trying to beat them and find a good viewing spot before they passed.

Frank, me, and Kathy, out to lunch in Antigua on the Saturday before Easter.

Saturday is a very special day during Semana Santa because it is entirely devoted to the Virgin Mary, the Mother of God. The floats that pass through the streets do not carry Jesus, but Mary, full of grace, alone in her grieving, yet hopeful, state. Interestingly enough, of all the processions I witnessed, it was during the Saturday processions where I noticed people in the crowds exhibiting the greatest degree of reverence. I was also told that at 10 PM on Saturday night, the Body of Christ is removed from the tabernacle and a black flag is hoisted over the church building as a representation that Catholic Church does not exist from the time Jesus’s body is removed until His Resurrection on Easter morning. An all-night vigil for Mary then ensues until the dawn.

A sorrowful Mary, dressed in black, passes in front of the cathedral in Antigua. She is no longer following the footsteps of her Son; instead she makes this journey alone.

The Saturday night procession from the other church displays their float of a reflective Mary alone with the angels.

Now Sunday arrives! Woo-hoo! The BIG day of Christ’s Resurrection! In the United States, this day, Easter Sunday, has the most significance and is the most celebrated of all the days of Holy Week. It is usually a day that families spend together, (maybe the Easter bunny comes to hide eggs and deliver Easter baskets full of jelly beans, robin eggs, malt balls, and peeps), and Christians thank God for sending His only Son to die on the cross in order to pay for our sins and give us everlasting life. Hallelujah! Christ has risen! Right? Well, in Guatemala, the culmination of three full days of mourning and processions leads all the way up to about twenty minutes of celebration on Sunday morning, and then Semana Santa is over. Resurrection Sunday isn’t really all that important in Guatemala. There are no special meals or parades or anything like what is characteristic of any previous day during the week. The attitude feels something like this: “Sweet. Jesus rose from the dead, just like we expected and were waiting for all week. Awesome. All right—everyone back to reality now.” And that is Semana Santa in Guatemala for you!

After enjoying an Easter breakfast with a couple other PCVs at a restaurant with a rooftop terrace overlooking Antigua, here I am with Derc, an RPCV who COS’d in March (but decided to stay in Guatemala for a while).

This was my first Easter out of the country and away from my family, and it was definitely weird, especially since Easter last year was on April 24^th, the day before I left to join the Peace Corps. Easter this year made me realize that I was coming up on my 1-year anniversary with Peace Corps and reflect a little bit on all the wonderful things that have happened in the last year. I’m in such a better place—mentally, emotionally, and spiritually—now than I was last year. I am so grateful for the time I have been given to serve as a Peace Corps Volunteer here in Guatemala! As of April 27^th, my PCV friends from my training group and I (there are 45 out of 52 of us still here) were proud to say that we have been living abroad for a whole year now. There has been a lot of change and growth among each and every one of us as we have learned to exist as a part of four different worlds. In my next chapter, I will explore where and how we fit into those “four worlds.”

Love,

Alexandra

EXTRA! EXTRA!

Please say a little prayer for the families of two Guatemalan PC staff members who both recently passed away. Katarina Isabel Xiloj, who had an operation for a brain tumor in January, was a Language and Cultural Facilitator who taught both Spanish and K’iche’; she died in February. Sergio Mack, who had a stroke in March and went into a coma then passed on, was the Associate Peace Corps Director in charge of the Healthy Schools program in Guatemala. *There is a scholarship fund that has been set up through the organization “Friends of Guatemala” for Katarina’s 5-year-old son, Fernando Colop Xiloj. Please contact me for details if you have interest in donating to the fund.*

Congratulations to my college friend Agustina (and the man of her dreams, Chris) on your upcoming wedding (in one week)! I really wish I could be there!

Congratulations to my two cousins, Robert & Sheldon, for completing Air Force basic training and graduating at the tops of their classes. Also a BIG congratulations to my cousin, Robert, on his marriage proposal to his girlfriend, Anita. (She said YES!)

Thank you to Norm, Elease, and Mom for the recent care packages! Mucho appreciation here!!! (With all the goodies I have been sent, I think I am set for the rest of my service with Kleenex, wet wipes, soaps, deodorant, toothbrushes, razors, cotton balls, lotions, hand sanitizer, and the like. One can never have enough peanut butter or chocolate, though!)

When Daylight Savings happened in March and everyone who participates in Daylight Savings “sprung forward” an hour, Guatemalan time didn’t change so now my time is only one hour ahead of (later than) California time (PST). Yippee!

From a PCV standpoint, the events leading up to the changes:

In the middle of December, all PCVs were notified that Peace Corps Honduras was temporarily suspending all programs and sending volunteers home in January for an initial month in order to reassess the security situation of the country to see whether it is safe for PCVs to continue serving there. We were also informed that the groups of PC trainees that were supposed to arrive in both Guatemala (about 50 PCTs) and El Salvador at the beginning of January were no longer going to come. We were told that PC Guatemala, PC El Salvador, and PC Belize were all “under review.” This news stirred a bit of anxiety among the PCV population as we all knew that there would be many changes on the horizon, although we didn’t know exactly what those changes would be…

During the first week of January, just as I returned to Guatemala after vacation, we all received a letter from our Country Director offering every current volunteer the option to IS, or take an Interrupted Service, if they personally felt that continuing service in Guatemala would pose a threat to their personal safety and security. Opting for the IS basically means that a volunteer has to withdraw from their country of service for “reasons beyond his or her control” before formally completing their service. Those who IS receive the status and most of the benefits (which will be discussed later) of being an RPCV, or Returned Peace Corps Volunteer.

Within two weeks of that letter, we were notified of the upcoming changes PC Guatemala was about to make, including sending some volunteers home early and displacing other volunteers whose sites were deemed to be in “unsafe” areas. We were also all called to an impromptu 3-day All Volunteer Conference during which the people in charge of PC Guatemala could explain why the decision was made to implement these changes.

Besides volunteers, the attendance at the conference included the majority of PC staff in Guatemala, PC trainers, two or three counselors, the Director of Programming and Training, Craig Badger, and the Country Director, Martha Keays. In addition to that, several people from Peace Corps Headquarters in Washington, D.C., including Deputy Associate Director for Global Operations at Peace Corps, Peter Redmond, and Peace Corps Regional Director (Inter American and Pacific), Carlos Torres, played a huge part in the conference in that they communicated to us the bigger picture and a little bit about what is going on behind the scenes and how PC Guatemala reached the decisions they have made. A synopsis of the situation follows.

What is the safety and security situation in PC Central America?

There is a section of Central America referred to as the “Northern Triangle,” which consists of three countries: Honduras, Guatemala, and El Salvador; it is considered a relatively dangerous part in the world (active war zones, of course, being the most dangerous countries) due to the elevated crime rates. (Honduras is by far the worst.) From what I have gathered, the main causes of the problems in Central America right now are drugs and poverty. Thanks to the high demand for narcotics in the United States and the lucrative nature of the drug business, drag trafficking and all the problems that come with it have become extremely prevalent in Central America. (Colombia, near the top of South America, is generally known as the “home base” for drugs, especially cocaine; the routes traverse from there up through the seven Central American countries and Mexico into the States.)

Bus assaults in all of these countries have also been problematic and have unfortunately become an almost everyday occurrence in some countries in this area. I have briefly mentioned these in previous posts, but to sum it up, a typical bus assault is an armed robbery on public transportation. It usually involves two men with weapons who tell everyone to give them all their stuff; a typical assault may last 10-15 minutes during which the offenders quickly search all purses, backpacks, bags, and pockets for money, credit cards, and valuables. We have been trained to hand everything over, avoid eye contact, and not make a scene. Most of the time, the robberies are harmless; only when a passenger has turned a weapon on the offenders do things get out of control.

In the past several months, there have been a handful of “serious incidents” reported involving PCVs in Honduras, Guatemala, and Belize which has led the guys in charge in Washington, D.C. to assess the situations in these countries and make some changes. In Honduras, the incident was that a female PCV got shot in the leg when caught in the crossfire between a passenger and an assailant during a bus assault on a camioneta (chicken bus). In Guatemala, six female PCVs were all robbed during a bus assault that occurred in Guatemala City at the end of Thanksgiving weekend. (They were headed back to their sites after returning from Río Dulce and Lívingston.) In Belize, a male PCV was the victim of an armed robbery where he lived.

The statistic for Guatemala is that an average of 10% of all PCVs who reach their Close-of-Service (COS) and complete 27 months in country have experienced a serious crime during their service. The guys at Headquarters are not pleased with this little tidbit. And so the changes commence…

A note on the new presidency in Guatemala:

On January 15, Guatemala witnessed the presidential inauguration of Otto Pérez Molina and the regime of partido patriota (the Patriot Party) began. This political party seems very well organized and has a lot of support. One should note, though, that Otto Pérez Molina has an extensive military background and was a General during the civil war in Guatemala that ended in 1996. (He was on the side against the indigenous people, but the war is over now, so what does it matter, right?) In any case, with the change of government, our Safety and Security Coordinator (SSC), David Castillo, has been monitoring the state of affairs under the new administration in order to make sure PCVs stay safe in the country.

In addition to Pérez Molina’s talk of the possibility of legalizing drugs in Guatemala, there is one big action that the new president is about to take that will certainly affect some volunteers. He is about to place the department of San Marcos (which borders the Pacific Ocean and Mexico) under a State of Siege in order to buckle down and gain some sort of control over the drug trafficking problem in that area. A State of Siege means that the military takes over the jurisdiction of the entire department and can detain any person without warning or reason—meaning civil rights are out the window. If a PCV gets detained, there would be no guarantee that the US could protect him or get his rights instilled for several days. That is a risk that PC is not willing to take, and so all the PCVs living in San Marcos right now are being displaced and the department is now “off-limits” for travel to all PCVs.

Are volunteers and foreigners the ones being targeted?

No. The incidents that have occurred against PCVs were not pre-planned against foreigners. It has simply been a matter of being at the wrong place at the wrong time. When I swore in in July, there were approximately 270 PCVs in country. The sheer number of us increases the risk factor against a PCV. PC is taking steps to reduce the number of volunteers floating around the country.

The drug trafficking incidents in Guatemala occur mainly along the borders of the surrounding countries (Mexico, Honduras, El Salvador, & [barely] Belize), in the capital, Guatemala City, and along two major routes that run through the northern part of the country into Mexico (through the huge department of the Petén, which has been “off-limits” to PCVs since before I arrived in Guatemala). The majority of reported incidents that involved PCVs have occurred in Guatemala City.

Bus assaults and robberies usually take place on public transportation, and most frequently just outside of Guatemala City. PCVs are not allowed to go to Guatemala City without special permission, and PC is setting up a private transport system for PCVs to get around to certain places in the country now in order to get us off public transportation in the problematic areas. There are also private shuttles from travel agencies that PCVs and tourists often use for big trips, as well as taxis that are all very safe.

As far as tourists go, they generally tend to only be targets of petty crimes such as pick pocketing, and it usually happens in more of a crowded atmosphere. Most of the tourists/foreigners I have encountered don’t even know about bus assaults and drug-related crimes because they don’t frequent the “hot zones” and they generally can afford to take taxis or private shuttles that keep them off the public transportation systems in the cities.

What are the options that PC considers in regards to protecting volunteers in these countries?

Option A: In Country Management.

Option B: Mandatory Administrative Hold in the U.S.; Select Return.

Option C: Immediate Suspension.

When a country in which PC is working reaches the point of a required security reassessment, the guys in charge decide which of the three options listed above is appropriate. For Honduras, they chose Option B which means everything in the country in regards to PC progress is paused. All the PCVs from Honduras are currently home in the United States waiting to hear if they will be allowed to continue their service. I suspect that many volunteers will decide not to return to Honduras even if they are given that opportunity. For Guatemala and El Salvador, Option A was chosen. The details of “in country management” are below.

What is the plan for PC Guatemala?

Peace Corps has served in Guatemala for 49 years straight, since 1963. Even throughout the 36-year civil war, PC has had a presence in this country. The closest PC ever was to getting pulled out was at the height of the civil war in 1982 when the violence was the hottest. The new force that threatens safety and security is drug trafficking; however, there is no intention to terminate the PC program in Guatemala.

In country management is basically a numbers game. As of about a month ago at the All Volunteer Conference, there were 213 PCVs serving in Guatemala. We were informed at the conference that Headquarters wants the number of PCVs down to between 100 and 120, and they want it to drop fast. They are also re-focusing our geographical coverage and consolidating volunteers in the Central Western Highlands of Guatemala. They have taken the following immediate actions with no exceptions:

~All incoming groups of trainees (in five different programs) for Guatemala have been suspended for the entire year of 2012. (Those PC invitees will be assigned different countries in which to serve.)

~All PCVs who were scheduled to complete their 27-month service and COS (close-of-service) in March are being forced to leave by the end of February, one month early.

~ All PCVs who were scheduled to complete their 27-month service and COS in July are being forced to leave by the end of March, four months early.

~All PCVs in the outlying departments to the east and west of the deemed “Central Western Highlands” are being pulled out of their sites and offered either a relocation site or the option to take an Early COS.

~Every single currently-serving PCV, whether they are being displaced or not and no matter how much time they have served, has been given the option to take an Early COS and be out of the country by the end of March. All PCVs must make their final decisions by March 2^nd.

What is so great about the option to Early COS?

It’s a free ticket. It documents that a PCV has successfully completed his or her commitment to service—even if the entire time commitment isn’t fulfilled.

There are several ways for a PCV to part with the Peace Corps. First a PCV can decide to ET (Early Termination); Pedro did this is November. When it comes to the benefits for a PCV, an ET is BAD. It basically means that the volunteer quit and thus forfeits the title of RPCV (Returned Peace Corps Volunteer) and all the good things that come with that (discussed in the next section). The redeemable aspect of this type of separation is that it is in a PCV’s control. Anyone can decide to ET at any time for any reason. Pedro is probably kicking himself right now because he could have received all the benefits if he had held out for two months, but how could he have known that all this was going to happen? (He is actually doing really well back at home with both school and great job offers lined up for him already!)

Another method of parting ways is if PC basically kicks a volunteer out. This can happen in either of two circumstances: medical separation or administrative separation. Med-sep is when PC deems that a PCV is in too dire condition to continue service or that the medical needs of a PCV cannot be met in country. This obviously isn’t a good thing, but it doesn’t look bad on the PCV record because that is something out of one’s control. To be admin-sep’d is BAD. This is when a PCV violates the non-negotiables (a set of strict rules we have). Two PCVs from my training group were administratively separated in January for breaking the rules (and getting caught). This is the harshest type of separation from the PC. There are no benefits and it carries the worst connotation.

The last two ways are the Interrupted Service, in which the PCV gets most of the RPCV benefits, and of course, the COS—an official close of service. For a COS, each PCV completes a COS report and a description of service. This is the stamp of a “job well-done” as a volunteer is promoted to RPCV status. The COS is granted upon the completion of 27 hard months of service without throwing in the towel.

But now, ALL volunteers have the option to “complete service” without completing service, per se. Headquarters is making so many changes and trying to get the number of volunteers down so desperately that they are offering this “gift” to Early COS to all volunteers.

What are the benefits that come with being a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer (RPCV)?

1)     The title and status of RPCV. There is a whole community of RPCVs in which the new RPCV can be a part of. This is also great for resumés and job applications. Lastly, it gives the volunteer a sense of pride and accomplishment.

2)     The Fellows Program. There are between 50-60 universities in the U.S. that participate in the Fellows Program and reserve spots for RPCVs to pursue graduate studies. Many of the universities also offer RPCVs grants and scholarships as well as a study-related job or internship position while they are attending grad school.

3)     Re-application for a new Peace Corps post. Upon COS, an RPCV will receive priority consideration for a new post if he or she decides to sign up for another PC service in a different country. The tedious yearlong application process that we all went through no longer applies. The title of RPCV basically proves to PC recruiters and placement officers that the person has done it already, knows what to expect, and accepts the responsibility that comes along with service. I think an RPCV might even have a say in his country-of-choice, as well.

4)     Non-competitive Eligibility. If an RPCV wants to work for the federal government after completing service and applies for a job, he or she will be considered for the position non-competitively over the general public for up to a year after COS.

5)     Peace Corps Response. This is a program that entails PC type work on a short-term basis (usually no longer than one year) in other countries around the world. I am pretty sure the program is only available to RPCVs.

6)     Readjustment allowance & Perkins Loan reductions. Both of these depend entirely on one’s length of service, not the RPCV status. Readjustment allowance begins accruing monthly at swear-in (after 3 months of training); a typical readjustment allowance will account for 24 months of service. The Perkins Loan deal is that the government will reduce the total amount owed by 15% for each year of service.

What are the increased measures that PC Guatemala has taken in regard to volunteer support and safety?

At the conference, we were well informed of the implications that all volunteers who choose to stay will face including new rules that will require a greater commitment on the part of PCVs. Naturally, the implementation of stricter rules can make a person feel stripped of his or her independence, but these changes are easy to accept when considering the main goal which is our safety and security. The changes and policies are explained below.

~ Clearer expectations on policies/Reporting of Whereabouts. PCVs are given three weekend nights every month as “personal time away from site” which we can spend however we like (as long as we are not breaking any other policies). Anytime we spend the night somewhere besides our own town/site, we must report our out-of-site location and contact information via phone or e-mail so PC can keep track of us in the event of an emergency situation. PC is also working on how to better communicate suggestions versus mandatory policies to the PCV population.

~ Extension of “off-limits” areas. These are part of the non-negotiables, and if a PCV is found in an “off-limits” area, it is grounds for administrative separation. As of right now, the departments of El Petén and San Marcos are “off-limits” as well as Guatemala City and several unsafe roads and well-known narcotic zones. PCVs are required to get special permission if they need to travel to any of these places. Really the only “off-limits” place we ever need to go is Guatemala City for medical appointments or to meet our visitors at the airport.

~ Family home stays and safe hotels. Starting with my training group last April, PC changed policy and now requires that all PCVs live with a host family or in a family compound for the duration of their service abroad as opposed to living alone. For when we are traveling, our SSC, David, has researched areas that provide safe hotels/hostels (some even with security cameras) and has provided PCVs with these recommendations.

~Cell phone plan. All PCVs in Guatemala have this fantastic cell phone plan that allows us not only to stay updated on important communications and safety alerts, road conditions, etc. via text message from our SSC, but also to talk amongst each other for free! How cool is that?

~Transportation system and shuttle service. This is probably the most important and beneficial change to PC Guatemala. Our SSC, David, has set up routes and shuttle schedules for a transportation system available to all PCVs. The main routes run to and from the PC office in Santa Lucia and Guatemala City, and along the inter-American highway. Our new “Peace Corps shuttles,” if used effectively by PCVs, will eliminate the majority of our exposure to precarious situations on the public transportation in the “hot zones.” (Friends, co-workers, and visitors from the States also have access to the PC shuttles when they are traveling with us.)

~Regional Offices. Right now, the main PC office is located in Santa Lucia Milpas Altas near Antigua. Another PC office has recently been opened and is fully functioning in Xela, which requires some PVCs to travel much shorter distances to take care of any office business or pick up medical supplies/prescription refills. The advantage PC Guate has over Honduras, Belize, and El Salvador is that the PC offices are NOT located in the capital city (whereas in the other 3 countries they are). Capital cities are known for crime rates that are through the roof.

~All Volunteer Conference. This was called to realistically inform all PCVs of the current situation and give us the opportunity to get all our questions answered. This is also where we were presented with the option to Early COS. At the conference, outreach to volunteers was offered regarding safety and counseling. Also, resources such as resumé writing workshops and RPCV services were available for those volunteers COSing. Recruiters for Peace Corps Response and other PC posts were present as well.

How are PCVs responding to all the changes?

Well, it was a difficult week for everyone at the conference. People’s moods ranged from angry, sad, and reluctant to nonchalant, satisfied, relieved, or conflicted and confused. The PCVs who are being forced to COS one month early seem to be okay with that decision; they were on their way out anyway. All they have to do is make a few small adjustments.

The PCVs who are being forced out four months early are the most upset. The majority of them are just about to implement the infrastructure projects in their communities and those who have not yet received funding will most likely not be able to complete them. They feel helpless and can’t believe that the Peace Corps will just leave all those families hanging—those families with whom they have worked, formed close relationships, and made promises of these projects. Many of these volunteers pleaded to PC officials to let them stay until their projects were completed but all PCVs were denied that request and must COS by the end of March. Needless to say, it was an emotional week for this bunch.

Those volunteers who are being removed from their sites and relocated are not happy either, for the most part. Many of them feel very safe in their sites and are right in the middle of their work. They have already done the hard part of being new to a site and have gained the trust of the people with whom they live and work in their sites. In response to getting a site change, the general feeling is that no one really wants to start from scratch again in a brand new community, especially if he or she has less than a year left of service. Some PCVs feel that it would be better to COS now if they don’t believe they will work whole-heartedly for the remainder of their service in a brand new community. Other PCVs, although sad to leave their original communities, are being flexible to the changes and open to continuing service in a new site. (Many of the PCVs being relocated will be replacing the PCVs who are being forced to leave several months early.)

There is another type of volunteer who is relieved by all the changes and the Early COS option. Some PCVs may have struggled getting their work going in site or may have been dealing with other types of hardship here and are ecstatic at this opportunity. Some are just taking all this business as a sign that it is time to move on with their lives. Others are disappointed in Peace Corps and don’t want to continue working with an organization in which they have lost trust. Some are watching their entire social network of friends be forced out early and thus do not want to stay. Still others have just been downright frightened into leaving early.

How am I affected by all of this?

And then there is the PCV category into which I fall: the unaffected. Directly, I am hardly affected at all. They are not asking me to leave early before I finish my work nor to change sites and start all over again. It turns out that the department of El Quiché, where my site is located, happens to be one of the safest parts of the country right now. Lucky me! In fact, many of the PCVs being relocated are moving to sites in Quiché.

Being in this situation could be seen as both a blessing and a curse for us “unaffected” PCVs. It is a blessing because we are not being messed with; our worlds are not being turned upside down. We can stay right where we are and continue our business just as we always had before all these changes. We do not have to grieve over time being cut short or having to abandon a community and the people with whom we are building relationships.

On the other hand, this position is a bit of a curse. Many of us sat through the conference hesitant to put in our two-sense because we were surrounded by a bunch of angry PCVs who had all the right in the world to be upset. We tried to be empathetic, however, we just weren’t dealing with the same issues at the moment; it was really just better to stay quiet, listen to those who wanted to vent, and offer support where needed. The second con of this position is that we are offered the Early COS option same as everyone else, but it feels that we do not have rights to take it without being looked upon contemptuously by PCVs who would give anything to stay but are being forced to leave. In this position, one may also experience a sense of guilt in “quitting.”

Indirectly, I am affected at every angle. There will be new rules and policies to which I will have to adapt if I stay. The whole Peace Corps dynamic is going to shift. I’m watching half of the PC Guatemala network vanish practically into thin air so there is a huge sense of loss, especially when a handful of my friends are leaving. There is the “group mentality” effect to combat as well when one realizes that “everyone else is doing it.” Also to consider is the fact that all the 2^nd-year Healthy Homes PVCs are going to be gone in March; they are primary resources for my group! They know the how-to for our program, and they are the people I look up to for some ideas, guidance, and advice. It feels like we are graduating from newbies to veterans in the blink of an eye. Pretty soon, my group is going to be leading PC Guatemala into the future.

What are my thoughts?

There are days when I wonder, “What the heck is this little gringa doing wandering all over this country?” I do get lonely, bored, and frustrated every now and then. I wonder how much of a difference my work is really going to make. I can pretty much guarantee that every single PCV out here has considered taking that tempting free ticket and COSing early. In fact, I bet they have relentlessly churned those thoughts in their heads for the past month. I know I have.

My family is at home. Both my sister and my best friend are pregnant. I could be a part of all of that. I have thought, “Wouldn’t it be nice to be out of all this dust and mud and be clean all the time? Or to breathe fresh air and ride in my own car?” Also, it would be nice to have clean running water all the time as opposed to just for a couple hours every morning. I would have a washing machine, dryer, hot showers, and the like. I even have a job that I know I could go back to. I could begin my pursuit toward further education, or I could chase some old ideas I had before like pursuing dental hygiene or moving to Austin, TX to see what I could find out there. Or I just might run off to some other part of the world like New Zealand or Argentina or someplace like that.

I know of a handful of other PCVs who are still on the fence regarding their decision. My friend, Kathy, is being pulled out of her site in Huehuetenango and facing either site relocation or an Early COS. She is deep in her work and has a group of health promoters that she is training; they are supposed to graduate in July. She was struggling for the longest time about her decision. She even considered COSing but staying in her community on her own dime until she finished what she started. Of course I don’t want to see Kathy go because we have been through a lot together and always have so much fun, but Peace Corps is an individual experience, and everyone needs to make the decision that is best for him or herself. It becomes more obvious each day how each person out here has to learn how to stand alone and be comfortable with that. Kathy has recently decided to stay and take the site relocation, but all of us would have supported her decision either way.

The Peace Corps that we are currently experiencing is probably not what a lot of PCVs had in mind. Some of the PCVs here are being forced to cut their experience short without having the planned amount of time for proper closure—whether having to do with work, projects, or personal relationships gained here. Other PCVs are deciding that since this isn’t what they asked for and there is no guarantee the experience they expected will ever materialize, they are going to go home or find something else to do or sign up for a new PC assignment somewhere else in hopes to get that sense of fulfillment that they may be pursuing. There are those PCVs who are sticking it out with an open mind as to what will happen in the future, accepting the idea that things could get better or that they could get pulled out anytime, but they are going to do as much as they can each day that they have here because that is what they have committed to, and it feels right in their hearts to stay.

I have noticed a lot of parallels between being in the Peace Corps and being in a relationship. No relationship is perfect, right? There are always unexpected bumps in the road, and sometimes things don’t turn out exactly as we picture them in our idealistic visions and daydreams. Often though, if you love someone enough to be willing to work through the difficult times and put your heads together to create new solutions, the end result may end up being better than you could have ever imagined. Patience, persistence, flexibility. Time will tell. It is interesting to ponder all the factors that affect one’s decisions. The slightest change in some aspect of a person’s life could affect his or her path forever. But time will unveil what is meant to be. If you’re willing to stick it out, trust God’s plan, and see what happens, good things may come your way…

I haven’t done what I came here to do yet. I’m just getting started. I am reenergized and feel like this is going to be a great year. I made a commitment to serve here for 27 months, but I told myself that if I felt that my personal safety was in danger or got a gut feeling that I need to leave for whatever reason, I would listen to my intuition and go home. But I haven’t had any strong force pushing me to leave yet, and trust me, I’ve been waiting for that little voice to tell me something. If they pull us out, there is nothing I can do about it, but since I have the choice, I am going to stay. Plus, when else am I going to have the opportunity to be a certified, off-road tour guide to my handful of prospective visitors looking for a true Guatemalan adventure?

What is the future looking like for PC Guatemala?

By the time all is said and done on March 24^th, the final COS date for this big wave of volunteers, it looks like there are only going to be somewhere between 80-100 PCVs serving in Guatemala. Those PCVs will be consolidated within five or six departments in the Central Western highlands and will have a hand in reshaping the identity of Peace Corps in Guatemala.

Of course, anything could happen. Although it is unlikely that a big change and drop in numbers will occur again anytime soon, we are all well aware that we may be pulled out of the country at anytime, regardless if we feel that our work is incomplete. Knowing that, I believe that the remaining PCVs will be fully devoted to each day they have here.

EXTRA! EXTRA!

Thank you, Teri, Dad, and Lyndsie for the wonderful Valentine’s Day package! The personal letters were my favorite part.

There are several species of ground squirrel, however, that practice kin selection via altruistic behavior in order to protect the genetic code of all of its relatives (which apparently have a very similar genetic blueprint), not just itself and its own offspring. These ground squirrels live together in groups and, one at a time, each grown squirrel will take a turn standing watch for danger while the others forage for food or play in the fields. Altruism is the behavior in which an animal is willing to sacrifice its own life for the safety and well being of another—in this case, its relatives. When a predator approaches, the squirrel standing watch will start making high-pitched calls not only to alert the other squirrels of the nearing danger but also to draw attention to itself while its relatives scurry to safety. Instead of trying to escape for its own survival at the first sign of danger, the squirrel makes itself a target, thus ensuring at least a good portion of its genes are preserved through its relatives.

Humans exhibit a similar type of behavior when it comes to their relatives as well, although I’m sure it doesn’t usually get to such extreme conditions like for the ground squirrel. (Last time I checked, humans don’t come into contact with predators on a regular basis.) This tight-knit family bond is obvious in Latin American societies, and it is something that I have had endless opportunity to observe while living in Guatemala. There is that saying “blood is thicker than water,” and it’s all about survival of the bloodline here. I have learned a lot about loyalty since I do not have my family here, I am not blood-related to anyone out here, and I do not have a child who is half blood-related to any of the population. I’m starting to believe that some of the people I spend time with care about me and might watch out for me, but I have been flaked on enough times for “family reasons” that I know, if it ever gets down to the wire, no person here really has my back.

My mom always used to tell us, “Family first.” She encouraged us to spend time together and look out for each other, and she even forced my two older sisters and I to give each other hugs and apologize or say, “I love you,” every time we would fight when we were little. (She wouldn’t let us leave her presence until we did it!) I get it now. Since being in Guatemala, I have developed a deeper appreciation for my own family than I have ever had before. It’s about time that I got some of my priorities straightened out…

In Guatemala, families can be big. My experience is mainly with the rural population in which it is not uncommon for a girl to get pregnant while she is still in her teens, or even pre-teens. Since there is a huge focus on family and less on education and/or careers, the girls are raised in their homes to learn how to care for a family. Most of the women in these villages consider their occupation “ama de casa” which means homemaker. And trust me, what the role of homemaker entails is not as easy as it sounds. Cooking on open fires that need to be kept up, washing each dish and every bit of laundry by hand on a cement washboard, and attempting to keep everything (and every kid) in the house clean where dust, dirt, and mud are the strongest forces invading any house that is open to the outside air can be exhausting tasks. If a woman in a household happens to have a job, she will usually use a fraction of her income to hire a helper to assist in the upkeep of the home for several hours each day.

The way marriages work out here is also worth mentioning. Couples who live together or have children together may refer to themselves as “esposos,” or spouses, which means that their marriage is official and there are documents and responsibilities that come along with it. Also, upon marriage, the woman does not take the last name of her husband. Many Guatemalans use two last names: the primary one the father’s first last name, and the second one is the mother’s first last name. The names one has at birth stay the same for life.

The next, most common form of partnership is referred to as “unidos,” which means “united;” it is not official, but at least some sort of commitment is recognized. In some instances, couples have to pay to get married (to have the appropriate forms and documentation) which could be a reason that many rural-living, poor couples do not take that step. In some cases, men will refer to their partner as “mujer,” basically claiming her as his “woman,” whether he is married to her or not. (It is not usually used in a derogatory manner.) It is also not unheard of for men to have more than one family, especially when they are not “tied down,” per se, to one woman by marriage. (In fact, the practice of men having more than one partner seems to be acceptable throughout the culture.) In contrast, once a woman pops out a baby, she is kind of stuck for life.

Birth control is not widely practiced in the rural areas (although various methods are available from the health center). Unfortunately, many women do not have much of a say in family planning. One roadblock to using birth control in rural households is that some men believe that if a woman is trying to encourage birth control, it is because she is being unfaithful. For instances like these, we could promote natural family planning for which many resources are also available, but those methods takes extreme discipline, love for one another, and most likely habit change. It is a lot of work, and behavior change does NOT come easily in a place where the people are so accustomed to what has always seemed to work for them. Pregnant women and babies are such a common part of life here that an announcement of a baby on the way doesn’t seem as special as it might in the United States. I have my own theory about why people start having babies at such a young age in rural areas: it has a lot to do with lack of education, lack of available opportunity to do anything else, the familiarity with such a family-oriented lifestyle, and, most of all, boredom.

There seems to be no requirement for anyone in this country to go to school. In most of the rural villages, the only school is a primaria, which is equivalent to 1^st through 6^th in grade school. For the majority of rural-living students, this is where education stops—if they haven’t dropped out before then. Básico, or middle school (3 years), is the next step, but it costs money for books, supplies, uniforms, etc. and can involve a long walk (up to several hours) from a village thus deterring rural families from pursuing further education. After grade school, most children just help out around the house with their mothers or learn how to keep the fields with their fathers until they start families of their own in the same community or one nearby. It takes money to progress beyond provision of the necessities for survival, including clean water, food on the table, clothing, and shelter. If there is no extra money available to get families out of this cycle, then it will repeat itself. The people who are able to break the cycle usually have some money coming in from a relative who is working in the States or has some other lucrative job.

The case of migrant workers adds a lot to the family dynamic in Guatemalan society besides money. In some families, husbands, fathers, brothers, and cousins may be absent from the home for months to years at a time while they are in another part of Guatemala or even a different country trying to find work. I can only imagine how difficult it is for those left at home with no clue as to what their significant other is doing or when he or she is coming home again, but having to trust that the extra income will come and will be enough to support the family.

Since I worked in restaurant business for a good seven years alongside Latino coworkers (mostly as cooks and bussers), I have seen one side of the coin: the men, with or without papers, who work their butts off to make as much money as possible to send home. Many of them have wives back in their country of citizenship and are proud to talk about their children. I have also, on occasion, seen the scandalous aspects of the migrant worker lifestyle—that which comes with very little accountability. Now I am in Guatemala making house visits and interviewing women whose husbands, parents, or maybe even children are in the States somewhere. It is interesting to see the backside of a coin whose front side I am so familiar with.

In Guatemala, family units exist in close quarters whether it is that most of the siblings or relatives live in the same town, on the same road, or in the same house. It is unreal how everyone seems to be related to everyone else in town through some marriage or other type of genetic link. There is always a primo (cousin) around every corner! The network of family support definitely compensates for the loneliness that could be experienced with the long-term absence of a spouse or other family member. It could also be useful for childcare—I see a lot of families play “musical houses” with the kids. Usually children live in the same home as the parents until they are married and sometimes even after that. In the United States, it is often the case that once a child turns 18, he either can’t wait to have independence from his parents, to move out, and to live on his own or he gets kicked out of the house by the parents!

Families with Latin American roots stay close together. In some instances, I have noticed that women can be very protective of their boys and men and will go out of their way to cater to the needs of their husbands, brothers, and especially sons. Interestingly enough, in a supposed machismo society where men make most of the decisions, when it comes to the household, the matriarch is in charge. (That may very well be true everywhere.) If you are a girlfriend or wife who isn’t keeping your partner happy or who is influencing him in an undesirable way, you better watch out because before you know it, you’re going to be in his mama’s doghouse! And once you’re out, the circle closes. Loyalty runs through the veins.

I am lucky that I have a Guatemalan family here who has treated me as if I were a daughter/sister since the day I stepped foot into their home at the end of April. I am referring to my training town family in Alotenango. Granted, I do not live with them anymore, but whenever I visit them, I feel at home. It is nice to have that. I stopped by during the holiday season to spend some time with them and brought back a pound of See’s chocolates from the States for them to share. Just as my dad always sends Great Aunt Betty a pound of See’s every Christmas, I might have to make it a tradition for my Guatemalan family. They loved discovering what was inside and were even splitting some of the candies 4-way so everyone present could get a taste!  I am glad I had the opportunity to share some Christmas tradition with my Guatemalan family here, but really, there is no place like home for the holidays.

I took two weeks of vacation time to fly home to spend the holiday season with my family. Eight months is the longest amount of time that I have ever been away from family, and I know we all felt it. I couldn’t get enough physical contact and time spent with them! I thought I would want to go to nice restaurants and eat a whole bunch of American food while I was home, but all I really wanted was to be with the people I love and talk to them. I hardly slept because I didn’t want to miss a single second; I wanted to be overloaded with love and company so I would be sort of recharged when I came back to Guatemala. The majority of my time home was family, family, and more family, but I was able to get in a handful of friend visits as well. Unfortunately, I couldn’t see everyone, but I did what I could. I had the opportunity to spend time with both my mom and dad’s families as well as two or three other families who have all treated me as if I were one of their own at some point or another.

A Christmas tree (this one is at my mom's house), with sparkling lights and a glowing angel, is an essential part of the Christmas spirit and ambiance in any home.

I love studying people and personality dynamics, and I know that families are the best specimens for that type of observation. Holidays, weddings, and funerals are all notorious for bringing out the best and worst in family members since all three events can be somewhat stressful and extremely emotionally charged. Lucky me. I got to experience Christmas separately with both sides of own family and a wedding with another family! Not to make everyone I saw sound like a bunch of lab rats or anything, but those events did provide a wealth of information for my investigation of family matters. So, thank you…

There is no such thing as a perfect family or even a normal one at that—at least not in the sense that the way a family functions fits into any sort of cookie-cutter world. Families come in all shapes and sizes. We cannot choose whose family we are born into, and we can’t really ever change our family members, even if we don’t like some of them sometimes. We are stuck with what we’ve got! And as much as an older sibling may threaten a younger sibling to put him up for adoption or pack him up in a box and send him on a plane to Timbuktu, there are no trade-ins. Sometimes a person may feel unloved by his family or feel as if he doesn’t belong. That person may pull away, claim to disown his family, or even seek another family to be a part of, but he will never be able to get rid of his own. They are always going to be there. Families are forever.

One of my favorite parts of being home was experiencing the presence of “family dynamic.” While at my mom’s house just before Christmas, we were all coming and going and staying awhile to cook, clean, decorate, or just visit. There are five of us plus Mom, and now that my siblings and I are adults (or inching toward that direction), there are boyfriends, a girlfriend, and my niece and nephew to add to the mix. I noticed how the dynamic in the house constantly changed with the presence or absence of each family member. It is amazing how much each person in a family can enrich, liven up, or depress the mood in the room! I observed this in a couple other families as well and thought it was so interesting how each person slightly adjusts his or her social behavior to accommodate any additions or withdrawals of company in a room or house.

My niece, Riann, and I. She adds a bundle of sweetness to any room she enters!

Families have this unspoken line of communication that can be understood just by looking at each other and reading each other’s eyes or body language. If there is something that is causing worry, stress, or excitement, everyone in the family feels it without even needing to speak about it. On the other hand, someone who is not connected to the family would be clueless as to what exactly is going on! I found myself in awe of one particular family while I was home when they exemplified how connected their family network is. At one point, I had a short conversation with one family member, and a day and half later, when I was in the presence of the rest of the family, I quickly figured out that they all knew about that conversation and practically everything else that was going on regarding the family dynamic and how I fit into it! I wasn’t really expecting that, but how could I be surprised? They are a very close-knit family, after all. Communication among unrelated people will never be as keen as that which a family shares.

In order for any system of communication to be efficient, all functioning parts must have an assigned job or special role to play. In family systems, each member seems to develop his or her own specialty as time goes by. Some roles, such as those destined by the birth order effect, are somewhat predictable. For example (and this is a generalization), oldest children like to be in charge and tell everyone what to do, middle children are always fighting for attention, and the youngest ones are lost in their own little worlds—they may either be the hams of the family or they may slide under the radar and perhaps even go unnoticed as they create their own sorts of mischief. Then there are the providers, the nurturers, the grouches, and the troublemakers, the thinkers, the forgetful ones, the “black sheep,” and the ones who never answer their phones. Every family has ‘em.

Each member creates a little niche for himself, and the others learn to play into that. In fact, we grow accustomed the personalities, strengths, and weaknesses of every relative and begin to depend on the roles they play. In my family, I know who to go to when I need something fixed or when I need a good recipe. I know who to go to when I want to vent my frustrations, elaborate on my big ideas, or when I just want to cry. (And I know who NOT to go to!) I know who is going to call me out for being ridiculous when I make silly decisions, and I know with whom I can have a philosophical conversation. I know which of my siblings I can depend on to help me get things done, and I know who to hang out with when I just want to be quiet and do nothing, but still have company. There are some in the family with photographic memories and others who can never seem to get all the details straight. Some of us can’t tell a joke to save our lives while a couple others can have the entire room cracking up from the moment they walk in the door until an hour after they leave! The point is that every family has its own collection of characters, and no matter how good, bad, or confused any family member is at a particular time, he or she will always have a role that contributes to the family dynamic.

My grandma and little sister, Lyndsie, have filled the piano-playing niche in the family. Here they are playing together on Christmas.

My cousin, Will, and sisters, Christie and Lyndsie. Like I said, ever family has its characters. Must I say more?

Spending Christmas day at my dad’s house was wonderful! There were about 18 of us, including siblings, parents, cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents. It was fun having my cousins and siblings together—the youngest of whom are just making it out of the awkward teenager phase. Of my 9 cousins, 8 are boys, and I got to visit with 5 of them at Christmas. I couldn’t believe what intelligent, handsome men they are becoming (my 2 brothers included), each with his unique personality and a lot to say. I enjoyed listening to them and watching them interact with the rest of the family. Each of these young men contributed so much to the positive atmosphere; it is nice to see how comfortable they have each become in their own skins. Having a house full of love and happiness at Christmastime is one of the best things ever!

Here I am surrounded by my brother, Zack (to the left of me), and my cousins, Robert and Christian (who is in the process of making a goofy face) on Christmas.

When I think about my family and try to imagine how life would be if one of them weren’t around anymore, I can’t really do it. I know we can’t control the way life happens all the time and that sometimes God’s plans for us are different from what we think they should be, but the thought of losing a family member is one place I don’t like to go. Last week, we had a little scare when my brother, Jeffrey, became dangerously ill and ended up in the hospital, where he spent his 19^th birthday getting pumped with antibiotics and IVs. The doctors even performed a spinal tap on him to test for meningitis. No one is really sure what the illness was, but after two days, he was released and he is back to normal now. He was scared for his life. (I would be, too, if the docs were throwing out mortality rates to a list if illnesses I might possibly have like they were with him!) We were all worried. The idea that our almost 6’4”, strong, healthy brother could get knocked off his feet like that was unthinkable. I couldn’t be with him since I am here, but the thought of him suffering made me feel so sad and helpless. All I could do was pray and send some guardian angels his way. Thank God he is all right.

I am so grateful for my brothers and sisters. A person’s family is a part of who that person is and will be for the rest of his life, but siblings are like memory banks: if you get lost or forget something or lose track of who you are, just turn to them—they will always help you find yourself or recall a detail from a childhood story that just isn’t coming to you. Your siblings know you better than anyone in the world. You grow up [usually] in the same house together, so your siblings know your biggest fears and your deepest, darkest secrets—whether you told them or they read about them in the diary they found in your room! I wouldn’t trade in any of my siblings, not even for a million dollars—they know too much. If I am blessed with a family and children of my own someday, I hope I can pop out enough babies for my kids to experience what is it like to have siblings. It makes growing up so much fun and looking back as an adult at the silly things you used to do together very entertaining!

In our home, the best time spent with siblings and parents is usually at family dinner (this one is at my dad’s house). Besides great food, it always includes loads of laughter!

It is difficult to be so far away from my siblings, but I honestly believe that this experience is drawing us all closer than we have been. I want to make a special note about my sisters (I have four of them), who have given me a special kind of strength that I think can only come from sisters. Their words of encouragement and their laughter have moved mountains, and just thinking about what beautiful people they are makes me smile. My sister, Lyndsie, got me a 2012 sister-quote calendar for Christmas, and one of my favorite quotes so far is the following: “There’s a special kind of freedom sisters enjoy. Freedom to share innermost thoughts, to ask a favor, to show their true feelings. The freedom to simply be themselves.”—Anonymous. In Baz Luhrmann’s song from 1999, “Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen),” he dispenses the following piece of advice: “Be nice to your siblings; they’re your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick to you in the future.” I think he makes a good point.

People say that we always hurt the ones who are closest to us, and often those people are our family members. I think deep down we believe that the people who care about us, especially family members, will love us unconditionally so in a sense we know we can get away with treating them poorly or taking out all of our anger or frustrations on them. We know they will not abandon us. They couldn’t if they tried! They are stuck with us, remember? Sometimes a loved one who has been mistreated will walk away and spend some time at a distance, but when you know that all that person has ever done is loved you, cared about you, and respected you and no matter what happens, he or she always will, there is a sense of security in knowing that he or she will come back around at some point or another and that the absence is not permanent. (That is true for family, at least.) But whether it is a family member or someone you love who may be close like family, and no matter how strong or resilient that person seems—leaving one under the impression that he or she can handle just about anything, it is important to keep in mind that that person is human and thus has limits and feelings; sometimes those limits can be exceeded and those feelings hurt. So, even though it is so easy to do, be careful not to take the people who love you for granted too often; if they really matter to you, show them that every once in a while.

The cool part about families is that they can include whomever they feel like it whenever they want; families are very adaptable and always changing. Whether it is someone passing on, a new baby born, or a marriage that has taken place, with each event comes the opportunity for a family to reshape itself and create a niche for each member. When we were growing up, my mom opened her home to our friends to join us for holidays and meals, always treating them as if they were a part of the family. We used to joke around with her about “taking in all the strays” for the holidays. (She still does that.) It made me realize that there are many instances in life when people grow to care about their friends enough to include them at their table or refer to them as a brother, sister, etc. Families can consist of 2, 47, or 150 people, blood-related, extended, or friend-inclusive; there may be marriage, separation or divorce, stepparents and half-siblings, but no matter how you look at it and no matter how it changes, it will always stand as one of the most special and dependable support systems in a person’s life.

The night I flew in from Guatemala, we all went out to delicious dinner at a nice Italian restaurant in San Francisco (Dad’s treat!). I was together with BOTH families including my mom, dad, step mom and all but one sibling. We also included my brother’s friend in our family dinner!

On that note, I should talk about marriage a little bit because when people say, “I do” to the person they have chosen to be their life partner, they are saying, “I do” to their partner’s whole fam-damily as well! It’s always a package deal with a family bonus. Isn’t that nice? Lol. Well, while I was home, I attended the wedding of two of my close friends from college, Russell and Maricela, and what a grand affair it was! They included every family member possible as well as a handful of friends for participation in the wedding, whether it was having a part in the Mass, being part of the wedding party, or gliding across the floor during the special ballroom dance performances at the reception. I was happy to share in the joy and festivities of their special day but, more importantly, to be a part of the congregation supporting them and witnessing the commitment they made to each other and to God in the Sacrament of Marriage. To join in union with another person and become one before God, committing to spend the rest of your lives together and devoting yourselves entirely to the possibility of raising a family together is kind of a big deal. I believe that in order to take that step toward marriage, thus agreeing to work toward a functional, healthy partnership, putting the needs of someone else ahead of one’s own, and being ready to welcome new life into the world and love it, one has to be rather selfless. I admire all those who act on their commitment to marriage.

Russell & Maricela, saying their vows, at St. Mary’s Basilica in Phoenix, AZ.

As I have watched many of my friends and some family members take steps toward marriage (and raising families of their own) and observed other married couples in families with whom I like to spend time, my perspective has changed regarding what marriage entails. When I was little, I would see a wedding and get the idea in my head that it is a magical event and that couples who find “the one” and get hitched will live on Cloud 9 and be happy every single day for the rest of their lives! Maybe we have all (especially the ladies) fantasized about something like that at one point or another? Well, I see now that married couples don’t exactly get transported to a whole new world, and it is not just butterflies and roses all the time. While I could argue that couples do enter another realm (the realm of two acting as one) upon saying their vows, I have now accepted how real that action is.

The bride and groom, making their rounds at the wedding reception. Married or not, they are always going to be the same “Mari” and “Russell” I have known for years.

Neither person is going to change who they are so one either has to accept his or her partner as is before the wedding or forget it! Weddings don’t change people. Life is made up of a bunch of small, day-to-day moments. There will always be hardship, just as there will be overwhelming bliss—and we can’t pick and choose what days those occurrences will happen for us. The adventure of facing every brand new day comes with being willing to adapt to the ever-changing circumstances that life throws at us. The possibility of trusting that one will always have a companion with whom to share those joyous moments, work through the messy situations, and create a fulfilling life—together—is something that I believe we all look forward to or can appreciate if that companionship already exists in our lives. Marriage is hardly different from any other day except for the HUGE commitment (discussed above) to move forward and face the unknown together with a person whom you trust, respect, know, admire, and really really love. But, being that I have not been engaged in a steady relationship for more than a handful of months, I might not know what I am talking about. It’s just a theory so take it with a grain of salt.

At the wedding, I had the opportunity to spend some time with Patrick, another good friend from college. Patrick and I have rights to claim that “we were there at the beginning” of Mari and Russell. We all met each other for the first time during a January Term trip to Ecuador in 2007 while attending St. Mary’s College.

A couple cultural observations jumped out at me while I was in the United States. First of all, there is so much food! Of course, it was Christmastime, but I was overwhelmed with snacks and sweets, full refrigerators and feasts. All I saw were options, excess, a consumer society, and wastefulness. (Good thing the USA has a reliable system for trash management.) When I was in Walnut Creek with my friend Elease on a weekday after New Years, I was taken aback when we walked by the Apple store and saw the place buzzing as if it were Christmas Eve. There were at least 30 customers inside—at 2 PM on a Tuesday afternoon! I never would have given it a second thought a year ago, but now, it seems so strange: this society driven by the desire to buy more stuff and acquire things—not to mention the obsession with the virtual world.

I noticed how much Americans depend on their cell phones for practically all information acquisition whether it be checking their e-mail, using the GPS, taking a quick look at Facebook, comparing prices for online shopping, sharing pictures, or texting everyone and their grandmother. Now, don’t get me wrong, I think the technology we have today is way cool, and I appreciate how it has allowed me to maintain steady communication with y’all, but where do we draw the line? There is such a rich quality in face-to-face interaction. Humans are social beings that require contact and thrive on the physical presence of other people. I just hope that our society doesn’t “naturally select” against the ability to non-virtually socialize…

Everything is so convenient in the States. I really enjoyed that aspect of being home. I especially liked the carpet in houses, insulation, and controlled heating, as well as hot showers with water pressure. And I washed some clothes in a washing machine and dried them in a dryer! Yippee!!! It felt so nice to drive my own car and use a trunk instead of having to worry about where I was going to fit two backpacks, a bag of groceries, and myself on a chicken bus. The stoplights, highways, and marked lanes create such excellent organization while driving in the States. In addition, I got to spend a couple nights in cushy beds with big, fluffy pillows and thick comforters. I felt like I was sleeping in the clouds! Instead of having to barter my way through the market and pick through vegetables until I found something that I could possibly make into a meal, I conquered Safeway in just a few minutes and spoke to only one other person besides the cashier. It was all so easy. But it was also kind of bland.

I will surely miss the convenience, but coming back to Guatemala after a two-week practically sleepless vacation felt very natural. The constant challenge of having to maneuver through any unpredictable situation at hand can give a person a sense of being alive. It reminds you that you are not a robot, but an adaptable, thinking human being. Even speaking Spanish again was exciting for me. I still don’t understand some of the stuff people say to me, and I have to push myself to figure it out.

Two very important things I learned from my trip home are the following: 1) Sixty-pound rolling luggage may be convenient for nice hotels and paved roads in the USA, but it doesn’t mix well with rural Guatemala; my suitcase will be lucky to see the light of the United States ever again. 2) Just because I’m having an adventure of a lifetime over here in Guatemala doesn’t mean that I should be the center of everyone’s worlds. People have their own lives and their own exciting things going on. I was very pleased to find myself in a stable and healthy enough position (for the most part) while I was home to be able to give support to the people I really care about, to lend an ear, and to really connect with them.

My mom and I were able to spend some quality momma/daughter time while I was home.

I can tell I have changed and grown immensely. Going home reassured me that I am not missing out on too much because pretty much everything was just how I had left it. I was both relieved and freaked out by that. It was so easy to just pick up right where I had left off, as if I had never been gone. I visited some of the places I used to go and saw some of the people I used to see, but something felt off. It scared me how easily I could fall back into my old patterns and lifestyle habits; I was running around like crazy with a loaded schedule and practically no time for sleep. It made me think that I haven’t been away for long enough to keep a tight grasp on the new healthy habits I have been forming in the last several months. I feel like I need more time away. I am okay with how my trip home went because I knew I needed to make the most of the two short weeks I had. It was a whirlwind of events to take in, and I finished up my visit both physically and emotionally drained, but it was well worth it considering that I might not make it home again before the end of my service.

As I sat on the bus that travels the dirt road back to San Andrés, the dust floated in through the windows and left a nice layer on everything it touched; all I could think was how happy I was that my nice clothes are all safe in a closet at home. I said to myself, “Well, here we go again.” Sadly, upon returning to my house in San Andrés, I learned that my favorite kitten, Bella (the one I was socializing), was given away against my prior request. This was quite a disappointment to me since I had brought back flea medicine, cat toys, and ping-pong balls for her to play with from the States, but I guess I’ll take it as another lesson in the dangers of becoming attached to anything in this country. Coincidentally, she was given to another family member.

They say that living in Northern California can make a person “soft.” Well, I was born and raised in Nor Cal and thus must qualify for the “soft” category. But let me tell you, living in Guatemala—being away from my entire family, having to fend for myself, being taken advantage of simply for the color of my skin, and not really knowing who I can trust—is sure as heck hardening me. Sometimes I think I can trust someone or I start to believe that certain people are looking out for me, but the next thing I know, I’m left in the dust. Dealing with people and situations out here as an outsider is good practice for both recognizing my intuition and learning to toughen up. If I don’t finish my service completely hardened, at least I might be able to consider myself “sharpened.”

When I returned to site, I did pretty much nothing (except sleep!) for about a week and a half, just trying to process everything that had happened during my trip home. It was a lot. I went through some serious family withdrawals, but I managed all right with a couple lengthy phone calls to both my mom and step mom. I am excited to jump back into work again, but January was ridiculously slow since there are so many political changes going on right now. Two of our counterparts are gone for sure, and the other two still don’t know if they have a job for this year yet. We are pretty sure Rosa is going to stick around, but right now she can’t go out to our aldeas with us because she is the only one in the health center to weigh babies and hold the fort down. Perry and I sat down and made a rough schedule and timeline for the year so we could visualize our direction and start working on projects. Finally, we decided to continue our house visits in Pajquiej without Rosa (we can get away without a translator in that village). I am hoping things will pick up and I can get some structure going, but I am in Guatemala, so you never really know what’s going to happen!

I turned 25 two Saturdays ago (the 21^st) and spent the weekend with a couple of my PCV friends. My friend Kathy and I did some awesome last minute planning and decided to head to Xela for the weekend. We rounded up a couple other friends to join us for our adventures. Friday night we all went out to dinner at a burger joint in the city (Xela is industrialized and urban with lots to do). Then we headed to bed early so we could all rest up for the big Saturday event: hiking up a volcano. Volcano Santa María lies about 20 minutes outside of Xela and reaches 3,772 meters (~12,400 feet). As a perfect cone, it is the steepest and most technical climb of all the volcanoes in Guatemala. Although it has been dormant since its last major eruption in 1902 (which was extremely destructive!), it overlooks the most active volcano in Guatemala (which goes off about once an hour) on its western side.

Just before the hike, the four girls, Chelsea, Kathy, Lucy, and I, posed with Volcano Santa Maria in the background.

From the top of Volcano Santa Maria, this is what we could see of the erupting volcano through the clouds below. (The ash and smoke has a brownish tint to it compared to the clouds surrounding it.)

We had lots of fun taking pictures at the top—this was right before we attempted the human pyramid. Top row: Kathy, Chelsea, Lucy. Middle: me! Bottom: Nic, Justin, Thomas.

Our group of 8 set out in the morning with packed lunches and made it to the top after a little over 3 hours. We weren’t sure what we would find at the top and were a little astonished to stumble upon several groups performing Maya rituals. Apparently, they have monthly ceremonies on the volcano to ask for blessings from above. One of the rituals we witnessed involved cutting off live chickens’ heads, draining the blood into the ritual fire, and then manually ripping the chicken in half before throwing the rest of its body parts onto the fire. In addition to that surprise, while we were goofing off and taking fun pictures together, the entire volcano started shaking and didn’t stop for about 30 seconds! There was an earthquake in southern Mexico with a magnitude of 6.1 on the Richter scale, and we all got to experience it from the top of a volcano—and then we watched the other volcano spew ash up through the clouds high into the air. Happy birthday to me!!!

Group pic at the top with the clouds merging into the landscape of Xela (to the right). This is where we were when the earthquake happened.

Headless chicken over the ritual fire at the Maya ceremony.

The girls, Kathy, Lucy, Chelsea, and I, jumping over the clouds!

The guys, Thomas, Frank, Justin, and Nic, posing on a big rock.

When we got back to Xela, we freshened up before heading out for well-earned pizza and beer. We spent the rest of the night on the town dancing and socializing with other PCVs. There were a bunch of us in Xela that weekend because there were two other PC birthdays being celebrated! It was a fun night, and Kathy and I rolled in to our hostel at around 3:30 in the morning. We were back up at 7:30 for our Sunday morning plans. The four of us girls who hiked the volcano, Kathy, Chelsea, Lucy, and I, decided to get massages at a hotel/spa that was built on geothermal vents. I had a bamboo massage that provided some deep tissue work and felt amazing! Our only complaint was that our calves and quads were so sore from the hike that it really hurt to get those parts worked on. Another fantastic weekend with good food, great company, fun adventures, and girl time!

Chels, me, and Kathy the night before our big hike.

The four of us girls goofing off and displaying how strong we think we are. We had so much fun together that day!

I like 25. I told my mom, “I am woman now!” And I meant it. I feel like a woman. And I like it. I have a really good feeling about this year. This past year was a relatively difficult one with a lot of instability, changes, frustration, and transitional growth, but I think that was all meant to prepare me for what is to come this year. I am ready to handle whatever the Land of Eternal Unpredictability has to throw my way, and it has already started dishing out the unknown…

Here I am at the very top of the volcano!

Peace Corps Guatemala is undergoing some HUGE changes right now. Most of the measures being taken are geared toward the safety and security of volunteers here. What happens in other PC countries in Central America directly affects PC Guatemala, and that is what is going on. (Honduras started it all.) The changes taking place may affect the duration of my service in Guatemala. I was planning on mentioning some of the changes in this post, but too much has developed and probably needs to be explained more thoroughly than in just a paragraph or two. I already have half of that chapter written so I will finish it up and hopefully post it within a week or so.

Love,

Alexandra

EXTRA! EXTRA!

Congratulations to my oldest sister, Ariana, who announced that she is pregnant with her third baby! I’m going to be an auntie again!!! Woo-hoo!

Congratulations to my little sister, Lyndsie, who was Homecoming Queen at her school this year! I know that was a special night for you.

Congratulations to Elease & Miguel on your upcoming marriage—next weekend! (I’ll be with you in spirit!!)

Happy Birthday to all my January family members (there are lots of us): my cousins Sheldon and Nathan (who have the same birth date as I do), my brother Jeffrey, and my grandma Carole! Also, happy birthday to my niece, Riann—the only February baby!

Before I jump into the fun, I will do a wrap-up of November. I was out of my site for most of the month, starting with the day I left for Xela (pronounced “SHAY-luh,” it is the second-largest city in this country, just behind the capital, Guatemala City) to run in the half-marathon. And I did it! I participated in my very first half-marathon and ran the whole thing! At an altitude of 7,000 feet, I was definitely hurting (and the uphill parts were difficult!), but I ran the last 3 kilometers (out of 21) on pure adrenaline and sprinted across the finish line after 2 hours and 16 minutes. I’m estimating that at least 85% of the 2,285 half-marathon participants were male—running alongside a whole nine of us PCVs. The entire event was extremely organized and went smoothly. I was very happy to be a part of it. Also, I have to say, it is a pretty cool feeling when you successfully complete something that you didn’t know you could do or that you may have been intimidated by in the past.

From Xela, I went directly to Santa Lucia Milpas Altas, where the Peace Corps Office is located for a week of “Reconnect.” Our training group of HH and YD volunteers who started in April reunited to share with each other our progress in our sites, ideas for projects and starting health promoter groups, and examples of approaches that have or haven’t worked. Our trainers and second-year PCVs also introduced to us a variety of documents, forms, and diagnostic tools that we will be implementing into our work in our communities. Those two days were followed by three days of language training (either Spanish or a Maya language) as well as break-out sessions with 2^nd-year PCVs to receive training on small scale projects such as nutrition workshops and tire gardens, bottle projects, and a how-to approach for working with midwives. It was definitely a full week, but it was really nice to catch up with a lot of old friends and to see how everyone has changed and adapted to their sites and their work. The trend with the guys is that many of them have dropped a noticeable amount of weight since first arriving in country, and in the ladies’ department, a good handful have found for themselves Guatemalan boyfriends!

A very sad part of the week was that on the first day of Reconnect, Pedro decided to ET. He had been considering an early termination for a while and finally made the decision. He is a Registered Nurse and worked in a hospital before he joined PC, and the kind of work PC has us doing is not as busy or hands-on as Pedro is used to and likes to do. So he headed back to his hometown, Bend, Oregon, at the end of that week —(shout out to Sean! Bend DOES exist!). But, fear not! He was only home for a couple weeks and just returned to Guatemala about a week ago. He may get a job as a nurse at one of the hospitals out here for a while, (he established a pretty extensive network of Guatemalan friends/contacts in the time he was here already so I think he shouldn’t have any trouble getting in), but he is also refocused and eager to pursue further education back in the States. Although I believe that Pedro made the right decision for himself, it is always hard to see one of our own leave. He and I pep-talked each other through training and ran that darn hill time after time together in Alotenango. He was like a brother to so many of us and a support system that I thought I could always count on so it was a huge wake-up call when he left. I didn’t realize I would take it hard, but it came at a time when I was discovering that other support systems I have been depending on aren’t as real or steady as I thought. I knew very well before joining that Peace Corps offers an individual experience, a personal journey of sorts, and I thought I was ready to tackle it head-on, all by myself. In reality though, I have been subconsciously fighting being alone since the beginning. What can I say? I’m a social being! It’s not just me, though; I notice similar patterns and behaviors in other PCVs who are compensating for being away from their families and loved ones as well. (We are all grateful for the endless love and encouragement we get from home, but you guys are really far away, and sometimes we crave something a little closer in proximity.) With that enlightenment, the stark realization hit me that I had been counting on several people whose support I was only pretending to believe was present but didn’t actually exist. It’s a funny life out here, and our minds can surely play some tricks on us! I’ve heard that some Peace Corps people really do go crazy… Lol! Well, I have since discovered healthy, productive ways to fill my time, and now that I surrendered the faux-comforts I was hanging on to, I am actually getting pretty comfortable standing on my own two feet. Once I looked around me and started reaching out, I found that I was surrounded by some very special people right in front of my face, and I am learning to appreciate what I already have instead of trying to force something that will never materialize.

Pedro and I in Panajachel. His great personality will be missed.

Shortly after Reconnect, Thanksgiving vacation started. (Normally, we do not get days off for an American holiday unless it is also celebrated in Guatemala, but our PC “supervisors” were kind enough to make an exception for Thanksgiving.) Of course many of us PCVs wanted to take advantage of the string of free days in a row, so a good majority of PCVs planned long-distance trips. I was part of a group that headed to the eastern part of Guatemala, where the treasures of the rainforest and Caribbean coast are located, awaiting curious explorers. Our group consisted of 11 PCV ladies and one Guatemalan boyfriend (who was quite the trooper for being surrounded by all women for almost three days), and we started our journey at a little lodge tucked away in the jungle just up the mouth of the Rio Dulce, the river that flows to the Honduras Bay/Caribbean Sea. Of course, the jungle experience wouldn’t be complete without mosquito net-covered beds in our bungalows and tarantulas roaming the premises. On Thanksgiving morning, six of us ladies went out to the dock on the river to do some morning yoga, and while I was leading our little group with the sun salute (a yoga routine), two camouflage army boats filled with army men passed by our dock, traveling up the river. Since they were sporting the American flag, we thought it would only be appropriate to greet them with big smiles, waves, and a Happy Thanksgiving! I think they were pretty excited to be greeted by such lively women, and I probably wouldn’t be far from the truth if I said that on their way back down the river, some of them were probably wishing they could get off their boat and join us in our yoga practice! It was a really fun couple of moments for the six of us, too, and it made us proud to be healthy, American Peace Corps women serving in Guatemala on Thanksgiving morning. (We decided that we were all very grateful to have two boats full of smiling army men pass by us to kick off the day!)

Dusk on the Rio Dulce

The dock on the river at the Hotelito Perdido (our yoga spot)!

Kathy and Anna kayaking on the Rio Lampara

After breakfast, we all tackled our planned activities for the day. My plan involved three other ladies, Kathy, Ale, and Anna, and we decided to take the kayaks out for the day. This was a pivotal move during vacation because it was the beginning of our “fierce adventuring foursome”—the four of us ended up spending most of our time together on random expeditions throughout the entire weekend. And what a great group of girls to be surrounded by! I’ve known Kathy since the very beginning, but I had hardly spent any time with the other two girls, and I feel lucky to have had the opportunity to get to know such positive, happy, and fun ladies. So we headed out on our kayaks in search of the Lampara Waterfalls, not really knowing the exact direction or how long it was supposed to take, but we were up for exploring the jungle along the river and we even ventured deeper into the rainforest via tributaries. After about 2 hours of rowing, we finally got to the end of the Lampara River, parked our kayaks, and began hiking through the jungle on a hunt for our destination. We were all in sandals and the jungle was so muddy that we ended up trudging along the rainforest floor barefoot. (We made sure to check our feet for hookworms on our way out!) Anna was like a fearless Amazon warrior woman as she led us through the thick foliage of a relatively unmarked trail to the waterfalls. Once we got there, we unpacked our picnic lunch on a big rock and chowed down, and then we swam and played on the waterfalls and in the fresh pools for a little while before heading back. We returned to the lodge just before dusk—6 hours after our departure—to the rest of our group waiting on the dock for us, cheering us on. (We’d been gone so long, they were thinking about sending a search party for us! Lol!) Exhausted and thoroughly satisfied with our day, we wandered into the dining area where a non-Turkey Thanksgiving dinner was served family-style. We had a traditional seafood dish of that area called tapado; it is a mix of seafood (fish, crab, shrimp, etc.) cooked in coconut milk with a curry flavoring—only ours came just with a big fish, eyes, tail, bones, and everything! We had salad, rice, fried eggplant, and coconut bread for our side dishes, and just before dinner, we went all around the table so each person had the opportunity to say a couple things she was grateful for. It really was a fantastic day and an unforgettable jungle Thanksgiving!

Barefoot hike in the jungle in search of the waterfalls!

Kathy, Anna, and Ale enjoying our picnic lunch on the rock.

Kathy, Anna, and Ale playing in the pools by the Lampara waterfalls.

Me on the waterfall!

On Friday morning, we all hopped in a boat that took us down the river to the coast of the Honduras Bay/Caribbean Sea, where the town of Lívingston is located. Accessible only by boat and surrounded by thick rainforest, Lívingston is a Guatemalan city with a culture that is unique to any other in Guatemala. There is a handful of Hindu people and typical Maya/ladino Guatemalans, but the majority of the population is made up of Garífuna, the black Guatemalans who have the genetic influence of the Caribbean. The atmosphere as well as the music of Lívingston is also consistent with that laidback “Caribbean” feel. National Garífuna Day happens to be on (or around) November 25^th, which is why so many of us decided to spend our holiday weekend in Lívingston—so we could experience the cultural festivities. (My rough estimate of PCVs that I encountered in Lívingston or that I knew were there was between 40 and 50.) Once we got settled, we headed straight to the beach! This particular beach was pretty much claimed by PCVs for the weekend. The water was warm and shallow for a long way out, and we could easily see Belize in the distance. We spent two days in a row at this beach wading in the water and chatting, playing Frisbee, reading, playing volleyball, and sun-bathing. (I know better than to try to tan, so I passed my time at the beach attempting to remain the whitest person out of everyone there! That wasn’t too hard…) There were a lot of PCVs around who I had not met before, both guys and gals, and it was really nice meeting and getting to know a lot more of the PC “family” in such a relaxed environment. There are some really neat people out here! There are also a couple crazies, but that’s to be expected… Although by this point we were mingling with PC guys as well, the four of us ladies still considered “girl time” the top priority of the weekend. It was much needed, I think, by all of us, and each other’s company was totally appreciated.

A small sample of PC ladies enjoying ourselves at the beach.

To be fair, a representation of PC men...a little bit of their personalites unveiled!

One afternoon, my adventure crew hiked out from our “claimed” beach to a well-known attraction in Lívingston called Siete Altares (the Seven Altars). After a nice walk along the shore, the path cuts into the rainforest and leads to a series of small, freshwater cascades that pass through the vegetation on their way out to the sea. Not only was it beautiful, but it was also extremely peaceful listening to the streams trickle as they passed like velvet over the smooth rocks. On Friday, a huge group of us went out dancing till all hours of the night, and on Saturday, my adventuring foursome went off again to treat ourselves to some fine Italian dining at a restaurant that I had read about in my Insight Guide. Second only to girl time and our spontaneous escapades, playing volleyball on the beach was definitely a highlight of my trip—it felt so good to get my hands on one again! I had a couple other eager “volleyball people” around me to play with, and we played until our forearms were so bruised that it hurt and we couldn’t play anymore. By the end of the weekend, nearly every muscle in my body was sore and I was randomly marked with bruises—half of which had unknown origin, but it was all worth it! This was the first extended vacation I have taken since arriving in Guatemala. It was also my first visit to the Caribbean, let alone a beach on an east coast, so I got to see the sun rise up from an ocean horizon for the first time, and it was just gorgeous! All in all, it was practically perfect in every way, and I am delighted not only that I had the opportunity to travel to such a beautiful place, but also that I got to share my experiences with some really cool people.

Sunrise in Lívingston

Now, back to a day in the life of Peace Corps living… Let me start with the toilet paper situation. It’s a pretty funny thing here. Unlike in the United States where it is just assumed that every bathroom will have TP and you can flush it down the tiolet, here there is almost never any toilet paper in the restrooms and all TP goes into a trashcan because it cannot be flushed (or else it would probably clog the pipes). Oh, and good luck finding a restroom to use at that! Most people who live out in the rural villages do not even have a specified place to relieve themselves at their own homes. Some people make their business off of running a public restroom where not only is there an entrance fee to pay, but the toilet paper comes at a cost as well! It can be very irritating how stingy people are about TP here, but everything costs money and people who do not have money at their constant disposal have different priorities in life. This TP attitude I believe has led to many people having become accustomed to just not using toilet paper at all, but for those people who do like to be clean and dry, it’s best to get in the habit of carrying their own TP or tissues around. (Kellie, thanks for sending a stockpile of pocket tissues my way—they come in handy!) From my observation, most of the time only women are paying to use the public bathrooms because men can (and DO) pee anywhere and everywhere. They just unzip and go wherever they please: on the side of the road, on a tire of a chicken bus, next to a tree, on the wall of a building, basically any place they can stand. It is so customary out here to see a guy standing with his feet hip-distance apart and his back maybe  half-turned that one might start feeling out of place if there weren’t at least one guy peeing somewhere in a 360-degree glance around. It reminds me of the way male dogs go around marking everything in site. I feel like it is an extremely unbalanced system though because women don’t have that same freedom. Women do resort to the bushes if they REALLY can’t hold it, but it seems to be more taboo than when the men go right in front of everyone and their mothers. Even in the schools, there are sometimes bathrooms, but they haven’t functioned for years. There is no running water. There are spiders and dust and dirt collecting on the toilets, but no worries, the boys and men can go use the bushes if nature calls. It astonishes me that such a basic human function and right to use a bathroom is not accommodated for with consideration of the masses in mind, but one, I am “American” so maybe I expect too much, and two, I am female, so why should I expect men to take into account the bathroom situation if they do not deem it a problem? I’m not so sure how I can single-handedly resolve the issue here, so in the meantime while I’m scheming, I’ll just make sure to have TP in my back pocket at all times…

To add on to all the funny behaviors and odd habits, I have a nice collection to slightly elaborate on. First of all, people walk around with their zippers down or gaping open on the pants ALL the TIME. At first, I wanted to tell people, but then I saw so many flies open that I realized people just don’t care. I don’t know whether it is that they forget to zip up or that their zippers just aren’t functional, but they don’t seemed to be worried about their horses getting out so I don’t even bother informing them that they had better close the barn door… Men also have this belly-rubbing thing they do. They like to pull their shirts up halfway, exposing their gut and occasionally giving it a rub or a pat. Normally this happens when they are just “hanging out” so belly-rubbing is a sort of past-time for them. We were told during training that there is sometimes a special meaning behind belly-rubbing—that it can be a signal from a man letting a woman know that he is interested in her, but I just like to assume they expose their bellies to get a little air or to show they’re “relaxing.” In regards to the women here, (and keep in mind that most of these behaviors are prevalent in the rural parts of the country, not so much in the bigger cities), they seem to not mind exposing themselves either—only with them it is chest exposure. In the middle of the market, at the schools while waiting to get their children weighed, on the busses and micros, if there is a woman with a child whom she still breastfeeds and the kid gets hungry, up comes her shirt within a few seconds. I have never seen so many bare bosoms hanging around so freely. But looking back on everything previously mentioned (bathroom situation, zippers, and boobs), it should be clear that there is very little consideration for privacy in this culture. Shame doesn’t really exist here either. No rules, no boundaries, no privacy, no shame.

Perry, Rolin, and (Perry's friend) Jelmer displaying how the belly-rub is done.

The clothing situation is worth mentioning in this chapter as well. Most indigenous women wear the traditional Maya clothing, called traje típico (pronounced “TRAH-hay TI-pee-coh”). It consists of a thick woven piece of fabric used as a skirt called corte, which is held up by an intricately embroidered belt that is wrapped tightly around the waist. The blouse, called a huipil, can consist of any combination of lace, embroidery, beading, sequins, and uniquely sewn patterns. A cool thing about traje típico is that each region of Guatemala has its own variation, whether it is the woven pattern or number of colors used in the corte, the length or thickness of the corte, or the style, cut, and design of the huipiles. Some regions even use hats or fancy hair wrap decorations. (I have seen a lot of hair wrap accessories in the older women more so than younger women.) After traveling a lot around different parts of Guatemala, I have started to recognize the traje of certain regions. In the high altitude regions, the traje tends to be thick, long, and warm; in the northern Quiché town of Nebaj, the traje has mostly red tones with knee-length red and white-striped corte. The traje of my town, San Andrés, seems to be rather scandalous compared to other regions because the huipiles that the women wear are midriffs with lacy backs! This makes sense when the temperature of San Andrés is considered: it is always so warm here that ventilation in clothing is necessary. There is men’s traje típico as well, however, a very small percentage of indigenous men actually wear it. It consists of white woven pants that fit loosely and are held up with a red sash/belt and usually a button-up long sleeve shirt. Actually, the most common type of shirt I have seen on men wearing traje is the classic men’s western-themed button-up collared shirt—the one that is a solid bold color but has a strip of images of cowboys riding their horses with lassos waving in the air across chest and upper back of the shirt. It makes me laugh every time. Some accessories that may be included in the menswear are a hat, a machete, or a “manbag” that goes across the chest and rests at the man’s side or behind his back. The majority of men in Guatemala, whether indigenous or ladino (European blood), wear jeans and t-shirts or button-down collared shirts.

Rosa modeling San Andrés traje with the lacy-backed huipil and typically striped corte.

A detailed shot of Magdalena's belt that holds up her Quiche corte.

You see, jeans and t-shirts are actually pretty cheap and available here; they come in piles of used American clothes or ropa americana. Small stores where organized collections of ropa americana are sold are referred to as “PACA,” and the more one buys, the bigger the discount he can get. PCVs absolutely love shopping at the PACAs because it is suitable for our budgets, plus, who doesn’t like wearing American clothes? PACAs are the best for Halloween shopping or for collecting outlandish items to throw together for a PC costume party or 4^th of July! You can even find some decent stuff every now and then. Before I moved to site in July, I made a trip to a MEGAPACA to supplement my wardrobe. There I picked through all sorts of hand-me-downs with brand names including Ed Hardy, Old Navy, Abercrombie & Fitch, and Columbia and walked away with two pairs of pants and five t-shirts for 69 Quetzales—that’s equivalent to about nine American dollars. It’s no wonder Guatemalans have a hard time resisting American clothing—it’s so cheap! Not only is American clothing sold in the PACAs, but vendors come with piles and piles of clothing in the backs of pickup trucks and scattered all across a mat on the street on market days as well. Not all non-traje clothing in Guatemala is second-hand; there are many clothing stores that run a handful of clothing lines—lots in the shopping malls in Guatemala City and Xela. Ropa americana is just seen more often in the rural towns and markets (where I spend the majority of my time) than in the cities.

It’s comical to see so many Guatemalans walking around advertising places and colleges in the United States like USC, Duke University, or New York (I Love NY!) on their shirts and sweatshirts because when we see this kind of stuff on someone’s clothing in the States, we assume affiliation with what is being advertised, but here, all it is is something to wear or keep warm. It’s even funnier though when I see a random phrase in English on a person’s t-shirt and know that the person has NO clue what it means. This occurs often, and I have seen phrases like “Little Princess” and “I didn’t come here to play. I came here to win!” If I know someone well enough and he or she requests a translation, I will say what it means. Tayra asked me about one of her t-shirts once; when I told her it says “I may be cute, but I still bite,” she was so shocked and couldn’t believe she’d been wearing that all around town! It doesn’t really matter what a t-shirt says, though, if no one around can understand it. There is a lot of American influence interlaced into the culture here—the clothing just happens to be an obvious example, especially when it comes to American brand names. Everywhere I look, people are sporting Hollister, Aeropostale, and Abercrombie and Fitch. Even the women in traje sometimes wear brand-name zip-up sweaters to keep warm. Some of these are the real brand, but a couple times I’ve taken a closer look at people’s clothing as they walk by and I spy an “Hecho en Guatemala” tag right below the beautifully inscribed “Abercrombie” on the back pocket. Although much of the American clothing purchased and worn is done so out of practicality, it is considered “cool” to have any affiliation with the United States here…

Ever wonder what happens to all the clothes in your give-away pile? Well, here is one possibility... I bought an old dress to use as a mop from this guy.

I have one last note on clothing. I really don’t have much clothing here at all, and what I do have is being worn through. I have a small hole in at least half of the t-shirts that I wear regularly, but they are still functional so I don’t do anything about it. Holes and tears are simply byproducts of a rural lifestyle (as well as scrubbing laundry against a cement washboard) and are simply inevitable. I keep telling myself that every time I wash my dark blue skinny jeans in my pila and watch excessive amounts of blue dye slosh down the drain with the rinsing water; I keep wondering just how much more dye there could possibly be left in my jeans to wash away the next time… Clothing wears down so much faster here than in the Unites States that it would be a waste of money to keep replacing items that get marked or worn down in one way or another. My plan is to just keep wearing my stuff until it is basically destroyed (and I probably won’t end up bringing much of it home when I am done). This place is a perfectionist’s nightmare! A silver decorative button fell off of one of the shoes from a pair of black flats I bought here. I tried to take the button off the other one, but it is fastened on there pretty tightly. Instead of fighting with it, I decided to accept the idea that not everything in my life has to be completely symmetrical anymore. After all, the law of entropy—the second law of thermodynamics—states that “in all energy exchanges, if no energy enters or leaves the system, the potential energy of the state will always be less than that of the initial state,” which means (in non-chemistry terms) that the natural tendency of the universe is to move toward chaos and disorder. Humans are fighting a force that will always be stronger than they are. Here we think we have control over every tiny detail in our lives and that if we plan everything out as carefully as possible, it should darn well go exactly as we imagined. But how much of nature can we really tame? As soon as humans disappear from a place that has been cultivated and constructed, the wild of the natural world will creep in and devour the remnants—that is the law of the land. With that in mind, I’ll mention that I’m getting used to living with spiders. Every time I sweep them away or out a little crevice, another one moves in within a day or two. So I give up. They don’t bother me too much anymore.

There are lots of animals running wild out here. Living in a rural town, the kind of animals one may encounter on a daily basis basically include anything you might find on Old MacDonald’s farm: chickens, roosters, ducks, sheep, goats, cows, pigs, horses, donkeys, turkeys, cats, dogs, and mice—plus some frogs, weird creepy-crawlers, and fireflies. I am accustomed to any of the aforementioned animals freely wandering the streets and roaming the land—the funniest animals for sure are the pigs that scamper and squeal all through town. Guatemala has some “exotic” creatures as well such as monkeys and toucans, but those animals are found more often in the north eastern parts of the country where the rainforest lies, the altitude is lower, and the vegetation is denser than where I am living. As far as the general attitude toward animals goes, people here actually treat them like animals and dominate them as opposed to treating them like humans and giving them “equal rights,” per se. Whereas in the United States, people talk to their animals and treat them as if they were part of the family, having a cat or dog in Guatemala is usually motivated by practical purposes such as guarding the house or eliminating rodents. Here, there are not little frilly costumes and fancy dog apartments or kitty-carriers like in the States—no special comforts or privileges for the animals. If people do have pets (cats, dogs, and birds) and go as far as naming their pets, they often give them random names for things such as “Fuscia,” which is a color—(and the animal really isn’t even that color). One of the cats in my house was named “Cosita,” which literally means “little thing.” Right in line with my all-American training, I have given the three newest feline additions to my household “people names,” and I have picked up on the notion that several Guatemalans who enter my house regularly think I am slightly strange not only for the naming but also for the affectionate way I handle the animals.

The update on my kittens is that they are now about two and a half months old and playful as ever! Their little personalities have developed; Bella is my favorite, the one who looks just like her momma, as she is the most curious, independent, and fearless of the three. She is my little project. I am trying to socialize her, and she even hops up on my lap every morning and curls up there as I am eating my breakfast. Nacho, the orange one, killed and ate a small mouse the other day so, although he is a little schizophrenic and whiny, I decided that he can stick around (as if I had a choice in the matter!). Just a few days after I made that “decision,” Doña Gloria showed up with some people who came to collect Nacho to use as a mouse-hunter in their own home. It was just another reminder of how I cannot rely on anything to stay permanent in this country. I did, however, request to Doña Gloria that she not sell Bella while I am away. The others could go and I wouldn’t care—Cosita is really annoying anyway, but not my pretty little Bella! As far as mama cat goes, well, guess what? I think she’s pregnant again! I told Don Asisclo (Doña Gloria’s husband and the father to the owner of the house I’m living in) that I need to teach this cat a thing or two about family planning, and he laughed and said, “Well, she sure is Guatemalan, isn’t she?” Coming from a 75-year-old man who has 10 kids and has never had a wife (he and Doña Gloria are “unidos,” which is unofficial and like a step below marriage and being “spouses”), that comment was priceless. He of all people would know just how Guatemalan that cat is…

The kittens, Nacho, Serena, & Bella, cuddled up next to mama cat on my kitchen table.

When I returned to my town at the end of November, San Andrés was celebrating féria. Every town celebrates féria once a year in commemoration of the saint for whom the town is named. Officially it is a religious (Catholic) celebration, but really it is just a reason to have a big party! The best way to describe féria is like a county fair or a mini-carnival. Each town designates about eight days to its féria, but the pre-party starts about a month in advance. The vendors arrive, set up their stands, and trigger the merrymaking mode all through the town. There are all sorts of special féria foods including taco stands, pizza, garnachas (small fried tortilla topped with a special meat/onion/cheese mixture), chocolate covered fruit and marshmallows, warm drinks, and roscas (a round sweet biscuit kind of thing that is great for dipping in coffee or tea). They even set-up popcorn and cotton candy stands! There are a variety of carnival games and small rides for kids, usually including a ferris wheel. There is also a schedule of activities that include parades or processions, performances of masked and costumed dancers, live music, a presentation of the “chosen” female representatives of the town, and big dances in the town hall that start in the late evening and last into the wee hours of the morning. Basically, everyone in town and any work they have to do halts so everyone has the opportunity to join in on the fun during féria. This is the rule of thumb for all holidays in Guatemala (and there seems to be a holiday for everything!), it is just that a town’s féria is the most exciting and lasts the longest.

Speaking of holidays, Christmas is just a few days away. I know it has been coming all during the month of December, but it really hasn’t felt like it at all. I know it all has to do with the weather. There is no rain (that stopped in October with the exception of an occasional sprinkle), and obviously no snow in 99% of the country, so my brain is getting confused trying to put winter and holiday season together when it’s still hot outside. I was expecting it to get colder in my site, but the average temperature has been between 68 and 75 daily (only slightly chillier than that during the night), and some people still walk around in shorts and a t-shirt. Once the temperature drops to 67, no one in town can stop talking about how cold it is! Lucky for me, I guess, since I don’t do the cold very well…  And since the only gauge I have on December is the calendar hanging on my wall, for the first time in my life since I ever took any responsibility for Christmas (decorating, gift-buying, etc.), I don’t feel that pressure of the holiday countdown. It is kind of nice to not have that applied stress coming from every direction—media, grocery stores, family, friends, work, etc—that becomes inescapable starting right around Thanksgiving, but I do miss the “holiday spirit” that I am accustomed to at home.

Granted, Guatemalans do celebrate Christmas, too, so everyone here is doing their holiday preparations and a lot of what they do here is similar to how Americans prepare and celebrate, but I still can’t bring myself to believe that Christmas is coming. There are [mostly fake] Christmas trees put up, blinking lights strung across houses, stores, and trees, and Christmas music playing randomly here and there. It’s mostly American Christmas music (in English) which I think is pretty funny because, once again, most of the people here have no clue what the lyrics are, but they play it and listen to it because it has been dubbed “Christmas” music. It is the same for mainstream popular music as well—it’s mostly in English. I enjoy it because I am singing right along with Phil Collins, Roxette, Michael Jackson, and the like, but I am the only one singing along and it always makes me laugh to myself. The amount of American influence seen in this culture is unbelievable. Even during the holiday parade in the capital that aired live on TV in the middle of November, the dancers in the parade had choreographed their performances to English holiday songs, for example Jessica Simpson’s “Let It Snow.” They also had parts of the parade where snowmen and fake snow had their own set. I don’t think a single person in Guatemala has ever played in the snow or built a snowman in Guatemala, thus I think it is interesting and slightly odd that they would include those things in their holiday festivities. It goes to show how much cultural cross-over exists and how impressionable Guatemala is when the United States is “talking.” I appreciate the culture exchange as that is what I am doing here each day, it just bothers me a little bit that Guatemalans place the United States in such a superior position. I have more thoughts on this topic, but I’ll save them for later. It is just that when someone is always trying so hard to be so much like someone else, it is easy to lose track of his or her own identity. There is a Christmas tradition that is practiced in many parts of Guatemala (and other Latin American countries, I’m sure) call the Posada. It is a Catholic tradition where every night for about a week and a half before Christmas, groups of people go around their hometown carrying lanterns, knocking on doors, and singing back and forth to the people at the doors. It is a reenactment of Mary and Joseph’s journey looking for an inn or somewhere to stay in the days just before Jesus’ birth. The reenactment is pre-planned with who will participate and whose houses will be involved. The “singing battle” at the doors represents each time Mary and Joseph were turned away. Every night at the end of the procession, all involved share a meal and time together at one of the houses. The journey continues until Jesus is born. It is a beautiful tradition.

December is a difficult month to make much progress with work in this country because of all the festivities and vacationing going on for the holidays. Perry and I did spend the first two weeks in December with our noses to the grind to get as much done as possible before everything “stopped.” We have shifted the focus of our work to house visits as we are trying to make assessments and diagnostics of our two communities, Limón and Pajquiej. We only visited about half of the houses in each community, so we will continue with that in January. We are also gearing up toward starting a health promoter group in Pajquiej. Individually, I am planning to set up work for myself in three different grade schools, and I am going to start inviting ladies over to my house for an hour once a week on “Workout Wednesdays” where I plan to lead some basic cardio, yoga, toning, and stretching as well as share some information weekly about women’s health. Rosa’s mom also requested that I do charlas for her and the families who live around her. So I may start up a little group in San Andrés, and I am thinking that I will gear it toward nutrition and even start doing cooking classes if there is enough interest. I am feeling very settled in my home and my town, and I am prepared to jump in with both feet in January. I definitely have my work cut out for me, and I couldn’t be more excited about it!

Here are a couple "California Girls" representing Peace Corps: Kathy, Anna, me, Ale, and Kate. Just another wonderful memory of my time out here so far!

During Christmastime, most PCVs take vacation since there is not much work for us to do in our towns. A handful of people travel to neighboring countries such as Mexico, Belize, and Nicaragua, but many PCVs go back home for the holidays. I am excited to say that I am one of those flying home! Goin’ to California!!! Originally, I didn’t plan on visiting home during my entire first year away, but two of my wonderful college friends, Russell and Maricela, are tying the knot just a few days after Christmas, and I promised them (before I joined the Peace Corps) that I wouldn’t miss their wedding. It’s perfect timing actually because I am attending the wedding and I also get to spend the holidays with my family. And, boy, am I ready to see my family!!! I cannot wait! I am looking forward to some good quality time with my loved ones, and I know it will be just the right amount of “refresh” to get me geared up for the new year. I wish you all a Merry Christmas filled with many blessings and lots of love shared! And I hope that your holiday season is as wonderful as mine is going to be!

Love,

Alexandra

EXTRA! EXTRA!

Thank you, Teri, for the fantastic care package with letters from the fam (and the photo)! It was very thoughtful and I enjoyed each little thing.

Thanks to all of YOU who continue to read my story; it is the best way for me to share my experiences with you without you actually being physically present in Guatemala.

Congratulations to Mari and Russell on your upcoming marriage!

Congratulations to my best friend, Linda, and her husband, Robert, who just found out that they are expecting their second child. (And thank you for calling to tell me about it!)

Heads up! For anyone who has been making plans to come visit me, as the New Year approaches, I encourage you to start looking at your calendar and setting dates. The years go by faster than we expect sometimes, and it is nice to have some time to prepare for a big (or small) trip—on both your end and mine. The months with the best weather for traveling are February through June, November, and December. (September and October are really bad so I advise against planning a trip for those months.) Get in contact with me if you are serious! Friends and family are always welcome.

Having identified this punctuality standard for Latin America, I was both relieved and apprehensive when I found out that my assignment was for Guatemala. You see, I have somehow created my own reputation for being slow and punctually retarded over the years. As much as I would like to claim inheritance of these hand-in-hand traits from BOTH of my parents, I suppose I should own up to it this time. Does anyone remember that clay-mation cartoon “Gumby”? Well, my sisters and I used to watch it all the time when we were little; we called my sister Christie “Gumby” because she was so tall, and guess who got dubbed “Pokey,” the tag-a-long, orange, sidekick donkey? Yours, truly. One time in grade school, I wanted to get the perfect attendance award so badly that I was determined not to miss a single day of school that year, and so I didn’t; I would have received the award had it not been for the copious collection of tardies on my report card. I think that let down jaded me for life. In college, I knew it took exactly 8 minutes to walk from my dorm room to the science building and so I would depart my house 8 minutes before class started, never taking into account how long it would take me to ascend several flights of stairs or wait for the elevator. Same thing for driving to work: I could make it there in 27 minutes during rush hour (although sometimes it required occasionally slipping in and out of the carpool lane)! Unfortunately, the result has been that I am consistently two to five minutes late to everything routine – guaranteed. And if it’s a party or something else casual, you can put bets on me being around an hour behind. (At least I’m consistent – does that count for anything)? So you can imagine my relief in believing that I would not have to struggle much to fit into the time scheme of Guatemala. But then a dreadful thought occurred to me: what if after living here for two years, the culture of time would have a negative effect on me and actually worsen my habitual lateness? Like punctual retardation squared? That would be a compound problem, no doubt, and I would feel terrible for anyone who would have to put up with me. So, following an examination of hora chapina, I’ll let you know how things are working out…

I arrived a whole day behind to my weekend getaway to Panajachel, but I still got to spend some time with my good friend and fellow PCV, Megan.

Driven by the pressure to be successful and the ticking away of clocks haunting them like the croc who stalks Captain Hook (prompting his anxiety) in Peter Pan, Americans never seem to have enough time. Whereas in the United States and probably other first world countries as well, time is money and the people both work for it and are at the mercy of it, Guatemalans make time bow down and kiss the ground they walk on. While delving into the topic a bit further, I discovered that this conspicuous cultural phenomenon is not only characteristic to Latin America but to many other developing nations as well. The disparity between the concepts of time functionality can be described by the terms “monochronic” and “polychronic.” The following definitions of these two terms are taken from a book we all got during PST called Culture Matters: The Peace Corps Cross-Cultural Workbook, and I will be using some information from this book (pages 104-105, in particular) in the following paragraphs to help explain the topic. Monochronic: Time is the given and people are the variable. The needs of people are adjusted to suit the demands of time—schedules, deadlines, etc. Time is quantifiable, and a limited amount of it is available. People do one thing at a time and finish it before starting something else, regardless of circumstances. Polychronic: Time is the servant and tool of the people. Time is adjusted to suit the needs of people. More time is available, and you are never too busy. People often have to do several things simultaneously, as required by circumstances. It’s not necessary to finish one thing before starting another, nor to finish your business with one person before starting in with another. Americans tend to fall into the monochronic category while Guatemalans are ruled by a polychronic lifestyle. (Keep these terms close as I will be discussing them further as the chapter continues)!

Here is a universal illustration of relaxation – feet propped up overlooking a beautiful lake. These are my feet over Lago de Atitlán.

Now carrying over 6 months in country, I believe I have experienced enough to acquire rights to objectively write on this fascinating idea called time. Everyone is always talking about it – here and back home. “I can’t believe she’s a year old already! Where has this year gone?” or “I have so much to do; I don’t know how I’ll ever finish by the end of the month!” or “Yes, I want to hang out, but my schedule’s booked for the next three weeks.” Sound familiar? Something that might come from my dad: “It’s just been non-stop here lately. Training for a new computer system, work meetings, then Lyndsie’s piano recital, so-and-so’s wedding, church conference all week, have to fix the sink, drive two bus routes on Sunday, trying to work on my truck, and then the holidays are just around the corner – and you know how busy that time of year is!” This might be typical from my mom: “Oh, my gosh! It’s Christmas Eve already and I haven’t wrapped a single gift yet!” Guatemalans talk about time, too, but with a much less crowded perspective. For example, I hear a lot of “What’s the date today?” because no one really keeps track. Along with the date come questions about what time it is because there are hardly any clocks on the walls nor watches on people’s wrists. People here are often looking for new ways to pass the time as opposed to scrounging around frantically for any handful of free seconds they could possibly squeeze in to take a breather. I don’t get it. It makes me wonder how each concept of time came to be and – like the chicken or egg debate about which came first – whether it is the habits of people that dictate their culture or a culture and its degree of development that create the habits of its people. And does one’s culture have such a strong influence over a person’s habits that it makes it practically impossible for a polychronic-reared person to function in a monochronic society – or vice-versa? Or is it just a matter of adaptability and molding one’s habits to slip into the pace of the society in which he or she is trying to live? I don’t think I’ll come up with the answers by the end of the chapter, but at least I can investigate…

Let’s start with meetings, parties, get-togethers, and any other things with a supposed start time or due date. Whereas in a monochronic society, schedules are sacred, in polychronic Guatemala, deadlines are mere approximations. Most people show up half an hour to an hour after the start time, and if they do show up “on time,” they already have the expectation that they will be waiting for a good chunk of time while everyone else trickles in. Instead of beginning at the start time, most events commence when the person running them decides he or she is ready to start. Also, the polychronic concept that “to be late is simply to be late” like it’s no big deal can be observed in the Guatemalan belief that it is courtesy for a person to announce his presence to everyone in the room when he arrives late (aka if everyone else has already started) with a “Buenos días” or a “Buenas tardes” to acknowledge the group and even a couple handshakes if he feels like it. This was definitely an awkward thing to get used to since in the US, to be late is considered rude, and if a person happens to find himself in that position, he tries his hardest to tiptoe his way in to the back of the room as invisible, silent, and non-disruptive as possible. And if he doesn’t have such a graceful entrance, everyone around him may act annoyed, and the situation could be an embarrassing one for the perpetrator. Arriving and entering late is considered an interruption which is “bad” in a monochronic society; conversely, Guatemalans view interruptions as a part of life and welcome them with open arms. For example, cell phones are never turned off during meetings or visits. If a person gets a call, he or she is expected to take it. People answer phone calls all the time here – during dinner, while driving, at the doctor’s office, basically all the “no-no” places to answer your phone in the United States. And there is no “Can I call you back? I’m busy right now.” The conversation is always carried out. It can be a little nerve-racking when the driver on your chicken bus or micro takes a phone call at the same time he starts sliding into the lane of oncoming traffic while speeding up so he can pass another chicken bus in front of him. (Even if there were laws against talking on the phone while driving here, there really would be no way to enforce them). Lastly, in regards to getting some sort of project finished, there may be a deadline or due date, but that usually stands in more as a focus point to get (or keep) the project moving and should be taken with a grain of salt. This is yet another example of monochronic versus polychronic: Americans tend to be task-oriented and concentrate on getting the job done whereas Guatemalans are focused more on people and establishing relationships. Guatemalans don’t mind letting life happen – even if it means putting a project on hold.

This is Taira and Osman in front of the house we live in, waiting for guests to arrive for Sarahy’s birthday party. The 3 o’clock party “started” sometime between 3:30 and 4.

A very good example of life happening here is called rain. I have begun to refer to Guatemala as the land of eternal unpredictability, but if there is one thing a person can absolutely count on every time, it is that if it is raining, people are not going to leave their houses to go to some event (unless it is really important, like a graduation or wedding or something). I don’t blame them. With unpaved or uneven roads, rain usually means lots of mud and puddles as well as wet clothes, wet shoes, and mud tracks all over the house. Without washing machines, dryers, complete insulation, consistently paved roads, or efficient drainage, rain can be pretty inconvenient here. There is hardly ever notification if plans are cancelled due to rain – it is just understood that no one is going to show. Rainy season is from May through October – heavier in the latter months, so we have experienced several “rainy day” situations since our arrival in site. Back in August, a group of us ladies from the health center formed a basketball team to compete in the annual Quiché health fair women’s basketball tournament. The plan was to have practice three times a week, and they always scheduled it for 5 PM. The funny thing was at that time of the year, a storm would roll in regularly almost every afternoon beginning between 3:30 and 4:30. Needless to say, we only successfully had one or two practices. (San Andrés ended up not having a team this year, but two of us jumped ship and play for Canillá, landing 3^rd place in the tournament). Another situation came up with going out to the aldeas. A few weeks ago, we were on our way out to an aldea to weigh babies in the morning when it started dumping. To get to this particular aldea, we have to take a car for 15-20 minutes, then climb a steep hill for another 20 minutes straight up to get to the school where the ladies congregate with their children. That day, there was no transportation that passed us by and we would have had to walk about three hours total in the downpour to get to that aldea. So we just didn’t go, and chances are, no one would have showed up that day with their babies anyway! That day also happened to be the beginning of a two-week long storm that swept the country, leading to a declared nationwide “State of Calamity” due to rising rivers, landslides, and all-around dangerous road conditions. During this time, PC ordered a “Standfast” for all PCVs, meaning that we were not allowed to be traveling and needed to remain in our sites. It’s not like I could go anywhere even if I wanted to because all public transportation in and out of my town had ceased – the micro drivers were refusing to drive because the road to Quiché (the unpaved one) was so bad that they all kept getting stuck in the mud and couldn’t pass. It was like a giant game of slip-n-slide for trucks, vans, and busses. Only it wasn’t fun. When I headed out for my weekend getaway at the lake that very first weekend in October, I didn’t get very far the day I left my site; our micro got stuck in the mud. It took me six hours to get to Quiché that day instead of the usual two. The experience I had out there on the road was unforgettable, really cool, and even kind of fun, actually, but it is probably something I’ll only want to do once in my life.

The day I headed out for my weekend getaway, this is what happened to the micro I was in. Here’s a good look at our road during rainy season!

In a monochronic society, when plans are made, once agreed upon, they are fixed. On the contrary, in a polychronic culture like Guatemala’s, nothing is ever set in stone – plans are often changed around or cancelled if something else comes up that is considered to be more pressing or important. There is a very common phrase that is used among Guatemalans that illustrates this ever-changing mindset. It starts out with,“Fíjese que…,” translates to, “Well, it turns out that…,” and is usually followed by the reason that the person has to withdraw from the commitment they had made with another person, group, or project. Anytime a person hears a sentence started with this phrase, he should automatically tap into his Plan B, because by the time one is accustomed to hearing it, that person should know good and well to go everywhere with a backup plan tucked away somewhere in one of his pockets. “Fíjese que…” can actually be considered a courtesy because half the time when someone has to change his or her plans, notification to other parties involved isn’t practiced. This may be related to the cultural trend where direct communication is lacking in order to avoid the awkwardness of confronting or disappointing someone. So if a person is used to direct communication and has an event or meeting planned, it is good practice for that persone in order to have any peace of mind here to expect to be left in the dust regularly. Anything could happen! Geez! No one knows what life is going to throw at them at any given moment! Sick child, phone call from a relative, event in the park, somebody’s birthday, power outage, escaped farm animal running loose on the road – why, these are things that aren’t always predictable or preventable but are very much a part of life, and you can’t expect them to fall perfectly within the boundaries of a set window of time. No boundaries and no limits here. And trust me, that phrase runs deep and steady in this Guatemalan culture just as blood runs through the veins of its people.

On another note regarding windows of time, we Americans are used to stores having “hours of operation” signs posted on their doors, and often store owners like to cater to the needs of their clientele – staying open later and keeping all items well-stocked for the convenience of the customer. Well, “customers” aren’t so spoiled here. Many families run small shops, called “tiendas,” right off of their houses. There is a range in the variety of merchandise available from eggs, sugar, milk, and other grocery items to candy, sodas, snacks and basically anything you could find at a 7-Eleven (except exchanged for the Guatemalan brand) – even laundry soap; then you have the stores that sell plastic or electrical appliances for around the house, clothing and shoes, baked goods, raw meat, and even internet and phone credit “recharges.” These stores have very loose hours of operation. This is how it works: tiendas are open when their doors are open and people are there, and there’s no way to predict when they are NOT going to be there. Also, if you go in for a particular item, let’s say toilet paper, and there isn’t any in stock, the store owner will simply tell you, “No hay” or “Se acabó” (which mean “there is none” or “it ran out”) in such a way that he is conceding that there is nothing he can do about it and you should go somewhere else. He’s not worried about losing business. Someday, he’ll have more toilet paper in stock, he’ll sell it until he runs out, and then he’ll be out until he gets more – whenever that may be. There’s no telling.

Taking into account the possibility of life events happening randomly, Guatemalans do not do a lot of planning ahead. When we have a community meeting or charla in one of our aldeas, the dates are scheduled as we go. There is no master plan or syllabus to stick to. We just show up, do our thing, and at the end of the charla throw out a possible topic and date two to four weeks in the future for the next meeting. Sometimes people remember, and sometimes they don’t. I usually call the appointed contact in the town a couple hours before just to confirm – there is no sense calling too far in advance. And unless there is some other big event occurring near a particular community the day we plan to have a charla there, we can bet that people will come to our charla. You see, people are never too busy here (or in other polychronic societies). Perry and one of the guys from the health center, Lisandro, went up to the park to play basketball a few weekends ago, and just as they started, one of Lisandro’s friends drove by. They asked him if he wanted to play, and since he didn’t have anything to do, he just parked and jumped right in with them for an hour or two. This situation falls in line with the tendency of people here to just plan everything as it goes. This leaves plenty of un-booked time to engage in leisure activities whenever one feels like it. (Granted, there is not an abundance of entertainment options the farther away from a city you go, but that factor could contribute to a completely different topic so I won’t go there just yet).

This is Taira and I on the day of Sarahy’s birthday party. Taira planned the party and made all the invitations and decorations by hand. She passed out invitations for the party only 4 or 5 days in advance.

Consequently, with the lack of planning ahead comes very little stability. Many workplaces here have yearly contracts, and every January jobs are either renewed or given out to a fresh batch of people. This happens mainly with city jobs as opposed to privates enterprises because the power to assign city jobs (like positions in teaching, the health field, and in the municipal office, etc.) goes directly to the mayor and other government officials. So for workers in any of these fields, keeping a job depends solely on the luck of the draw, the whim of the government officials, and the chance of whether or not they personally know the mayor as opposed to having merit or consistency of performance. Thus, many families can only plan one year at a time and may not ever get their roots down anywhere because they may be constantly moving to find work (or trying to go to the States to find more consistent work than they have here). On the bright side, although there is no guarantee of a stable income, this situation allows for a significant amount of freedom and flexibility of schedule and location. Just as I started getting excited about some great ideas and work plans I had formed with my counterparts for the next couple months when I plan to get started in two or three schools, I learned that everything could change in January. So much for that! Who knows if they’ll even be here in January! There are fewer nurses available, so Magdalena, Pascuala, and Marli have better chances of sticking around, but my dear Rosa – the one who never fails to show up and who has been working very closely with me – has a much slimmer chance of job renewal. She is an “educator,” and apparently there is a long waitlist of teachers/educators looking for work. When I first found out that the health center may get a completely new slew of employees in a couple months, I was a little frustrated, thinking, “Why the heck did they make us think we were building trust for a working relationship with these girls if they are just going to yank them away from us?” It doesn’t make sense to me that some institutions start over completely from scratch every year – no wonder you can’t get sustainability here! But this is the system, and I cannot control it, so why bother with frustration? I just have to accept the way it works and learn to work within [or around] it. Even if Rosa isn’t employed in a few months, I know she is willing to come out with me to a handful of aldeas a couple times a month – that is, if she still decides to live in San Andrés. We have already started making our backup plans, and we will just have to wait and see what happens… Our current mayor lost the election this year which means the town gets screwed over while the mayor hoards as much money as he can for the next couple months until the new mayor takes office. Why shouldn’t he take the money from the people? He doesn’t know when he’ll have access to a solid income again, and he has to take care of his family and his own needs, right? Lol. Unfortunately, the political realm has control over even basic human necessities such as water. My water doesn’t come every day anymore – it is turned off every second, third, or fourth day now. We have backup water stored, but it’s just the inconsistency that is so characteristic of a place like this that makes me both annoyed and entertained. Shoot, even with cell phones, there are no plans and contracts. People just buy phone credit as they need it. As you can probably gather, if you want to experience a place where every day you have to fly by the seat of your pants, just go spend some time in a developing nation where there is so little to depend on…

That moves me right along to the topic of transportation. No one can never really rely on there being transportation or how long they’ll have to wait to get to their destinations once they do get a ride, so they might as well bring a book to read or something else to do to pass the time. Being made to wait is normal here – the world does not revolve around the individual. Lol. Transportation is tricky, though. The micros leave promptly or as soon as they are full, so people have to get there on time or early in order to get a seat. One time I was even early and waiting for the 8:45 micro to pick me up, but by the time it got to me, it was packed to the brim and couldn’t take any more people! That day I started walking and, as luck would have it, I got a ride to Quiché in the back of a pickup. Hitchhiking has a completely different connotation in Guatemala than it does in the States. Here, it is safe! Hitching a ride with a passing car is something practically everyone does if they don’t have their own vehicle – and even sometimes if they do. This is especially common out in the rural parts of the country. Another thing to consider for transportation is that road conditions are often unpredictable, as pointed out above with the big October storm. No one ever stresses in situations like that, though, because they know there is nothing they can do about it. Road rage is practically nonexistent in this country – at least when you are away from the cities. People just roll with the punches and deal with each situation as it presents itself. There is not a lot of worry – especially not over losing time. When traveling through Guatemala, putting a whole day (or at least half) aside to get from point A to point B is customary. My PST host family from Alotenango lives just outside of Antigua, which is about five hours away from my site. I swear the way I measure time is warped now… A five to six hour trip here is no big deal; you get there when you get there and just plan to leave at a time that puts you at your destination before dark. If I wanted to go for a cross-country trip here, I could just hop on public transportation and get to pretty much anywhere I want in this country within a day or two. Visiting my host family, which I have done three times since I moved to my site, takes just as long as it would for me to take a trip from my house down to Southern California, which I used to do a handful of times every year. There are two differences, however: one is that catching four different routes and people-watching on the chicken busses is definitely more interesting than Highway 5, and two, I don’t get as exhausted since I’m not the one driving – although sometimes I wish I were! I do miss my car on a regular basis, especially the trunk. My car wouldn’t last a week out here on this terrain, but it is the space and independence I miss. Oh, how I crave order some days! Order and organization on the roads, in grocery stores, and even when we go to the schools to weigh kids. I am really sick of people cutting in front of me when I am “in line” at the store since I am accustomed to the American monochronic mindset that people actually do wait in a line for their turn. Even when we try to organize the chaos of baby-weighing, in many aldeas the women just swarm around our table from every direction shoving their child’s records in our faces. When I have tried to ask the ladies to form a line, most of the time they just smirk at me with a look that says, “You’re joking, right?” It was a little overwhelming at first, but all I can do is laugh at it now. By stressing out about it, I would only be hurting myself.

There is so much waiting around when it comes to transportation that people have plenty of time to get some reading done or even slip in a catnap, as this guy is demonstrating on the chicken bus.

That’s another thing. The overall stress level in people’s lives here is low. Life happens, and there is sometimes nothing anyone can do about it. There is no sense in complaining because that doesn’t change anything and no one here is going to feel sorry for anyone else, so people might as well keep moving. To Guatemalans, the world does not stop spinning on its axis if something bad happens. Life goes on and they go right on with it… Since start times and deadlines are relative, and life events are not calculated or measured by the passing of time, there is not a lot of pressure on people on a daily basis. So which is better – a society in which things may or may not ever get done, there are few guarantees of anything, yet minimal levels of stress or a society in which productivity reigns as projects are successfully completed and predictability is the law of the land but nothing is really ever finished as there will always be something else to do and thus very little time to rest? Is it naïve to take time for granted, believing that there will always be more of it, like Guatemalans do? Or is it Americans who are ignorant, always racing the clock and afraid that the sand is going to run out? If they are so worried about the sand running out, they’re going to end up spending their whole lives watching each grain fall until there is nothing left and it’s all over. That would be sad…and pretty boring, I think. With all their fretting, Americans have brought upon themselves so many health problems ranging from high blood pressure and heart attacks to anxiety, insomnia, and stress-triggered outbreaks of various strains of the Herpes virus, for example shingles, which is acutely associated with the nervous system. (These are only a few examples). I’m no psychologist (so don’t hold me to anything I say here), but I’m going to go out on a limb and say that even depression is caused by stress and time pressure in people’s lives. Depression is connected to feelings of worthlessness and not making the mark or “succeeding.” It’s when people feel like they are not good enough. To whose standard are they holding themselves, I would like to know? My goodness, we are so hard on ourselves! Now, how many cases of clinical depression have you heard of in third world countries? There aren’t many, I can assure you. So what’s the problem? Too much time on our hands to get all tangled up in our own minds? Or not enough time to keep our heads clear and priorities straightened out?

This is Lago de Atitlán, a place where both Americans and Guatemalans go to de-stress. The lake is spotted with 3 volcanoes along its border, and the town of Panajachel is in the center of the photo at the edge of the lake.

Everywhere you go in the world, you will find that people and cultures have different priorities from your own. If I made it seem like Guatemalans don’t have a lot of health problems from the paragraph above, in this section I will enlighten you about some of the types of problems they deal with that are uncommon or even unheard of in more developed parts of the world. In mid-October, a team of doctors and administrators working with an NGO called “Partners for Surgery” came to San Andrés to give consultations and examinations at our health center to people who may qualify for a free surgery for various conditions including cleft lips/palettes, hernias, tumors, fused or extra digits, ovarian cysts, and prolapsed uteri, among others. The three doctors giving examinations were Canadian and spoke limited Spanish; I was used as a translator for the entire day to the doctor who knew practically zero español. My counterpart, Rosa, also helped us out that day by translating K’iche’ to Spanish when necessary. So Karen (the doctor), Rosa, and I teamed up and worked straight till 3 in the afternoon. (It was refreshing to have a really busy day at the health center)! I basically got to be Karen’s shadow for the entire day, translating for her wherever she went, observing the work she was doing, and asking questions. Since she was the only female doctor, all the women with “lady problems” were sent to us. It was an extremely eye-opening experience as I saw some things that I didn’t even know could happen to people.Women came in with their uteri falling out – eight, nine, or eleven kids later. I saw two that were literally 90% of the way outside of their bodies! I also went with Doctor Karen while she performed procedures – removing a polyp from the cervix of two different women who were getting the NGO-offered “rapid test” PAP smear in another room. (Of the forty-something PAPs they did that day, HPV was only detected in one lady). We also had a hernia case in a two-year-old boy. His hernia was about the size of a golf ball in his right testicle and was inhibiting proper growth of his right leg – which was stick-thin, preventing him from walking. These are just a handful of cases that qualified for the surgery. (A team of different doctors will come out in a couple months to perform the surgeries). The experience I had that day really made an impression on me. It was probably one of the more rewarding days I’ve had out here so far – I felt so exhilarated by the end of it and just sat on the edge of my bed that afternoon trying to process the day and the bazillion thoughts that were running through my head. In addition to the amazing things I saw, I ended the day finally believing that am pretty fluent in Spanish. Thinking that my vocabulary was insufficient, I was a little apprehensive to translate for a doctor in a medical situation, but the whole day was such a huge success that my confidence was definitely boosted (although there is always more to learn). Also, considering the events in my life that happened earlier that same week, I can easily say that my experience that day could not have come at a more perfect time in regards to re-engaging me to be 100% immersed in this country and what I am doing here.

Most of my work involves hiking to aldeas, and since I don’t have a puppy of my own, I just adopt the tag-a-longs that follow us from their houses along our path – only for about a half an hour at a time.

There are many other common illnesses in Guatemala that people in the States do not encounter regularly. These have less to do with birth defects and deformities that are simply a byproduct of a lifestyle that is hard on one’s body and more to do with living conditions and hygiene. This is directly related to my work as a health promoter – seeking to educate families and implement behavior change. Some of the leading threats to people’s health and even lives out here include diarrheal disease, upper respiratory infections (such as tuberculosis and pneumonia), malnutrition, parasitic infections, Hepatitis, malaria, dengue fever, dermatitis (skin conditions), and freak accidents. The last time I visited my family in Alotenango (a little over a week ago), I got an update of everything that’s going on. The news of the town is that a 10-year-old child was kidnapped, a drunk driver ran into a mother and her two children walking along the street, killing one of the kids, and three people were in a motorcycle accident when it lost control going around a turn and started rolling – the driver, a father of three, died and the other two passengers are in grave condition. All this happened in ONE week! To top it off, upon arriving at the house, I learned that my 23-year-old host sister, Xiomara (the youngest, married one), has had paralysis in both of her legs for about a month and can’t walk right now; she’s been in the hospital for a week and a half, and the doctors are supposed to be doing some tests soon to figure out what the cause is. (Please say a prayer for her and my family here). When any “freak accident” or anything like the aforementioned occurs in the United States, it is considered tragic, but here it seems that these things are normal and that the people are accustomed to them. It’s a different world. And it is inevitable that when there are no guarantees, people place a different value on life and loved ones. Maybe things aren’t taken for granted so much when one never knows how long they are going to last…

That idea triggers my thoughts on the concept of failure. I have noticed that my fear of failure has pretty much vanished here, and I wonder how much it is connected to time pressure. Before, I never wanted to do something incorrectly or badly because I didn’t think I would have the time to go back and fix it. It had to be just right on the first try or I wouldn’t do it at all. Also, believing I didn’t have enough time to complete something used to scare me out of starting anything, but here, I feel like if something doesn’t turn out right, it’s no big deal because I will have plenty of opportunities to try it again if I want to. For example, I didn’t used to cook very much back in the States. I had two staple dishes to my name: chicken divan and banana cream pie from scratch. I believed that I didn’t really know how to cook and so I stayed pretty far away from the kitchen, eating mostly “easy-prep” things, like cereal and taquitos or restaurant food, and I was content with that. But now since my health and nutrition are in my own hands, I had to get over my fear of creating a kitchen catastrophe and just get in there and start experimenting. The first time I cooked black beans, I didn’t cook them long enough, and I used WAY too much salt. The second time, I burned them. And the third time, I forgot to add salt. Making those mistakes didn’t bother me, though, nor did it deter me from trying again. Having the willingness to mess up is the tool necessary to make something great. I am happy to say that I regularly whip up tasty batches of black beans now, and I am morphing from a clumsy caterpillar into an agile butterfly in the kitchen. Another thing is that I am not afraid to mess up an idea or activity at a charla we are doing. It takes a little while to learn the system of communication with the people in each aldea so if something doesn’t go so smoothly, I’ll just think of a way to be more effective the next time. I believe failure is a notion conceived by an individual based on the expectation of his or her own performance. As a performer, I have struggled with this concept for years being so afraid at times that what came out of my mouth wasn’t going to be perfect, I could hardly even open my mouth to sing. Well, that was silly! All the business of not being “good enough” can sure immobilize a person sometimes, and just think of how much life a person could miss out on if he or she is stuck like that! Taking chances is the name of the game; there are no guarantees for anything after all. And if you don’t step out on a limb, how the heck are you going to be able to test yourself to see how much you are really capable of doing? (Of course, I guess not everybody always wants to know how much they are capable of). There is a famous question-quote that is perfectly thought-provoking for this topic. It is “What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?” If you believe hard enough, you may get the feeling that nothing is impossible and that you have the world at your fingertips. So, think about it: if you removed all time constraints and pressure in your life, what would YOU do? Where would you spend your time?

Here I am with Sarahy, who is now 4 years old and reminds me so much of my little niece, Riann. I miss my family, but at least I can spend some time with my pseudo-family here.

Nike has their famous “Just Do It” slogan, but it seems so difficult to implement in the United States – you can’t “just do it” when there are deadlines to meet and so much more to do. Here in Guatemala, I am “just doing” more things without worrying than I ever did at home. (Granted, I don’t have to worry about earning a living). For instance, I am going to run in my very first half-marathon this coming weekend. If I were in the States, I’d be thinking, “No way! I’m not prepared for that.” But I figure if I just start and keep moving, I’ll eventually cross the finish line… My friend Russell wrote a book several years ago about his adventures in Ecuador (which I was a small part of) and Mexico and his personal development that took place during a span of several months at the end of college. He gave me a copy to read when he was finished. I always intended to get to it, but just let it sit on a shelf – never seeming to have the time to pick it up and start reading. I had it sent to me from home a few months ago, and I finally read it. It was very insightful and entertaining with parts making me laugh so hard that I started crying. I just wonder though, what took me so long to open it up? By observing how my own habits have changed here, I think back to the question from the beginning about whether it is possible for people from one world of time to get by in a world that functions on an entirely different concept of time from the one they already know. I sometimes wonder if, when I go home, I will fall back into the fast-paced lifestyle that seems necessary in order to “succeed” in the US – that which I have always known, or if I will be able to maintain the easygoing pace of Latin America. I have productivity ingrained in my being, and with all the reading and writing I’ve been doing lately, I see that it has only taken a little spare time to myself to get back in touch with my studious nature. But is it just a matter of a series of trivial distractions that can sweep a person away from his or her own nature or desires? Can the workings of a society have that much influence over a person’s life?

I’m going to go all individualistic and American here and say that I believe the way a person runs his life is in his own hands and based on personal choice. However, if one lacks the knowledge of a different method or the experience of a different way of living, then he is not really making a choice. In this situation, since he only knows one way, that is what he will do, but he is not actually choosing it because he doesn’t even know that there is another option. In my opinion, when people do not take the initiative to take a step out of their boxes, educate themselves, and figure out what is important to them, that is when they get stuck in their bubbles and their society gets the best of them. At least being aware that there is a different way and discovering how that way works is a start to finding a balance in life. I look to the way some of my friends live at home, and it puts my mind at ease, seeing that it is possible to counteract the societal pressure to always be one the run to catch a thousand time commitments on one’s schedule. I admire my friend Krista for her ability to foresee the possibility of plans changing and for allowing herself the flexibility to decide what she wants to do when the time comes – as opposed to three weeks in advance. Her family is a top priority in her life and there are few things – only occasionally – that ever take precedence over them. She stands her ground when it comes to making time for the things she holds dear in life, and anyone who knows Krista understands that. I also look to Robin and Karl, the couple with whom I lived for the 8 months prior to moving to Guatemala. They are the epitome of low stress! They have a family, and they both have jobs in fast-paced, technology-driven America, but their household is so laidback. They keep drama at a distance, don’t spend a lot of time worrying, and are always learning and doing new things, whether it is ceramics, cooking, learning to play the guitar, or rock climbing. I should nominate them to represent Nike! They are very active, but more importantly, they really spend time forming relationships, getting to know people, and then loving them. I also have friends who never seem to have enough time to keep up with relationships because “life gets pretty busy” with all the things they are trying to accomplish or all the drama in their lives that consumes their time. I know I used to be a friend like that to some people… I guess sometimes it can take awhile for a person to discover what his or her priorities are in life and to realize the people and things that are really important to him or her. I firmly believe that where one puts his or her time is where the heart is. Whether it is a physical presence, a phone call, a note, a prayer, or even just a thought directed towards family, friends, work, or a pastime, everyone spends their time somewhere. If you pay attention to where your time goes, you may learn something new about yourself or even identify something in your life that you’d like to change. To Guatemalans, time is life.

My host sister from Alotenango, Helen, and I got to spend some quality time together when we went out for pizza at a restaurant overlooking ruins in Antigua last week.

To wrap up this discussion, I hereby grant myself a brownie point in punctuality. Don’t get your hopes up too much – I’m not saying that my personality has changed or that I will ever stop being the slow, processing type, but I am recognizing self-improvement in the way I view and handle time. Getting a taste of my own medicine on a regular basis gives me a little perspective. Lol! So my point is for gained perspective and for learning to NOT stress out over time anymore. For being such an organized planner, I am actually adapting really well to the lack of planning here, and I am learning to go with the flow. By depending on the unpredictability of the land, I am learning to incorporate “cushion time” into my planning. Even when I am prepared for something to happen and things don’t go as planned, I am enjoying the impromptu challenge to be creative and think outside the box. I do respect setting deadlines, but I see them more as a guideline to focus a project (except when it comes to paying bills, but if you pay those early, you don’t even have to think about the due date). In regards to running a meeting or catching the bus, I have gotten much better about my punctuality. If we show up too late after our determined start time for a meeting, the people would probably have gone home already! And if I don’t get to the micro early, it might leave without me – on the whim of the driver – and then I don’t go anywhere! It’s different when you have to depend on other people in order to get anything done (collectivist/community culture). There is less pressure on oneself – less stress and accountability, but much patience and flexibility required, which I am acquiring more of every day. I am enjoying the freedom of it all and formulating a different outlook on the passing of time. I feel like I have all the time in the world! Things that require a significant time commitment – for example, med school, grad school, or any other continuation of education or training as well as other “personal endeavors” – don’t seem so threatening to me anymore. I’ve always had a fear of signing away chunks of my life thinking I would lose that time, but I have a different view now: life is what we make of it, and just because I am in school doesn’t mean that my life will be boring; in fact, it could probably be more interesting than just working! Besides, I’ve always liked school, well, the learning part of it anyway. Russell says, “Time is humanity’s greatest asset; it can neither be gained nor lost, but only fulfilled to the best of our abilities.” So with that tucked in the back of my mind, I am learning to engage in what is right in front me, and I feel like the time I have spent here has been extremely fulfilling thus far – both in experiences and growth. I can’t help constantly thinking about the future since I have so much time to formulate new ideas and discover my likes and dislikes, but I don’t think it is taking me away from living in the present moment. If anything, it is enriching the activities I do on a daily basis.

When I get out for a weekend, I often get to enjoy the company of some fellow PCVs. Here Jacob, myself, Linnea, & Riley are out dancing in Panajachel.

Jenny and Linnea are celebrating Halloween dressed as Harry Potter and Pippi Longstocking, respectively, during our get-together in Huehuetenango.

Well, I spent the whole of October in my site, with the exception of the very first weekend when I went to Lago (Lake) de Atitlán and Panajachel and the very last weekend for a Halloween get-together with a bunch of PCVs in Huehuetenango. So for about four weeks in between those two ventures, life in San Andrés was eventful, to say the least. First I’ll start with the animal situation. I consider myself a “dog person,” and I was hoping that upon moving in to a stable place in Guatemala, I would be able to have a little puppy companion. Well, I didn’t really have a choice in the matter since I moved into a house that came with a bunch of complimentary cats – one of which was pregnant at the time. The night I got back from the lake, I had a feeling that Mama Kitty was going to pop so I invited her into my bathroom onto a towel I laid down and sure enough, 3 hours later, there were three fresh kittens – two girls and a boy – to add to our collection around the house. They’re at a cute phase now that they have learned to scamper around and play with each other. Their names are Serena (the calm, firstborn), Bella (the one with the pretty face), and Nacho [el macho] (the only boy). October also included the NGO event, Sarahy’s 4^th birthday for which we threw a Barney-themed party, Taira starting a job in town for which she had to go through almost two months of interviews and testing, sharing recipes and cooking together with Taira, and even planning a game night at home. Basically, although the weather was miserable for two-thirds of the month, October produced the first real feelings of integration for me here. Taira is my new best girlfriend which is awesome because she is just like my girlfriends from home – easygoing, intelligent, classy, and kind. We relate to other well and have become very close. Relishing in the fact that I was a homebody for practically a month, I had a chance in October to get caught up on a lot of “keeping in touch” which made me feel good because as November slides nicely along, it will take me away from my site and my “routine.”

The kittens added a lot of entertainment to our household. Here, Nacho is only about a week old – eyes not yet opened – and fits perfectly in the palm of my hand.

This is Sarahy on her birthday – so excited as she waits for the party to start. All the Barney decorations Taira made by hand. We spent all morning blowing up balloons and spreading pine needles all across the floor which is a tradition for Guatemalan parties – both to be festive and for the scent. It smelled like Christmas all day!

When the rain stopped, the wind picked up, launching kite season in Guatemala. On All-Saints Day, which is a national holiday here, I made my way down to Sumpango, near Antigua, to be a part of the annual giant Kite Festival. With an atmosphere similar to that of a county fair, this well-known cultural event was the most organized Guatemalan affair I have yet witnessed and had the biggest, most elaborate kites I have ever seen. The gigantic kites were just for show, but all the “smaller” and medium-sized kites had the chance to fly! I’m glad I got to be a part of such a wonderful event. To top off November thus far, a few days ago, Guatemala had the run-off presidential elections and everything was peaceful and went smoothly. The way this country is run on the national level might entirely change come January! But Guatemalans are used to ever-changing plans and policies. Haha! The rest of my month may very well be an exciting blur. I leave town Saturday to run the half-marathon in Xela on Sunday morning, then from there I head straight to Antigua because I have “Reconnect” (where our PST training group reunites and gets more information on how to implement our work) and Maya language (K’iche) lessons all week at the PC Office, then I’ll visit with my host family again for a day or two. I’ll only be back in site for a couple days before I head out again for Thanksgiving vacation – I am planning to go out to the Caribbean coast to visit Rio Dulce and Lívingston with a group of [mostly second-year PCV] girls. When I get back to San Andrés, we have féria going on for the last couple days of November (I’ll talk more about that next time). So this is my travel month, and I am looking forward to every second of it! The weather here is beautiful now and still warm although there is a chill in the air, and, all in all, I am very healthy and happy.

This is the Kite Festival in Sumpango, cotton candy man and all. Each kite was equally ornate as it was enormous!

Going down the line, each artist had a chance to fly his own kite. Here is what a giant kite looks like flying high above the crowd. It can be dangerous to the crowd when they come crashing down! But I guess that is just part of the excitement of the day…

Love,

Alexandra

EXTRA! EXTRA!

Thank you Grandma for the note with the St. Mary’s article! And thank you Kellie and Linda & Michelle for the fantastic care packages with goodies, entertainment, and lots of peanut butter! YUM! I’m a happy camper…

Happy Birthday to my November-baby family members, Teri & Ariana!

Happy [Early] Thanksgiving to everyone! Turkey is one of the things I’ve been missing A LOT here (as well as cheddar cheese, sour cream, Italian food, a really good, tender steak with garlic mashed potatoes and asparagus on the side, and crème brulée), and this is my first Thanksgiving ever that I will not be eating turkey, so please have a little extra in my honor, if you can find the space. Oh, and throw in a nice big piece of pumpkin pie with a good-sized dollop of cool whip, too!

Guatemala doesn’t try to mess with time and thus does not practice Daylight Savings. So for the handful of you who call me every now and then, keep in mind that I am now two hours ahead of (later than) PST/California time!